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  1. #1
    defying your expectations SoraMayhem's Avatar
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    Default Fi doms, describe your relationship with your emotions.

    Would any of you say that you have a 'fraught' quality to some of your emotional/primary Fi processing? I have a theory that those with dominant Fi may have more of a 'neutral' emotional slate, or have a more difficult time accessing or analyzing their emotional state in the absence of strong emotion. I myself will usually not respond in an 'emotional' way unless someone is challenging one of my values.

    Another way which Fi doms may describe themselves as emotionless is in the context of their personal relationships. Fi doesn't always lend itself to social convention or to facile emotional interfacing, and this may cause fractures in the relationships of some Fi dominant people.

    Of course, Enneagram may have some effect on whether any of this applies to you - I can imagine this might be more accurate to types 5, 6, 9, possibly 1, and certain 4s (who may also at times consider themselves emotionless when not experiencing strong feelings).

    Any thoughts?
    Last edited by SoraMayhem; 02-13-2013 at 02:42 PM. Reason: clarification
    4w5-1w2-5w4 -- RLUAI -- Chaotic Good/Neutral

    Johari -- Nohari

    Ask me about my crippling social dysfunction!

  2. #2
    Sugar Hiccup OrangeAppled's Avatar
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    I don't tend to have strong emotions around other people. Sometimes if people try to get a reaction out of me, I withdraw further, stubborn to not let them affect me. This can give the appearance of letting stuff roll of my back (but it can build internally). This non-reaction looks cold, indifferent, and even dismissive at times.

    When I'm alone, then I tend to explore the depths of human emotion & purposely may stir up reactions in myself just to see what it's like.... because I experience emotions as informative, not something to act directly on or not question the validity of. The head-heart conflict (or really, I'd call it rational valuations vs emotional desires/reactions conflict) is a big thing with me. I have a lot of inner tumult over how I should feel (as imposed by me) and how I do feel (as experienced by me). Most of the time, I reconcile the two by realizing my ideals are not as reasonable as I thought (too high/strict, not letting myself be human) & by identifying the real source of an emotion as opposed to its trigger. This can take a long time, and it's nothing I'm willing to air to others in the process.

    I don't know how much of this is Fi or e4.... I tend to realize less how important something is to me until it is missing, which can make me seem cool & aloof to family & friends. This is definitely a "violation of values" reaction (to not express or even experience feeling over something until it's take away).

    I know 4s amplify emotions to get all the juice out, and 5s may repress until a time when they can detach & analyze in privacy. I'm something between the 4 & 5. I have non-reactions in the moment, but later will experience something "fraught" as you say, and may even work myself up further into a tizzy, but then I may detach a bit & analyze a lot too.
    Often a star was waiting for you to notice it. A wave rolled toward you out of the distant past, or as you walked under an open window, a violin yielded itself to your hearing. All this was mission. But could you accomplish it? (Rilke)

    INFP | 4w5 sp/sx | RLUEI - Primary Inquisitive | Tritype is tripe

  3. #3
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    I do not think Fi is remotely related to emotions but I do believe the introspective pre-requisities of the function do make observation of emotions easier. The closest I can compare emotion to Fi is of a presenter and an audience. The audience follow what the presenter wants and reacts accordingly. In the case of Fi it claims "this is valued but not as much as b and its not as valued as it was xyz time ago" and any emotions follow a few moments later whether they be happy or sad. The presenter is aware of what the audience thinks and this is what it is like with Fi for me. Even if the audience is silent the presenter will likely have some idea or where they are at. I can reflect on my emotions effortlessly even if they are not firing up or intense but sometimes a strong emotion will come up which I had not anticipated. My introspection missed it and I find myself trying to understand where it came from.

    My emotions are there flowing in and around the Fi and I am happy with them as long as they do not interfere with Fi's functioning. I am comfortable with them and do prefer the feeling of inner emotion compared to desolation and emptiness. I do not care whether I am happy or sad in a certain respect (part of me is always detached from emotion as if I am merely observing from another room) however I become frustrated by them when they interfere with my thought process, interrupting Fi's calculations and workings or leading them to incorrect conclusions e.g. falling in love with ideas or people who I have long since declared to no longer be valued. My emotions are not likely to be high around others unless they are people I have strong (or negative) rapport with. Normally they flare up due to reflection and the only way the outside world plays a part is if it influences the subject of reflection.

    Tl;dr version: I am ok with emotion as part of me is comfortably immersed in it and another is comfortably detached from it. I become "fraught" on occasion and whilst an emotion overload does not remove me from the part of me which is detached and observed it can cause me to not be able to focus as much on it. For the most part however its an amiable set-up.

  4. #4
    defying your expectations SoraMayhem's Avatar
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    @OrangeAppled: I understand what you mean by stirring up reactions in yourself for the sake of experience. In fact, I relate to a lot of what you say, especially what seems to be the intellectualizing of emotion. It may be more common than I anticipated; however, this could have a lot to do with the 5-fixation in your Enneagram.
    (btw, love the Neruda quote in your signature!)

    I'd like to hear from any other Fi doms, especially if you don't relate to this at all.
    4w5-1w2-5w4 -- RLUAI -- Chaotic Good/Neutral

    Johari -- Nohari

    Ask me about my crippling social dysfunction!

  5. #5
    Gone Aesthete's Avatar
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    Do you know how people tend to begin viewing their beliefs and fancies more and more irrational after reflecting on them? How with time passion dies? To me, it's the exact opposite: with time, it just becomes stronger and more passionate - especially when I reflect on it. And, if it does begin to falter at any point, I feel like I'm offending my very being, leading to more intensity.
    Great men are like eagles, and build their nest on some lofty solitude.

    Schopenhauer

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