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Thread: ENFP: Darkness

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    Junior Member disco's Avatar
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    Default ENFP: Darkness

    Any ENFPs get asked if they're mad a lot? People are always asking me if I'm okay, and I'm always totally fine. I think my face looks unhappy by default and if I'm just chillin, observing a room, people will think I'm upset, but I'm not. Sometimes I feel like my energy is darker than others, even though I'm ultimately optimistic, spontaneous, fun-loving, excitable, etc...
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    Certified Sausage Smoker Elfboy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by disco View Post
    Any ENFPs get asked if they're mad a lot? People are always asking me if I'm okay, and I'm always totally fine. I think my face looks unhappy by default and if I'm just chillin, observing a room, people will think I'm upset, but I'm not. Sometimes I feel like my energy is darker than others, even though I'm ultimately optimistic, spontaneous, fun-loving, excitable, etc...
    this is perfectly normal for an ENFP.
    we're
    - 1 part lovable, goofy, random and social butterfly
    - 1 part dark, dramatic, intense, convicted, passionately sexual

    your tritype is also triple idealist (7, 4 and 1) and you are an Sx dom. this is going to add to your dark energy even more
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    Lay the coin on my tongue SilkRoad's Avatar
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    I know two people who I suspect are both ENFP, though they could also be outgoing (or in one case, aggressive) INFPs. Really can't quite make up my mind with either.

    One of them is almost certainly mentally ill (possibly quite seriously, ie. BPD or something similar) so not such a good example, really. But she looks angry almost all the time and acts angry a lot of the time - and claims not to have a clue that she's coming across this way.

    The other one suffers from some emotional instability but is otherwise ok. She doesn't tend to "look angry" as a default but she certainly comes across as intense, and I suppose that could some of the time look like serious/angry. My own face, for instance, might tend to look serious (or sometimes sad, but I got told that more when younger) as a default, but I'm a bit more impassive, I think, though my face and tone can be pretty expressive. She certainly gets angry quicker than I do, but also gets over it quicker.

    Oh, and I am pretty sure she'd agree with you @disco about the "darker energy" thing. She's a quintessential type 4, and has always leaned towards goth style and that sort of thing, and does tend to gravitate to situations and people which/who are dark, tragic and drama-laden.
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    i love skylights's Avatar
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    People who don't know me very well sometimes get concerned when I'm not all smiley-cute, because they've only seen my outer positive layer and don't get to see the constant inside serious-intense-complex vortex that Elfboy described. It frustrates me a little that they assume that my darker side is somehow not me - in many ways it's more me than the happy-go-lucky exterior.

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    Senior Member Turtledove's Avatar
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    Some people are just naturally brooders that are intense inside there heads. I try not to misjudge the facial expressions of people who look intense.
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    Junior Member disco's Avatar
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    Great replies, everyone...thanks! I actually second-guessed my 7 and thought I was possibly a 4 for a while, but the essential problems of a 7 are what keep me convinced I am one. I do feel almost split between 7 and 4, though...
    ♕ ENFP ♡ 7w6 sx/sp ♕

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    Senior Member sculpting's Avatar
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    when I was younger I had an INFJ teacher explain that I had a very bad attitude. It confused me a great deal as I was extremely quiet and introverted and I didnt say anything to her or anyone else in the class. I made very good grades in her class and did all of my work. She said I just looked like I had a bad attitude and should be less bitter.

    I suspect that maybe our game face can be very serious and that when we dont feel comfortable engaging externally, we can sort of put on a solemn face and just keep to ourselves-which people misread as anger or bitterness. I have also noted EXTPs who think I am bitter when I am really just thinking about stuff-I suspect they are projecting their own state upon me, and seeing a lack of Fe, they assume I am externalizing Ti-thus cranky-bitter-argumentative perhaps... hmm, this could have been the INFJ teacher too-that would make sense.

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    Post Human Post Qlip's Avatar
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    I spent my short highschool career brooding alone in corners. I was badly depressed. People thought I was some sort of anarchist, or some kind of odd Muslim charismatic (there's a strange explanation for that). I was approached by very strange people.

    As an adult I get into bad moods, I feel as if I'm radiating pure darkness. I don't know what I look like from the outside, though.

  9. #9
    i love skylights's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Orobas View Post
    when I was younger I had an INFJ teacher explain that I had a very bad attitude. It confused me a great deal as I was extremely quiet and introverted and I didnt say anything to her or anyone else in the class. I made very good grades in her class and did all of my work. She said I just looked like I had a bad attitude and should be less bitter.

    I suspect that maybe our game face can be very serious and that when we dont feel comfortable engaging externally, we can sort of put on a solemn face and just keep to ourselves-which people misread as anger or bitterness. I have also noted EXTPs who think I am bitter when I am really just thinking about stuff-I suspect they are projecting their own state upon me, and seeing a lack of Fe, they assume I am externalizing Ti-thus cranky-bitter-argumentative perhaps... hmm, this could have been the INFJ teacher too-that would make sense.
    Interesting... I really like most of the INFJs I talk to on this site but I have neeeeever gotten along with (who I suspect to be) INFJ teachers, minus one 9w1 male when I was in my senior year of college... I've had 3 very similar female teachers who I very much think were INFJ - all petite brunette kinda uptight looking young women - 2 psychology professors and 1 middle school teacher - who always seemed to regard me as a "problem" despite getting high grades... they always treated me with disdain even though I tried to really engage in their classes... never really understood it...

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    Senior Member Chiharu's Avatar
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    I think it's the Fi. Most Fi users look a little dark and moody, where Fe users are more smiley/pleasant/neutral ime.
    Be soft. Do not let the world make you hard. Do not let pain make you hate. Do not let the bitterness steal your sweetness." ― Kurt Vonnegut

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