I know it's an INFP thing to consistently put yourself down, but has it ever happened to a point where, you don't even trust yourself on what you truly feel about things? Like this one time, in one of my advanced English classes, I had my teacher fully put down this narrative which was supposed to be centered on a past 'love'. I chose to write about the last days my grandma was alive, before she died of brain cancer.
I had a strong idea in my head of expressing what I felt and what I still feel, but i couldn't get around to making the paper i wrote, like I couldn't even express myself properly the one way I could only really ever express myself. Just to back myself up, I thought to myself that, "i was the only one who would possibly think that", and told myself it's just part of who I am to second-guess almost everything I did.
I handed it up as it was, and I thought of it as something I put at least some heart into writing, and that I would probably still do as good as I did on the other papers I handed up. Though when she corrected it and announced all its, as she called it "poor" repetitive mistakes, i noticed that that feeling was mutual. I think I got the lowest grade on that paper than any other one that semester, and I got an A for everything else. The others weren't as personal I reckon.
My point is, are there INFPs, who have the problem of not being able to express themselves when it comes to their own personal experiences. I know I can never ever pull off confrontations, to the idealistic one I have floating around in my head. But can this attitude actually extend to how you express your own deep seated emotions? or past experiences?
I mean even this, is a quiet off my radar of how I really feel, or how I would have really wanted to express myself. Like my writing just gets too confusing to understand overall.