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  1. #11
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    Quote Originally Posted by Crescent Fresh View Post
    I think it's part of NF's curse to suffer from this syndrome, even though there are slightly different approach for between Ne-dom and Ni-dom.

    What works for me is to unlearn GiGS by bringing myself back to the present. And I have two suggestions:




    1. Practice gratitude.

    Gratitude isn’t just a feeling, it’s a practice. When you’re feeling grateful, it’s because you’re noticing what you have in your life that you love, and that makes you feel loved. Most of us think that gratitude, happiness, peace and all the other wonderful things we want to feel just happen to us, but that’s not the case. Our feelings are always a result of our thoughts.

    You can get into the practice of creating gratitude by asking yourself questions that focus your awareness on what you love in your life. So ask yourself, “What are the things I wouldn't give away at this moment? What went well for me today? What makes me feel very blessed in the present?” And if you are feeling dissatisfied, ask yourself, "What's important to me now? What do I need to fix it? How do I already have that in my life in places where I haven't been noticing? And how can I bring more of that to my life now?"

    When you contemplate these questions and answer them honestly, you’ll experience authentic gratitude.

    Then try to write a few positive things by noticing the smallest gratitude in written format (I would suggest no more than 3). And the next day, add a few additional things on a separate list, along with the previous points. So that within a week, you'll have a pretty good list of things that you felt grateful and keep brining you back to the present.


    2. Practice mindfulness.

    I think sometimes we forget the whole point of happiness, and mindfulness is part of it. Essentially, it's being happy no matter where you are in the world, or what you're doing, or whom you're with. Being mindful quiets the mind and brings us a sense of peace that no other quest for a "perfect life" could ever bring.

    The way to achieve this is to balance our energy. Whenever you felt GiGS is hitting you hard, convince yourself through rationalization that our thoughts have feelings attached. Sometimes the feelings make sense. But many times, our feelings are out of sync with our thoughts. So whenever this happens, re-read the gratitude list you've created. This will help you to balance both spheres of 'contentment of present and exploring "what ifs" from the future. Remember you do not have to forcefully to pull away your Ne's optimism because that's part of your dominant function. Learn to embrace it by balancing both present and future's mindfulness as one single entity.

    This way, mindfulness helps you to appreciate life as it happens. It stops us from agonizing over what might've been or what could be. It just brings us back to the present.





    So next time, when you are looking for a different situation, look within yourself by shifting the focus of thoughts and feelings. Remember that happiness isn't having what you want, but it's about wanting what you have already. Since mind is a powerful thing and positivism is such a rare gift among Ne users, learn now to stay positive in the present so that you will become a magnet for the greener grass and you won't have to go "over there.' It will come to you eventually.


    Edit: When you practice mindfulness, try to breath very slowly and listen to your own heartbeats and breathing patterns as it can enhance the power of synergizing both energies as one.
    This is great advice.

    Recognizing that others exist in this world is a great way to slow down my days.

    Utilizing Ne in conversate with those I love most and let them know I care.

  2. #12
    i love skylights's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by mmhmm View Post
    in a romantic context?
    or in general?
    /nosy
    In general. Not really romantic. 97% of the time I want to lash the boy to me so he can't run away (and so he keeps me warm at night).

    Quote Originally Posted by xenaprincess View Post
    There are all these other issues one doesn't see, when one's doing that sort of thing.

    Sure the grass is greener, but maybe it smells awful. But you don't smell it because the wind is blowing the other way.

    urban metaphor -
    I got a seat on the subway last night but then this guy got on the train and held onto the pole next to me. Holy cow, stink stunk stank. Pee-yoo.

    From a distance someone must have thought, oh, lucky gal! She got a seat on the subway! But the stink!!

    I had to get up and move.
    haha!
    Oh no! Very true. I have a weird problem where when something is an option, I idealize it, and when it is a reality, I trivialize it. I think it revolves around fear - fear that I have chosen wrong and am stuck with something that is limiting my potential happiness. Which is ultimately stupid, because thinking like that makes me very unhappy.

    Quote Originally Posted by AffirmitiveAnxiety View Post
    Development of a well rounded secondary judging function.
    Mmm, that is a good idea. Some healthy Fi parenting could give runaway Ne the buttkick it needs.

    Quote Originally Posted by JocktheMotie View Post
    Well sure, any Ne user has been there. The hypotheticals are always so wonderful, every nascent idea, new thing, overflowing with this wonderful possibility. Ne doms and users are such optimists when it comes to these things.

    Just have to temper some of that excitement with some thorough thinking/feeling. That new job opportunity might have a catch or two, that guy over there who seems smart and interesting online might be some 30 year old jobless bum, that new house might have been a former meth lab/Nazi concentration camp, etc.
    That first paragraph is worded so perfectly!

    Good points. Add T/F to Ne to add realistic judgment to possibilities.

    I suppose something I have never thought of before is that the present is an option, too, not just something I am saddled with. I can either choose to maintain it or choose to change it.

    Quote Originally Posted by UniqueMixture View Post
    Invert the wave functions to cancel them out/minimize them
    So think of all the potential negatives to cancel out the positives?

    Quote Originally Posted by Chiharu View Post
    I HATE this. Seriously, it's the best way to torture yourself for hours upon hours, thinking yourself into a frenzy
    I KNOW D:

    Quote Originally Posted by CreativeCait View Post
    This is my approach. Not sure its the best...

    Explore all your options as far as you can without committing to them or destroying your chances elsewhere. Find out as much as possible about them. Try and see if they are achievable and weigh the pluses and minuses.

