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  1. #11
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    Quote Originally Posted by sakuraba View Post
    Are NF's loyal? IME... No. They are flighty. Never have their priorities straight. For people who are so "people-orientated" a lot of them dont have many close friends.

    IME Sp and Sj are far more loyal. Sticking with their true friends when they most need them. NFs are so wrapped up in themselves. I think they are the most selfish people out there. Ever talk to an NF on the phone? Garauntee the conversation will always find a way back to the NF's favorite topic.... themself.

    However, NF's are prone to the "holding onto a shitty relationship way too long" syndrome. Could that even be considered loyal? It seems like something else to me. Neediness, clinginess. Not loyalty.


    They're also hypocrites. Will leech onto you and depend on you for everything. For emotional stability. For friendship. Will want to share their whole life with you. They want to tell you all their problems. But as soon as you need them for something, it's never as important as when THEY have a problem.

    These are the type of people... You could save their life one day. And they next day they would end your friendship because they need to "find themself and start over".
    I have a lot of close friends. While I stayed in town after high school, all my friends went East Coast and are now in Europe studying abroad. When we see each other during the summer and winter breaks, we hang out and it's always like we never didn't see each other. We talk probably every month to catch up. We are still close friends after 9 years.

    As for being selfish, I don't really think you can classify ALL NFs as being selfish. When I had my first job I donated 80% of my paychecks to charity(I was living at home). I always give to the homeless. If someone ever drops anything I am the first person on the ground picking up their item. If I'm ever on the phone(I hate the phone much rather talk in person), I am never talking about myself. I am always stimulating conversation by asking the person about themselves or what's going on with them. I'm much interested in what other people have to say than me speaking about my own thoughts or feelings.

    Yes I DID have the stay in a bad relationship syndrome, but I would call it clingyness. The reason I stayed in the relationship is because I knew she would cry and flip and throw a tantrum if I ended it, and I figured at the cost my slight unhappiness, I could bring her joy. Everyone said I was the one getting abused in the relationship and how weird she was, but no way I could try to hurt her.

    As for relationships. I have only had 1 real girlfriend because since I can remember, I have always been looking for a girl that I know has potential to be the one I want to marry and spend the rest of my life with. I have no potential to be a cheater, and would always be faithful. I pretty much take everything serious such as kissing and above that. I'm a pretty loyal NF guy.

    I never lean on anyone, and I never ask for anything, ever. I don't lean on anyone for emotional stability or friendship. All my friends and co-workers come to me for advice cause I'm usually good with it(sorry not being conceited). It's rarely my going out to tell people about my problems mainly cause I'd feel that most people don't want to hear it(weird).

    So I really have no clue what you're talking about. I don't think all NFs are how you described. Maybe they lied.

  2. #12
    The Black Knight Domino's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by sakuraba View Post
    Are NF's loyal? IME... No. They are flighty. Never have their priorities straight. For people who are so "people-orientated" a lot of them dont have many close friends.

    IME Sp and Sj are far more loyal. Sticking with their true friends when they most need them. NFs are so wrapped up in themselves. I think they are the most selfish people out there. Ever talk to an NF on the phone? Garauntee the conversation will always find a way back to the NF's favorite topic.... themself.

    However, NF's are prone to the "holding onto a shitty relationship way too long" syndrome. Could that even be considered loyal? It seems like something else to me. Neediness, clinginess. Not loyalty.


    They're also hypocrites. Will leech onto you and depend on you for everything. For emotional stability. For friendship. Will want to share their whole life with you. They want to tell you all their problems. But as soon as you need them for something, it's never as important as when THEY have a problem.

    These are the type of people... You could save their life one day. And they next day they would end your friendship because they need to "find themself and start over".

    Oh please. Any type can be self-centered. They all have their own way of jumping the shark. And who doesn't stay with someone they think they love and want to help? All are guilty of that at some point.

    When both my ENTPs left, I cried for MONTHS. I don't go half-way. I'm a lifer and they totally gutted me. I don't get the inconstancy. AT ALL.

