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  1. #61
    Shaman BlackCat's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by erinavery View Post
    we actually are friendly and engaging with people because we are genuinely excited to meet them and talk with them.
    Well if that's what you meant then I don't see how someone is immune to that.
    () 9w8-3w4-7w6 tritype.

    sCueI (primary Inquisition)

  2. #62
    Senior Member Tiny Army's Avatar
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    Oh, so people who use their charm to manipulate a social situation and are phony?

    I suppose I am probably an unhealthy ENFP. I was diagnosed borderline a few years back, but discovering my MBTI was what helped me become healthier. I could finally figure out what parts of my behaviour were a part of my personality and what parts were me being crazy. I had a better understanding of how an unhealthy ENFP behaved and was better able to curb that behaviour.

    I find that ENFPs with a higher J function can tend to be more manipulative than hardcore Ps. Teenage ENFPs can be way judgier and that can be hard for an INFP. They get better in college, trust me.

  3. #63
    mod love baby... Lady_X's Avatar
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    blackcat how the hell do you know so many enfp's? that's crazy.

    and many of your posts do actually read that way to me...you seem to be saying that all these enfp's are always trying to charm their way into your life but you find them annoying and don't want anything to do with them....it sounds a bit arrogant yeah...but okay...so you just mean the unhealthy ones and i guess unhealthy people are annoying regardless of type...so okay.
    There can’t be any large-scale revolution until there’s a personal revolution, on an individual level. It’s got to happen inside first.
    -Jim Morrison

  4. #64
    Senior Member Moiety's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by erinavery View Post
    yeah...i have a problem with people trying to insinuate that to be "charming" is to be fake and/or manipulative. we actually are friendly and engaging with people because we are genuinely excited to meet them and talk with them. it's not bs...it's not an act...it's honest and people respond to it because it feels good to have someone genuinely enjoy your company...why would someone wish to paint that so negatively?
    I think this has to do with cynicism. People always expect hypocrisy from others, in some form. It's sad, but it's the world we live in.

  5. #65
    mod love baby... Lady_X's Avatar
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    right...projection i guess. since they would be faking if they were to act that way they assume we are too...well hey! we're not!
    There can’t be any large-scale revolution until there’s a personal revolution, on an individual level. It’s got to happen inside first.
    -Jim Morrison

  6. #66
    Shaman BlackCat's Avatar
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    Well now that I think about it (I know what you are talking erin about is going back to the EFs teasing thread) it seems like a lot of EFs who are unhealthy do this. Adjust to someone and act fake to get them to like them, which I think is from an unhealthy obsession with wanting everyone to love them. I have experienced this WAY too much and I think it's made me suspicious of people's motives, and that may be why you get that vibe from me. I can usually tell if someone is being fake though, so it's not a real problem for me.

    I usually have at least two ENFPs per class, I have no idea how. I usually meet them and realize "Oh this person is an ENFP, no wonder they started talking to me." They are the most common intuitive type (what I read anyways) so it's no surprise to me that there are a lot of them. Plus I'd say metaphysical practices attract a lot of NFs, with ENFPs being the most common N... Yeah.

    Miscommunication killed the cat, sorry if I unintentionally offended someone.
    () 9w8-3w4-7w6 tritype.

    sCueI (primary Inquisition)

  7. #67
    Habitual Fi LineStepper JocktheMotie's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sytpg View Post
    I think this has to do with cynicism. People always expect hypocrisy from others, in some form. It's sad, but it's the world we live in.
    This is true, however I'm nearly as cynical as you can get yet I find ENFPs extremely genuine people. I think Blackcat's statement about ENFP charming had more to do with how he saw it rather than accurately describing an ENFP socialization style.

    Although I do agree with Udog's statement, the ENFPs I know become very interested in people that don't like them. Can't count the number of conversations about "that guy at the party that wouldn't talk to me." I don't know if they take it personally or what.



  8. #68
    mod love baby... Lady_X's Avatar
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    i think i understand your position more now, thanks for clarifying.

    you'll have to understand being genuine is of extreme importance to me so it bothers me greatly to be painted otherwise so excuse me for being so defensive really.
    There can’t be any large-scale revolution until there’s a personal revolution, on an individual level. It’s got to happen inside first.
    -Jim Morrison

  9. #69
    Senior Member Tiny Army's Avatar
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    Well, I can understand BlackCat having a bias against ENFPs. His/her(?) mother is apparently a very overbearing ENFP. I tend to be biased against J types because my parents are incredibly overbearing J types. My ENFJ mother made me so crazy with her Fe that if I detect serious Fe in someone I back away immediately. My ENTJ dad, as crazy as he makes me is responsible for my high Te, which I developed to deal with his dominant function.

    I'd just like to say that you will meet ENFPs who are good people (and not your mother) and won't try to worm their way into your life under false or flimsy pretenses.

  10. #70
    Shaman BlackCat's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by erinavery View Post
    you'll have to understand being genuine is of extreme importance to me so it bothers me greatly to be painted otherwise so excuse me for being so defensive really.
    You seem to be as an ENFP should be erin. This is another one of the many reasons that I have to want out of this age range, too many idiots. I understand why you acted the way you do also. I'm not sure whether other ENFPs do this but one of my best friends (known him since I was 8, ENFP) turns into a male beta fish when he is being accused of not being genuine or if he sees something not genuine.

    I will admit that I have a problem projecting my true thoughts. That is why I HAD to compensate, it makes me angry when I see this working against me.
    () 9w8-3w4-7w6 tritype.

    sCueI (primary Inquisition)

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