I'm not sure if this thread is in the proper place, but I am sure someone will be along and move it if it is not.
Straight to the point, then. I have been seeing a woman for close to a year now. We live a few hours away from each other. She is an ENFP and I am an INTJ. I thought things were going along fine with us, considering the distance and her schedule. Two months ago she said she wanted to take our relationship back a notch or two. Meaning and saying slow it down and look at expectations. I agreed. Now, thinking back over several things, I am wondering if I have been unbelievably clueless. She is a very private person, which I can respect, however, I am questioning the reasons for this privacy. Input would be of interest, please.
a) She comes to my apartment and has said that I cannot come to her's out of respect for her roommate, who is her ex-boyfriend. She said they have an agreement to not bring dates/lovers home.
b) I have never met any of her friends and I am unlikely to.
c) She has told only one or two people she is seeing me.
d) Although we are both online and are aware of that, she will contact me only after a certain time of night. There are a few exceptions to this, but it is rare.
e) When we do talk, she is often distracted by phone calls, either personal or work, or a chat room she frequents. We use Skype and most nights our total talk time, if it was compared to face to face, is anywhere from five minutes to twenty minutes.
f) She will drive up to see me once or twice a month for the weekend. She tells me she will be here on Saturday, but does not get here until Saturday night. About fifty percent of the time she will leave Sunday afternoon, the other fifty percent Monday morning.
I am not sure how I feel about any of this, I think at this point, perhaps indifferent, but as I said, I would like some input.