    In short, get more information to find out what 'reality' would be like, rather than imagining it. Beware if things look too good or resemble a perfect dream. Examine the negatives and see whether you can live with

    them Fi).Exhaust your Ne and then use Te.
    That sounds like solid advice. Explore how ideas actually might play out instead of just imagining how they could play out.

    Quote Originally Posted by CreativeCait View Post
    Or maybe a better way to say it is structure your Ne to serve a specific purpose rather than giving it free reign
    INFP So that means letting Fi lead for a bit.

    Quote Originally Posted by Crescent Fresh View Post
    I think it's part of NF's curse to suffer from this syndrome, even though there are slightly different approach for between Ne-dom and Ni-dom.

    What works for me is to unlearn GiGS by bringing myself back to the present. And I have two suggestions:




    1. Practice gratitude.

    Gratitude isn’t just a feeling, it’s a practice. When you’re feeling grateful, it’s because you’re noticing what you have in your life that you love, and that makes you feel loved. Most of us think that gratitude, happiness, peace and all the other wonderful things we want to feel just happen to us, but that’s not the case. Our feelings are always a result of our thoughts.

    You can get into the practice of creating gratitude by asking yourself questions that focus your awareness on what you love in your life. So ask yourself, “What are the things I wouldn't give away at this moment? What went well for me today? What makes me feel very blessed in the present?” And if you are feeling dissatisfied, ask yourself, "What's important to me now? What do I need to fix it? How do I already have that in my life in places where I haven't been noticing? And how can I bring more of that to my life now?"

    When you contemplate these questions and answer them honestly, you’ll experience authentic gratitude.

    Then try to write a few positive things by noticing the smallest gratitude in written format (I would suggest no more than 3). And the next day, add a few additional things on a separate list, along with the previous points. So that within a week, you'll have a pretty good list of things that you felt grateful and keep brining you back to the present.


    2. Practice mindfulness.

    I think sometimes we forget the whole point of happiness, and mindfulness is part of it. Essentially, it's being happy no matter where you are in the world, or what you're doing, or whom you're with. Being mindful quiets the mind and brings us a sense of peace that no other quest for a "perfect life" could ever bring.

    The way to achieve this is to balance our energy. Whenever you felt GiGS is hitting you hard, convince yourself through rationalization that our thoughts have feelings attached. Sometimes the feelings make sense. But many times, our feelings are out of sync with our thoughts. So whenever this happens, re-read the gratitude list you've created. This will help you to balance both spheres of 'contentment of present and exploring "what ifs" from the future. Remember you do not have to forcefully to pull away your Ne's optimism because that's part of your dominant function. Learn to embrace it by balancing both present and future's mindfulness as one single entity.

    This way, mindfulness helps you to appreciate life as it happens. It stops us from agonizing over what might've been or what could be. It just brings us back to the present.





    So next time, when you are looking for a different situation, look within yourself by shifting the focus of thoughts and feelings. Remember that happiness isn't having what you want, but it's about wanting what you have already. Since mind is a powerful thing and positivism is such a rare gift among Ne users, learn now to stay positive in the present so that you will become a magnet for the greener grass and you won't have to go "over there.' It will come to you eventually.


    Edit: When you practice mindfulness, try to breath very slowly and listen to your own heartbeats and breathing patterns as it can enhance the power of synergizing both energies as one.
    This is wonderful. Thank you so much. I will definitely give these techniques a shot.

  3. #13
    F CK all I need is U ilikeitlikethat's Avatar
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    When ever I was in America, I would see London on TV, and miss it; When I'm here, I see America on TV and; Miss it. This taught me that sometimes, the grass is always greener on the other side of the Atlantic, no matter which side you're on.

  4. #14
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    ^

    I lived in Europe for half a year. While there, I eventually got a little homesick for the US. When I finally got back here, I grew homesick for Europe - and each country I'd lived in. It felt a little empty inside realizing that the more I travel, the more holes I will have in my heart. Then it occurred to me that maybe I should think of it more like I have homes to return to all over the world.

  5. #15
    mod love baby... Lady_X's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by skylights View Post
    ^

    I lived in Europe for half a year. While there, I eventually got a little homesick for the US. When I finally got back here, I grew homesick for Europe - and each country I'd lived in. It felt a little empty inside realizing that the more I travel, the more holes I will have in my heart. Then it occurred to me that maybe I should think of it more like I have homes to return to all over the world.
    ughh i know this well. i'm constantly missing whatever once was...or could be

    which for me doesn't devalue what is...it's just not being able to have all experiences at once. it's a desire not based in reality at all.

    one always has to choose....but decisions make me so uneasy. :/
    There can’t be any large-scale revolution until there’s a personal revolution, on an individual level. It’s got to happen inside first.
    -Jim Morrison

  6. #16
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lady X View Post
    one always has to choose....but decisions make me so uneasy. :/
    Me too. It's hard not to mourn the loss of possibilities when you're so good at seeing them.

  7. #17
    Professional Trickster Esoteric Wench's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by AffirmitiveAnxiety View Post
    Development of a well rounded secondary judging function.
    Pretty much!
    ENFP with kick*ss Te | 7w8 so | ♀

  8. #18
    No moss growing on me Giggly's Avatar
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    But.. but, this is part of the appeal of Ne users. If you stop doing this then we're all going to become bored to death.

  9. #19
    i love skylights's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Giggly View Post
    But.. but, this is part of the appeal of Ne users. If you stop doing this then we're all going to become bored to death.


    I haven't thought of it this way before!

  10. #20
    Sweet Ocean Cloud SD45T-2's Avatar
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    Ne brought this to mind:

    1w2-6w5-3w2 so/sp

    "I took one those personality tests. It came back negative." - Dan Mintz

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