[NF] Which NF type would you pick for your SO?

[nightwatcher]

While I don’t rule out any type, NFs are usually the ones I’m most attracted to. To those of you like me who adore NFs, the question here is: which one is best for a geeky INXJ or (fill in your type)?

To narrow it down, the best friend I ever had was an ENFP, but I don’t think she would have worked for me as a girlfriend or I for her, because while she liked spending time with me one on one, she was a much more social animal. As you can imagine, she wanted to go to parties, clubs, hang out with groups of her friends, fill in the rest. I did stuff like this with her occasionally, but would have been expected to much more frequently if we were in a relationship. So I think we can be good friends, ENFPs, but you’d be bored with an INXJ geek who’s happy to spend a Friday night reading at Border’s.

ENFJ: same problem. We could be close friends, but you’re another kind of social animal whose usually big into things like family events and all that kind of fun Fe stuff that makes me want to stand by the exit door in case I have to make a quick getaway.

INFJ: there are real possibilities here. My last INFJ girlfriend is someone I sometimes wish I could have found a way to hold onto.

In the end, though, INFP gets my vote because I like both the INF compatibility and J/P balance, which makes us alike but not too much alike, as long as we can strike a compromise about certain things. I have a moderate J preference, about 70%, so I think it’s workable since I’m not a J fanatic out to incarcerate your gorgeously chaotic universe into orderly rows of soulless plastic boxes and you’re not going to bury me your in “creative” messes and change our plans at the last minute more than 50% of the time.

 

[Little Linguist]

Hope this works!

Maybe I am a weird ENFP, but I never have the drive to go to parties and clubs. BLEHHHHH!!!! Of course, I am exuberant and love engaging people, but NOT in a setting like that. How can you have any kind of meaningful exchange (ideas, feelings, intellectual debate, or even chit chat) in a place full of glaring lights, drunk idiots, and blaring music? It's like being trapped in a virtual MTV world - a world virtually swimming in SP or some other crazy thing I do not even WANT to try to characterize.

I don't know: traditional partying - drinking a lot, barfing, burping, and farting a lot (either with your ass or your mouth) - ain't my idea of a good time!

Now a group of friends (small) around an open fireplace, discussing about fascinating topics or books, debating the world into a better place, expressing feelings, sharing stories, or having a movie marathon (maybe even with a discussion about the plot and characters over a bottle of wine with a cat and a dog in a wooden basket with a fleece blanket) and classical music (Baroque, Romantic, whatever - assuming there is no film on) in the background - that's a party.

What the hell, why not throw a few stuffed animals into the mix and bring them to life and tell stories about how the dog ate so much potato salad that he farted his way to the moon! )) That's how I make my husband take the IXXJ out of his butt.

But I seriously need "down" time, or else I get burnout. I work six days a week, twelve hours a day sometimes as a teacher. While it energizes me to no end (I feel better if I work 12 hours than if I work 2), I do need those times when I zone out in front of the computer, read a book, etc.

In fact, I was also a fan of camping out at Border's in the States. That was before I got married and moved to Germany, though.

 

[swordpath]

That's a really tough question.

I don't know that I can answer it. Maybe infp (or a tame enfp lol).

 

[nozflubber]

I voted ENFP on the assumption she wouldn't be a slut and cheat, which I've read can be a problem for 'em. I can handle the social butterfly stuff, but infidelity = out

 

[cafe]

ENFP, I think. I've seen an INFJ/ENFP pairing that has lasted a long time and seems very happy.

 

[Atomic Fiend]

I don't think I would pick another NF.

Variety is the spice of life.

 

[JAVO]

I think any of these types could make for a compatible SO. It all depends on personality factors and other factors outside MBTI type.

 

[cafe]

I don't think I would pick another NF.

Variety is the spice of life.

Me neither. I seem to have a thing for INTPs, but if we're being hypothetical and stuff . . .

 

[prplchknz]

I tend to get on really well with INFJs but I don't see why I couldn't get along with ENFPs or ENFJs INFPs are too much like me, that while I can hang with them I just don't think we'd be good SOs too many similarities

 

[Randomnity]

I've never been attracted to an NF before (or an SF for that matter), and don't see it happening in the future, but INFJ would probably be most likely, since they tend to be more rational, at least in my experience. I can't ever see myself dating an FP - it would probably end in great carnage.

 

[SillySapienne]

I voted ENFP on the assumption she wouldn't be a slut and cheat, which I've read can be a problem for 'em.

A.) This is complete bollocks.

B.) I hate the word slut, and I hate both men and women who refer to women as sluts.

C.) So, apparently, I hate you!

D.)

 

[WobblyStilettos]

An ENFJ or ENFP would be far too tiring, an INFP would mean nothing would ever get done around the house, so INFJ it is

 

[phoenix13]

ENFJs would help me get out of the house more... I've become a real hermit as of late. They're also quite charming.

INFJs are my second choice, however in my experience (I only know one) they can be a bit sensitive and miscommunications abound.

Another ENFP would be fun for 3 days. After that, burn-out and boredom.

INFP is my last choice. Fi is a pain in the ass (believe me, I know)!

 

[Little Linguist]

Okay, just for the record, I'm ENFP, happily married, and that is that. So we do not all live up to that awful reputation.

 

[Totenkindly]

ENFJ, hands down.

ENFP is too flighty and/or temperamental for me personally, although I love bouncing around the cosmos with them. (Me and Targ, wheee!)

INFJs, I like but I can't read most of them and I get confused. They internalize a lot, in general, and the Ni leaves them very inscrutable unless they are very good at putting out steady signals.

I love INFPs but there is still a Ti/Fi clash. INFP friends are good to talk to, but I don't know about marriage.

ENFJs are extroverted but in a low-key way (so they're engaging).
Their Ni means they usually can see my POV and that of others, and I have a strong Ni. Also allows for lots of fun moments.
They also tend to be responsible and are thinking long-term about other people's personal growth and care about it -- same as I do. I am more primarily an explorer and model builder, but usually to the ends of growth for people, and they have similar passions. I have a stroke of seriousness underneath all the goofy, and they have it too.
Their Fe and mine actually locks up too, there are certain ways people should be treated, so we both have similar interaction styles in that way and agree on a "best approach."
Finally, I like them being F's because if I was with a T, I'd probably end up having to play more "F" and I just cannot do it long-term to that degree. The T person would also feel far too cold to me and I couldn't make a deep-enough connection. The F provided by the ENFJ gives me space to be me.

 

[Magic Poriferan]

Okay, just for the record, I'm ENFP, happily married, and that is that. So we do not all live up to that awful reputation.

We each get a unique, awful reputation, didn't you know that?


Ummm... This is hard to pick. My first point is the old rule that type may not be a good gauge for picking a partner.

If I could assume things about the relationship, though, this would still be tough. I have a bias toward NFs, so it's a close competition. I'm probably going to say ENFJ > ENFP > INFP > INFJ.

Unfortunately, I'm kind of scarred with INFPs because my mom is one, and I don't like her, and I don't want people to torment me with Freudian bullcrap. Even still, they go higher than INFJs because they have a real tendency to depress me... Also, there's another family problem there. One of my brothers is an INFJ, and that kind of numbs it for me.

 

[redacted]

INFJ is probably the only NF type i'd be interested in. ENFJ is possible i guess if they were healthy.

but i just like those NT girls so much more...

 

[alicia91]

I'm not attracted to NFs at all in terms of romantic love/attraction but I do have a couple of NF friends. I'm really only attracted to T-men.

 

[dorareever]

INFP.

I like inbreeding.

 

[Tigerlily]

I chose my type since I married an NT.