    If NFs are flakes, NTs are heartless. (Not that I believe either bitter assertion as truth whatsoever).
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  3. #13

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    These are the type of people... You could save their life one day. And they next day they would end your friendnship because they need to "find themself and start over".
    That sucks. I'm sorry if your friend(s) did this to you. Perhaps, you should bluntly explain to them how you feel... nothing bothers an NF more than realizing their actions were unjust.
    Introverted (I) 57.14% Extroverted (E) 42.86%
    Intuitive (N) 66.67% Sensing (S) 33.33%
    Feeling (F) 61.54% Thinking (T) 38.46%
    Judging (J) 51.22% Perceiving (P) 48.78%

    Your type is: INFJ

  4. #14
    Member milti girl's Avatar
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    This rant about NFs sounded very NF to me
    I 78% N 62% F 62% P 67%
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  5. #15
    Striving for balance Little Linguist's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by sakuraba View Post
    Are NF's loyal? IME... No. They are flighty. Never have their priorities straight. For people who are so "people-orientated" a lot of them dont have many close friends.

    IME Sp and Sj are far more loyal. Sticking with their true friends when they most need them. NFs are so wrapped up in themselves. I think they are the most selfish people out there. Ever talk to an NF on the phone? Garauntee the conversation will always find a way back to the NF's favorite topic.... themself.

    However, NF's are prone to the "holding onto a shitty relationship way too long" syndrome. Could that even be considered loyal? It seems like something else to me. Neediness, clinginess. Not loyalty.


    They're also hypocrites. Will leech onto you and depend on you for everything. For emotional stability. For friendship. Will want to share their whole life with you. They want to tell you all their problems. But as soon as you need them for something, it's never as important as when THEY have a problem.

    These are the type of people... You could save their life one day. And they next day they would end your friendship because they need to "find themself and start over".
    Fart, and you'll feel better. Trust me.
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  6. #16
    Senior Member Anja's Avatar
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    sakuraba, maybe you are hanging out with unhealthy NFs? We can be hell on wheels if we aren't balanced out.

    I take my time in picking life-long friends and I keep them. Except for three who were foisted on me in kindergarten - a minister, a missionary and a farmer/truck driver. A motley crew indeed, and we've been tight for fifty-five years.

    And I was none too healthy nor developed an INFP for decades. Guess they were the tolerant ones in this case.

    My point being that friendships take discernment and effort to last.

    In those cases of my old friends apparently they discerned I was worth hanging on to!

    It also depends on what you mean by loyalty. In popular culture that could mean different things to different people. If it's about "things" then that focus can be shaky with anyone.
    "No ray of sunshine is ever lost, but the green which it awakes into existence needs time to sprout, and it is not always granted to the sower to see the harvest. All work that is worth anything is done in faith." - Albert Schweitzer

  7. #17
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    I am fully aware I won't get any brownie points for saying this, so please note my reckless disregard for my own social status.

    The OP makes a degree of sense. In my observations, NFs, moreso than NT, SJ, and SP, are capable of justifying whatever they do, whether the actions are impulsive or premeditated. The strong tendency to trust Feeling coupled with the lack of respect for convention can lead NFs to follow whatever whims please them, and still believe their righteousness to be consistently impeccable.

  8. #18
    Senior Member Anja's Avatar
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    Amen. I've seen it, Jack. Not a pretty sight. Self-destruction in progress.

    When NFs "go bad" they are indeed hell's own angels. Crafty little souls.

    When it comes to making friends with them it's a matter of learning how to spot 'em. Yeah?
    "No ray of sunshine is ever lost, but the green which it awakes into existence needs time to sprout, and it is not always granted to the sower to see the harvest. All work that is worth anything is done in faith." - Albert Schweitzer

  9. #19
    Senior Member Lateralus's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jack Flak View Post
    The OP makes a degree of sense. In my observations, NFs, moreso than NT, SJ, and SP, are capable of justifying whatever they do, whether the actions are impulsive or premeditated. The strong tendency to trust Feeling coupled with the lack of respect for convention can lead NFs to follow whatever whims please them, and still believe their righteousness to be consistently impeccable.
    You can construct arguments describing how all temperaments could behave that way. I thought MBTI was about information gathering and processing, not behavior.
    "We grow up thinking that beliefs are something to be proud of, but they're really nothing but opinions one refuses to reconsider. Beliefs are easy. The stronger your beliefs are, the less open you are to growth and wisdom, because "strength of belief" is only the intensity with which you resist questioning yourself. As soon as you are proud of a belief, as soon as you think it adds something to who you are, then you've made it a part of your ego."

  10. #20
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lateralus View Post
    You can construct arguments describing how all temperaments could act that way.
    Of course I could, and exceptionally well. But it doesn't match my observations, so it wouldn't please me to do so: Big difference between INTP and ENTJ.

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