I have an uncanny feeling that, at times, I am 'gaming' personality tests, as if I have an attachment to the INFJ type, and, given that I've read so much about the different cognitive functions, know immediately how to answer the questions to 'maintain' said label.
Can anyone else relate? Or is such a tendency or observation simply another clue towards type?
A more interesting question: "WHY do I feel the need to identify with a specific type?"
Perhaps because I'm tired of feeling like a chameleon? Perhaps because I like to feel validated by something beyond my own judgement?
Generally I test out as xNxx, although the INFJ function stack resonates the strongest with me. Still - this nagging need for closure and paranoid surveying of potential personal motives can be quite exhausting. Why do I find it so hard to simply DO, to live and act in the pursuit of satisfaction? Why do I instead indulge in mental masturbation games all day long? And why do I put so much weight on MBTI? I have definitely found value in it, but worry that I am using it more as a burdensome checklist than a tool of utility.
Know thyself? Easier said than done.
I've found that doing the opposite, actively forgetting myself, or attempting to stop knowing myself, while also separating myself from others, seems to be a better angle to connect with something that feels profound, correct, centered. I think that I often concern myself more with intended audience perception than I do with self-expression. The only place I've found solace from this is in a flow state of 'play'... I've found no better way to pointedly create space (or at least an absence of... something) in which I can solidify and share an inner reflexivity with easy, compassionate certitude.
And, the kicker - did I just write the above to try and sound like an INFJ, or did I write from my core, from my essence? Mind games I tell ya!