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Thread: ENFP: Commitment, Bigger Better Deal, Details, Infatuation

  1. #1
    Junior Member Array disco's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2011
    7w6 sx/sp

    Default ENFP: Commitment, Bigger Better Deal, Details, Infatuation

    I'm curious what other ENFPs (or others) have to say about this...

    1.) I am unable to commit to anything. I've never kept the same job for longer than one year, and the only thing I finally came to feel comfortable doing for the foreseeable future is working on cruise ships, and I think that was largely due to the satisfying relationships I had on my most recent contract, as well as the variety of travel, which keeps things from getting stale.

    2.) I can't stop looking for the Bigger Better Deal. I'm in a perpetual future fantasyland, visualizing possibilities and neglecting realities. I can't seem to reconcile my ideals with reality, and this leads me to trouble all the time! I've burned bridges because I assumed something much better was around the corner, etc.

    3.) Daily maintenance details, chores and general unpleasantness are extremely hard for me. To people who are better about this kind of stuff, I may appear immature or simply lacking hard work ethic. But, I swear it takes an incredible amount of effort for me to keep up in this's disheartening and definitely makes me feel bad about myself! I've made marginal improvements, but overall it still ultimately cripples me because I end up in financial trouble, a messy home with piles of laundry, unpaid parking tickets, etc.

    4.) I become infatuated with men I'm attracted to. Not to say that I'm creepy about it, or controlling or any of that nonsense. I just will definitely put the apple of my eye above all else. I like to think of myself as a strong, independent woman (and I am), but the reality is that my relationships are always #1. I think about them day and night and will sacrifice all else to be with them. This does interfere with other areas of my life, as I end up spending the majority of my energy on the relationship. For example, I want to take a trip to see a guy (mutual interest and some extremely brief romantic history) who lives very far away because I feel strongly that the relationship is worth pursuing, but I can't afford it at the moment (and it's his busy season with work so he can't travel here) and I'm likely to be on a ship again soon (which is why it feels more urgent now). I was seriously considering taking out another credit card solely to ensure that I could make this happen... To me, that makes sense because relationships are more important to me than career or stability, but I do know deep down that it's generally a bad idea...

    Yikes, guys! Am I a crazy person? Or do some of you relate to these things?
    ♕ ENFP ♡ 7w6 sx/sp ♕

  2. #2
    Senior Member Array Chiharu's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2011
    7w6 sx/so
    ENFp None


    I can definitely relate! I always look out for better things, have a hard time being responsible, take risks, and fall in love quickly.

    I would advise you against taking out another credit card. Please please please don't do that to yourself.

    I think being a 7w6 compounds the NFP flightiness for you. I have a 7 in my tritype.
    Be soft. Do not let the world make you hard. Do not let pain make you hate. Do not let the bitterness steal your sweetness." ― Kurt Vonnegut

    ENFP. 7w6 – 4w3 – 1w9 sx/so. Aries. Dilettante. Overly anxious optimist.

  3. #3
    Unlimited Dancemoves ® Array AgentF's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2010
    7w6 sx/so


    Quote Originally Posted by Proximo
    Spaniard, we shall go to Rome together and have bloody adventures. And the great whore will suckle us until we are fat and happy and can suckle no more. And then, when enough men have died, perhaps you will have your freedom.
    hi @disco.

    i say follow your nature. do it all. you are likely to do most of it, anyway.

    and the mistakes you made will be a source of great pain and great knowledge, and when you are ready you will domesticate yourself; you will no longer be a slave to your nature...

    i could say more, but the most important thing is to keep asking questions. internally and externally...go deeper with them and more granular: you will find yourself somewhere in those details. this is especially important for a 7w6.

    I may be kindly, I am ordinarily gentle, but in my line of business I am obliged to will terribly what I will at all.
    ~ Catherine the Great

    7w6 ❣ sx/so ❤ physical touch ❥ sanguine 70%, choleric 30% ❦


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