User Tag List

First 12345 Last

Results 21 to 30 of 41

  1. #21
    Entertaining Cracker five sounds's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2013
    MBTI
    ENFP
    Enneagram
    729 sx/sp
    Socionics
    IEE Ne
    Posts
    5,634

    Default

    So I just found out my ex boyfriend is an ENTP. Found this thread searching for ENTP/ENFP relationships.

    We connected strongly, and stayed together for a little more than 3 years, but eventually it fell apart. He used to laugh openly at my ideas sometimes, but had a lot of short-sighted judgments from my point of view, which made him seem like he was being a jerk. I am a sx-dom ENFP, so I like to make connections with people, and I think that really bothered him. He'd get super mad and say hurtful things when that happened, which in turn pissed me off. I also wanted to explore my spirituality more, and really didn't feel supported in that at all by him. He laughed at me about it, and made fun of what I was doing.

    Otherwise, I believe he's a really sweet guy. We made great friends, but it turned out that we just weren't compatible in that way. I was the one who had to break it off with him, and he really tried hard to keep me around. Of course, that wound up meaning we were 'breaking up' for months before we finally broke it off for good.

    Does any of this sound ENFP/ENTP? Any insight? I really thought I was going to marry him for a while, and I'm just really interested in analyzing the whole thing.
    You hem me in -- behind and before;
    you have laid your hand upon me.
    Such knowledge is too wonderful for me,
    too lofty for me to attain.

  2. #22
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jun 2011
    MBTI
    ISFP
    Enneagram
    2 so/sx
    Posts
    455

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by nicolita View Post
    ... He used to laugh openly at my ideas sometimes ... He laughed at me about it, and made fun of what I was doing.
    One "trick" an INFJ taught me, was to patiently observe how people react to OTHER things and people and note if what was hurtful to me is something they do habitually.

    It kind of puts things into a broader perspective.

    Was he somebody who laughed a lot. Sometimes at things that would make you "wonder" what was funny there (a near-miss car accident. Funny?)

  3. #23
    Entertaining Cracker five sounds's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2013
    MBTI
    ENFP
    Enneagram
    729 sx/sp
    Socionics
    IEE Ne
    Posts
    5,634

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Istbkleta View Post
    One "trick" an INFJ taught me, was to patiently observe how people react to OTHER things and people and note if what was hurtful to me is something they do habitually.

    It kind of puts things into a broader perspective.

    Was he somebody who laughed a lot. Sometimes at things that would make you "wonder" what was funny there (a near-miss car accident. Funny?)
    He would laugh at other people he disagreed with too. I'm talking an open mocking laugh.

    I want to make clear that I don't mean to say a bunch of negative things about him. I mostly want to analyze the "bad" in our relationship to see if there were any type reasons why we didn't work out. With a lot of the other conflicts in my life, I've been able to point them back to a certain function or way of seeing or doing things that was simply incompatible with mine.
    You hem me in -- behind and before;
    you have laid your hand upon me.
    Such knowledge is too wonderful for me,
    too lofty for me to attain.

  4. #24
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jun 2011
    MBTI
    ISFP
    Enneagram
    2 so/sx
    Posts
    455

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by nicolita View Post
    With a lot of the other conflicts in my life, I've been able to point them back to a certain function or way of seeing or doing things that was simply incompatible with mine.
    If you put it this way, I'd say this is mostly Ne without conscious Fi.

    It sounds like the norm with most ENTPs.

    I don't know what the equivalent behaviors in ENFPs are: Ne without conscious Ti.

    Are you still friends?

  5. #25
    Entertaining Cracker five sounds's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2013
    MBTI
    ENFP
    Enneagram
    729 sx/sp
    Socionics
    IEE Ne
    Posts
    5,634

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Istbkleta View Post
    If you put it this way, I'd say this is mostly Ne without conscious Fi.

    It sounds like the norm with most ENTPs.

    I don't know what the equivalent behaviors in ENFPs are: Ne without conscious Ti.

