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  1. #21
    this is my winter song EJCC's Avatar
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    For the record, I actually relate a lot to the OP, as well as everything that people have been describing about INFPs. Regarding the exact word choice of the thread title, I relate to the concept of being an "outsider to emotion", as well, not just in the sense of "I don't know how to describe this without it sounding tacky/cliched/fake", but also in the sense of not knowing how I feel about particular subjects. Especially if it's a painful/uncomfortable subject, because I won't want to spend the amount of emotional energy on it, that would allow for complete understanding of my stance on it. I did that even more when I was younger, I think.

    So, because I relate so much -- it might be an Fi thing, more than an NF thing.
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    EJCC: "The Big Questions in my life right now: 1) What am I willing to live with? 2) What do I have to live with? 3) What can I change for the better?"
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  2. #22
    Senior Member flameskull95's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by UniqueMixture View Post
    It just seems like you're going into repeating thought cycles and spinning off into crazy. Do some relaxation excercises be proactive and don't overthink/feel that stuff. Be proud of yourself if you're doing the best you can.
    This is actually a big problem I have and it resonates around my friends as well. I'm trying really hard to find a way to do 'my best'... other than that, what do you expect telling an INFP to not 'overthink' or 'feel' that stuff?
    I'm a INFP - The sociopath

    I think I'm either a 4w5, 4w3, 6w5 or 9w1. Most possibly 4w5.

    Feeling FiNe

  3. #23
    Senior Member flameskull95's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by EJCC View Post
    For the record, I actually relate a lot to the OP, as well as everything that people have been describing about INFPs. Regarding the exact word choice of the thread title, I relate to the concept of being an "outsider to emotion", as well, not just in the sense of "I don't know how to describe this without it sounding tacky/cliched/fake", but also in the sense of not knowing how I feel about particular subjects. Especially if it's a painful/uncomfortable subject, because I won't want to spend the amount of emotional energy on it, that would allow for complete understanding of my stance on it. I did that even more when I was younger, I think.

    So, because I relate so much -- it might be an Fi thing, more than an NF thing.
    That's really interesting.... it just may be an Fi thing then...
    It's great to know it's not just an INFP thing nonetheless.
    I'm a INFP - The sociopath

    I think I'm either a 4w5, 4w3, 6w5 or 9w1. Most possibly 4w5.

    Feeling FiNe

  4. #24
    Senior Member flameskull95's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by skylights View Post
    The deeper emotions are, the longer it takes me to process them, much less outwardly express them in a formal setting. I didn't really feel sadness right after my grandpa died - just endless hollowness. I was stone-faced through the funeral and only really began mourning months later. Now it's been years and I feel deeply, genuinely sad. I began to write a story about it in college but I had too hard of a time expressing such a personal thing, so I morphed it into a semi-autobiographical story, a sort of creative non-fiction piece. I understand what you mean - it was too much of me, too deep to be able to accurately depict on paper.
    To be honest, I actually didn't feel that type of sadness that would have distilled tears either. Not to say I didn't cry. It was just as you described... a deep stone 'hollowness'. And it made me feel really bad, like I didn't really care... but I did... so much.

    I can relate. It's so strange how I can relate to ENFPs so much. I just have this feeling that I used to be an ENFP and still happen to share a lot with ENFPs, like an introverted ENFP or something.... I think this because I also happen to think I used to be some sort of kid ENFP (literally like the 'life of the party' kind), just before slowly turning into an INFP... with more experience along with the harsher realities of life.
    I'm a INFP - The sociopath

    I think I'm either a 4w5, 4w3, 6w5 or 9w1. Most possibly 4w5.

    Feeling FiNe

  5. #25
    Senior Member UniqueMixture's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by flameskull95 View Post
    This is actually a big problem I have and it resonates around my friends as well. I'm trying really hard to find a way to do 'my best'... other than that, what do you expect telling an INFP to not 'overthink' or 'feel' that stuff?
    Maybe instead of thinking of it as a part of your identity it would be more useful to you to think of it as resulting at least in part from other patterns within your life. If you stabilize those aspects of your life, it may help you to be more fulfilled. Perhaps you should look at proper nutrition, sleep, exercise, time management, and relaxation techniques like meditation or calming music.
    For all that we have done, as a civilization, as individuals, the universe is not stable, and nor is any single thing within it. Stars consume themselves, the universe itself rushes apart, and we ourselves are composed of matter in constant flux. Colonies of cells in temporary alliance, replicating and decaying and housed within, an incandescent cloud of electrical impulses. This is reality, this is self knowledge, and the perception of it will, of course, make you dizzy.

  6. #26
    Senior Member flameskull95's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by UniqueMixture View Post
    Maybe instead of thinking of it as a part of your identity it would be more useful to you to think of it as resulting at least in part from other patterns within your life. If you stabilize those aspects of your life, it may help you to be more fulfilled. Perhaps you should look at proper nutrition, sleep, exercise, time management, and relaxation techniques like meditation or calming music.
    All I can say is I'll try. Thanks for that nonetheless your intentions are good.

    Other than that, It's funny because I have an ENFP sister.... she told me the other day that I'm way too connected to my own identity. Like I act on 'how I should be acting' and make stupid mistakes, instead of telling myself to pay attention to the situation itself. The solution she suggested was to just take things in and forget about doing them as perfectly, ideally as expected in my head.. I guess that's why ENFPs have Ne before Fi, and INFPs have Fi before Ne. So I'll try... but it's gonna be hard because that's very much inbuilt. This makes me question whether I'm an ISFP or not. But I guess questioning the possibilities is an INFP thing. :/
    I'm a INFP - The sociopath

    I think I'm either a 4w5, 4w3, 6w5 or 9w1. Most possibly 4w5.

    Feeling FiNe

  7. #27
    Senior Member UniqueMixture's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by flameskull95 View Post
    All I can say is I'll try. Thanks for that nonetheless your intentions are good.

    Other than that, It's funny because I have an ENFP sister.... she told me the other day that I'm way too connected to my own identity. Like I act on 'how I should be acting' and make stupid mistakes, instead of telling myself to pay attention to the situation itself. The solution she suggested was to just take things in and forget about doing them as perfectly, ideally as expected in my head.. I guess that's why ENFPs have Ne before Fi, and INFPs have Fi before Ne. So I'll try... but it's gonna be hard because that's very much inbuilt. This makes me question whether I'm an ISFP or not. But I guess questioning the possibilities is an INFP thing. :/
    I think the mistake that a lot of introverts make is that they take life events as a reflection of themselves. What I mean by this, is that they think a negative consequence means something about THEM. Sometimes, it's just life. It has nothing to do with you per se. If you realize that and go a bit easier on yourself and say, "Hey, I'm not really so special (hard for infps I know haha) it's just stuff." It gives you the space to move forward and helps you focus on the action you can take (that ANYONE in that situation could take) to make things better and relieve the stress.
    For all that we have done, as a civilization, as individuals, the universe is not stable, and nor is any single thing within it. Stars consume themselves, the universe itself rushes apart, and we ourselves are composed of matter in constant flux. Colonies of cells in temporary alliance, replicating and decaying and housed within, an incandescent cloud of electrical impulses. This is reality, this is self knowledge, and the perception of it will, of course, make you dizzy.

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