Mane jumping in; but he certainly came into this thread with his own agenda. He saw an opportunity to again pursue his healing journey and I honestly don't begrudge him that. And he knows the thread took on collateral damage as a result. Mane chose a word that definitely brought out some very strong emotions and reactions from the INFJ camp, which is cool yet also problematic. The issue is for me 1.) I still think remorse is the wrong word 2.) He chose it specifically to elicit maximal reactivity and 3.) It increased the number of INFJ's that have checked out of this thread.
Some useful stuff came out of that, but from my perspective, at a high price.
I suppose you too were looking to bring to balance your negative personal experiences, challenge what was starting to look like patterns in your life ... the point evades me trying to explain why that's stressful to INFJ's, but I guess it is what it is. It's about mixing personal stuff with theoretical stuff ... yet the fundament for theoretical stuff is often that same empirical data.
Ah well, I just started thinking again and I already feel muddy on it. It'll take time for the silt to drop out of the water for me on this thread.
I think there's an obvious difference too. But if INFJ's don't see it that way, I don't know how to reconcile that.There's an obvious difference. It only has to be explained if people insist on making everything black & white, in which case, they don't really want to understand the difference. These detractors don't have anything to do with the core discussion though. They can't contribute nor take away.
Yes, if I have any bone to pick it's with the whole premise of the thread. It was an invitation, and I for one decided to come back to the party and perhaps learn some more about INFJ's too, expand my understanding. But I feel like I've been handed my hat and I'm standing at the door on my way out. And, I don't dare turn my back or I may find a hatchet buried in it ...Also, let's review the thread title: "INFPs, what do INFJs do that drives you nuts?". My initial post was answering that question, which was solicited by an INFJ. The first few paragraphs were certainly wry, and I don't see the difference between it and INFP fluffy bunny half-jokes, or ESTJ micro-manager half-jokes, etc. I didn't think INFJs were above a razz, and of course there is some real irritation there (see the thread topic again).
Anyways, I have no hard feelings, and I hope no one has any against me; please send me a PM if you do and I will happy to work through it - I was happy to learn a couple of extra things and if I can expand my thoughts on remorse specifically I'll post back on that.