    Are you still friends?
    Yeah we're still friends. I really feel like it was the most amicable split imaginable. His parents still talk like we belonged together which makes things a little weird, but things are totally cool between us.
    You hem me in -- behind and before;
    you have laid your hand upon me.
    Such knowledge is too wonderful for me,
    too lofty for me to attain.

  6. #26
    Chaser of Light Dr Mobius's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    MBTI
    ENTP
    Enneagram
    7w8 sp/sx
    Posts
    815

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by nicolita View Post
    So I just found out my ex boyfriend is an ENTP. Found this thread searching for ENTP/ENFP relationships.

    We connected strongly, and stayed together for a little more than 3 years, but eventually it fell apart. He used to laugh openly at my ideas sometimes, but had a lot of short-sighted judgments from my point of view, which made him seem like he was being a jerk. I am a sx-dom ENFP, so I like to make connections with people, and I think that really bothered him. He'd get super mad and say hurtful things when that happened, which in turn pissed me off. I also wanted to explore my spirituality more, and really didn't feel supported in that at all by him. He laughed at me about it, and made fun of what I was doing.

    Otherwise, I believe he's a really sweet guy. We made great friends, but it turned out that we just weren't compatible in that way. I was the one who had to break it off with him, and he really tried hard to keep me around. Of course, that wound up meaning we were 'breaking up' for months before we finally broke it off for good.

    Does any of this sound ENFP/ENTP? Any insight? I really thought I was going to marry him for a while, and I'm just really interested in analyzing the whole thing.
    Are you completely sure that your ex-partner was an ENTP? Not to try to play the fob them of to someone else game, but nothing you wrote seemed to indicate it, admittedly it was a very limited amount of information. It is just that ENTP and ENFP relations if you happen to read enough of these forums tend to go one of three ways:

    Option One
    ENTP and ENFP meet have an instant connection, proceed to have a whirlwind romance, until such time as reality kicks in, and someone has to start acting like an adult, which breeds resentment in the one who steps up; a minor annoyance becomes a major concern, and then comes the overly dramatic finale. Life span usually under the six months mark.

    Option Two
    ENFP and ENTP meet they enjoy each other’s company and hop on board the casual relationship express, at some point they both release that this isn’t enough for either of them and split amicably. Life span of relationship ending within twelve months.

    Option Three
    This is a combination of option one and option two; It starts of as option one, it then proceeds to a pregnancy, it usually starts with a few tumultuous years, until it quiets down to being more like option two, and then ends with an amicable split. Life span will probably be under the decade mark.

    Which is not to say your ex is not an ENTP, but the pattern of ENFP and ENTP relationships which is remarkably formulaic, combined with behaviours that are not something I would associate with ENTP’s; Occum’s Razor would say that you are more than likely barking up the wrong tree.
    “Brighter, now brighter, pay no mind to those who squint, burn with all your heat.”

  7. #27
    Entertaining Cracker five sounds's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2013
    MBTI
    ENFP
    Enneagram
    729 sx/sp
    Socionics
    IEE Ne
    Posts
    5,634

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Dr Mobius View Post
    Are you completely sure that your ex-partner was an ENTP? Not to try to play the fob them of to someone else game, but nothing you wrote seemed to indicate it, admittedly it was a very limited amount of information. It is just that ENTP and ENFP relations if you happen to read enough of these forums tend to go one of three ways:

    Option One
    ENTP and ENFP meet have an instant connection, proceed to have a whirlwind romance, until such time as reality kicks in, and someone has to start acting like an adult, which breeds resentment in the one who steps up; a minor annoyance becomes a major concern, and then comes the overly dramatic finale. Life span usually under the six months mark.

    Option Two
    ENFP and ENTP meet they enjoy each other’s company and hop on board the casual relationship express, at some point they both release that this isn’t enough for either of them and split amicably. Life span of relationship ending within twelve months.

    Option Three
    This is a combination of option one and option two; It starts of as option one, it then proceeds to a pregnancy, it usually starts with a few tumultuous years, until it quiets down to being more like option two, and then ends with an amicable split. Life span will probably be under the decade mark.

