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Thread: INFJ and Ni doms, how do you make decisions?

  1. #21
    Iron Maiden Array fidelia's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2009
    1w2 so/sx


    Yeah, this describes it exactly. I just hate trying to describe to other people that it will happen but I can't explain when exactly or how I'll know for sure. I think that some of it is deadline inspired for me (at least I seem to be able to make deadlines when I need to). However, artificially creating deadlines for myself doesn't seem to do the trick.

    My mother is 68 and I can't keep up with all the work that she does. I feel kind of slow moving and lazy in comparison. If she decides something needs to be done, it will be done that day, no matter what obstacles are in the way!

    I don't sit around waffling about whether to eat eggs for breakfast, nor do I have trouble being decisive about what kind of shampoo I'm gonna get. Packing is more enjoying the luxury of being able to change my mind until I have to get down to it and actually get it done, but I never have any doubt that it is easily doable.

    It's just the bigger decisions that seem to become more and more protracted. I wonder if there's some Ni-Ti looping that sometimes happens too which slows the whole process down. It mostly happens to me when there are no restrictions on the possibilities. For example, right now I have saved enough money to buy any car that I think I would reasonably need (not a luxury car or a sports car, but a mid-sized car that fits my needs). I could get it wherever I want, and at whatever time I want (right now I don't have huge need of a car for work or daily living, but would like to have my own so I have more options and am not depending on someone else - however there's no specific time deadline). It would help me to be restricted to buying it within a particular timeframe, in a certain region or only from among a couple of makes/models/years.

    Similarly, there are no restrictions on where I could live and work. I'm not in debt, I don't own a house, and I have some money saved. I have a variety of skills and am considering even a change in career path to include something outside of a standard posted teaching position. There's no time deadline on me as I have more than enough work if I want to stay doing what I'm doing. I am sharing a large house with my folks and have very few expenses and we have a pretty symbiotic relationship. Therefore, if I want to decide where I want to be in five years, it seems like a decision that just has too broad of possibilities.

    I'm wondering if there's a way to speed up the decision-making process or narrow things down in a way that still feels okay to my Ni.

  2. #22
    On a mission Array Usehername's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2007


    I was or am remarkably bad with paper filing, packing, and clothing organization decisions. Owning a shredder and slowly getting rid of stuff has helped with the first, I haven't gotten better at the second yet, and having a large walk-in closet has solved the third for me.

    I have been focusing on density as a concept to help with my procrastination. If my stuff isn't high-density value, I'm wasting resources on it. So I'm slowly becoming my own version of a minimalist, though I still have a lot of stuff.
    *You don't have a soul. You are a Soul. You have a body.
    *Faith is the art of holding on to things your reason once accepted, despite your changing moods.
    C.S. Lewis

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