    Which is not to say your ex is not an ENTP, but the pattern of ENFP and ENTP relationships which is remarkably formulaic, combined with behaviours that are not something I would associate with ENTP’s; Occum’s Razor would say that you are more than likely barking up the wrong tree.
    It was very much like the first scenario, actually. That is such a concise and well-put explanation of what happened. I was ready to "grow up" and the more he refused like made me feel bad for wanting that or for the choices I was making, the more I felt he just couldn't be who I needed him to be.

    I didn't include that because I thought it was just an age thing (we were in our early 20s). We just got to enjoy being kids together and being wildly in love with our party responsibility-free life for a few good years before reality set in.
    You hem me in -- behind and before;
    you have laid your hand upon me.
    Such knowledge is too wonderful for me,
    too lofty for me to attain.

  8. #28
    Chaser of Light Dr Mobius's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    MBTI
    ENTP
    Enneagram
    7w8 sp/sx
    Posts
    815

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by nicolita View Post
    It was very much like the first scenario, actually. That is such a concise and well-put explanation of what happened. I was ready to "grow up" and the more he refused like made me feel bad for wanting that or for the choices I was making, the more I felt he just couldn't be who I needed him to be.

    I didn't include that because I thought it was just an age thing (we were in our early 20s). We just got to enjoy being kids together and being wildly in love with our party responsibility-free life for a few good years before reality set in.
    Yes and no, the whole falling for someone who is so similar and gets me is I imagine a pretty common phenomenon, but the way it falls apart seems to be a distinctly Pe dominant issue (I imagine that ESXPs face similar situations.). I am also not entirely convinced that age begets wisdom necessarily, especially when it comes to ENXPs.

    Anyway did you want me to have a go at analysing your ex’s actions, from an ENTP perspective? I assume he is the standard model ENTP enneagram 7 sx/sp/so?
    “Brighter, now brighter, pay no mind to those who squint, burn with all your heat.”

  9. #29
    Buddhist Misanthrope Samvega's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2007
    MBTI
    ENTP
    Enneagram
    7w8
    Posts
    1,068

    Default

    I don't think E/E or I/I relationships work well at all, I could never date a fellow extrovert, I've shared some intense bonds and connections with them but there's no way I could sustain the dynamic long term. I really like an ENFP once, she liked me, we clicked really well but we never went beyond a friendship because we were so alike. If I had to date a fellow extrovert I don't even know what I'd pick, either ESFJ so that I have somebody to take care of me or ENTP so that it's at lease super comfortable and I know I'll get enough me time without it being taken personally.

  10. #30
    Senior Member sculpting's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    Posts
    4,226

    Default

    I tried to date ENTPs for awhile-I totally love talking with them and understanding how they think. My best friends for many years have been entp girls.

    However when I tried to date them, it was just strange. I think they saw me as entp-like, as I loved to argue and debate with them and am not at all sensitive, but then when I acted like an enfp in the context of the relationship, they were dumbfounded and it almost immediately dissolved.

    I have seen several older divorced couples who had kids, but later broke up-interestingly it isnt the Ti/Fi issue so much but more the tert Fe/Te that can be extremely grating as both are so immature and partially unconscious functions that we start extroverting on the other as we both try and grow up a little.

    But they make AWESOME friends.

Similar Threads

  1. [ENFP] Thoughts on an ENFP and ENxP relationship?
    By liesl16 in forum The NF Idyllic (ENFP, INFP, ENFJ, INFJ)
    Replies: 9
    Last Post: 06-23-2016, 01:52 AM
  2. [ENTP] What are the differences between ENFP and ENTP?
    By Necobellator in forum The NT Rationale (ENTP, INTP, ENTJ, INTJ)
    Replies: 7
    Last Post: 02-25-2016, 02:01 AM
  3. [ENFP] ENFP and INFP relationship
    By Lotr246 in forum The NF Idyllic (ENFP, INFP, ENFJ, INFJ)
    Replies: 20
    Last Post: 04-29-2013, 03:35 PM
  4. [Si] Inferior Si in ENFPs and ENTPs
    By Fuent in forum The NF Idyllic (ENFP, INFP, ENFJ, INFJ)
    Replies: 12
    Last Post: 09-13-2008, 05:17 PM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
Single Sign On provided by vBSSO