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[ENFJ] single ENFJ women

ExAstrisSpes

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Interesting. Maybe that's part of the reason why the ENFJ+INTP combo is so common.

Possibly, until the ENFJ in question gets sick of that sort of relationship or decides the ENFJ deserves better.
 

Zhuli Lily Askar

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Well maybe as you get older she'll be more inclined to indulge you in your interest, but I wouldn't hold onto that.
If she doesn't want to get close to you, she won't. I can see why you find an ENFJ/personality such as hers intriguing, I find ENFJ types intriguing also, dunno why - because half the time they also seem to annoy the shit out of me. That's after I get close to them though, I guess I get too comfortable and expect too much. :shrug:
I don't think she is exactly being judgemental, just trying to be appropriate, and she was also a teenager once, common sense says to not trust a student with too much. She sounds like ENFJ's I know.

Maybe she was the kind of teenager you couldn't trust and grew out of it. But that really doesn't mean all of us...
 

Joehobo

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Maybe she was the kind of teenager you couldn't trust and grew out of it. But that really doesn't mean all of us...

Who knows? Maybe, but she certainly is going to keep her boundaries as she sees fit, which is what you'll have to keep dealing with.
 

Zhuli Lily Askar

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Who knows? Maybe, but she certainly is going to keep her boundaries as she sees fit, which is what you'll have to keep dealing with.

I'm not so sure. I've already broken through a lot of it through my techniques. Also, I'll graduate and never see her much anymore. I want her as a friend! Even though she's like 40... I envy those kids who come back from college to visit sometimes and they discuss reunions and stuff. She trusts me like she trusts them. (well I'm not sure if it's just me or she'd be like that with everyone, well no I'm being pessimistic now.) But I want..... ! She's cool.
 

Joehobo

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I'm not so sure. I've already broken through a lot of it through my techniques. Also, I'll graduate and never see her much anymore. I want her as a friend! Even though she's like 40... I envy those kids who come back from college to visit sometimes and they discuss reunions and stuff. She trusts me like she trusts them. (well I'm not sure if it's just me or she'd be like that with everyone, well no I'm being pessimistic now.) But I want..... ! She's cool.

Trickster INTJ oh you. Hm yeah that is pretty harmless, and if she maintains a connection with her previous students, and does treat you the same as them. Then I guess you're already in the position you want to be? Don't be worrying buddy
 
G

Glycerine

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I'm not so sure. I've already broken through a lot of it through my techniques. Also, I'll graduate and never see her much anymore. I want her as a friend! Even though she's like 40... I envy those kids who come back from college to visit sometimes and they discuss reunions and stuff. She trusts me like she trusts them. (well I'm not sure if it's just me or she'd be like that with everyone, well no I'm being pessimistic now.) But I want..... ! She's cool.
if she likes you well enough, she will be somewhat casual. Formal niceness indicates neutrality or dislike esp. with EXFJs.
 

Zhuli Lily Askar

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Trickster INTJ oh you. Hm yeah that is pretty harmless, and if she maintains a connection with her previous students, and does treat you the same as them. Then I guess you're already in the position you want to be? Don't be worrying buddy

I don't know if she is connecting or pretending to connect. Sometimes what I don't like about her is that she has the ability to just take in what she wants with someone and simply says things to get more out of the person without offending them, she does this on the basis that she isn't actually hurting them but it is insulting. But then her craziness and selflessness towards doing so much for the good of the greater population regardless of how tired she is....stops you. And than she's interesting. I think she is an ENFJ type 3. She likes professionals, and learning about new cultures. Our school has a lot of Asians, she has taken a liking to us as she just went to work in China over the summer. Did I forget to say she's a history teacher? Anyways I showed off, offered anything about myself. Complimented her but I was being completely honest and it wasn't for the purpose of getting her to open up, not that I'm not happy that she did. I enjoyed talking with her and trusted her and got in the moment with her. Even though I had issues with her earlier in the year. It's rare for someone to actually get to the real me, and she did it so smoothly, especially after I hated her.

I wanna crack all the boundaries! I wanna go somewhere with her, introduce to others that she'd be happy to meet. I wanna learn from and about her and the year is ending and than I won't be in her class and she doesn't even have time for me when I am her student. She teaches a class I am taking next year. I want her, no picking teachers. This is shitty.
 
G

Glycerine

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Describe this casualty a bit more.

They will crack jokes, give you a hard time, seem to enjoy your presence (within bounds)... show a little more enthusiasm... it won't be quite so controlled and stiff.

I had an ENFJ prof who liked to give me a hard time, whack me with a newspaper/book playfully occasionally. I just ran into him today and he called me by my last name and for the most part, he would call me by my first name. "____, didn't expect to see you here... stop by my office sometime."

I think it's safe to say that he likes me well enough but we are NOT friends by any means.

EDIT: it was a male prof... don't know if that makes a difference.

I am kinda the same way, female ENFJ.
 

Zhuli Lily Askar

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They will crack jokes, give you a hard time, seem to enjoy your presence (within bounds)... show a little more enthusiasm... it won't be quite so controlled and stiff.

I had an ENFJ prof who liked to give me a hard time, whack me with a newspaper/book playfully occasionally. I just ran into him today and he called me by my last name and for the most part, he would call me by my first name. "____, didn't expect to see you here... stop by my office sometime."

I think it's safe to say that he likes me well enough but we are NOT friends by any means.

EDIT: it was a male prof... don't know if that makes a difference.

I am kinda the same way, female ENFJ.

But she didn't actually do that. I just know when nobody is in the room she is different with me, it's just....not that much. She calls me Miss Lily sometimes. I think something is restraining her that's not me. It's the environment. Or maybe with students all together because she doesn't trust teenagers. She doesn't send me outside very often when she needs to talk with others. She puts her hand on my shoulder sometimes and gives me smiley looks. Warm expression in the eyes and it seems to be there but less with other students.....EW This makes me feel disgusting. Like I want to fish for favoritism. I don't like it...but I want her to like me!

....

I think the slapstick is more with ENFPs no? My ENFP teacher who loves me always smacks me with stuff more than others. ==" But then again she pokes other people sometimes too.
 
G

Glycerine

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But she didn't actually do that. I just know when nobody is in the room she is different with me, it's just....not that much. She calls me Miss Lily sometimes. I think something is restraining her that's not me. It's the environment. Or maybe with students all together because she doesn't trust teenagers. She doesn't send me outside very often when she needs to talk with others. She puts her hand on my shoulder sometimes and gives me smiley looks. Warm expression in the eyes and it seems to be there but less with other students.....EW This makes me feel disgusting. Like I want to fish for favoritism. I don't like it...but I want her to like me!

....

I think the slapstick is more with ENFPs no? My ENFP teacher who loves me always smacks me with stuff more than others. ==" But then again she pokes other people sometimes too.

The prof would mostly treat me like that outside of class. haha, she probably likes you.... don't over-think it.
 

Zhuli Lily Askar

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The prof would mostly treat me like that outside of class. haha, she probably likes you.... don't over-think it.

I wanna disturb her very easily disturbed concentration! Hehe, she is focused yet so easy to get unfocused. She says "I gotta get back to work Lily" and than I just ignore and keep talking....and so does she with enthusiasm! HA.
 

Joehobo

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I don't know if she is connecting or pretending to connect. Sometimes what I don't like about her is that she has the ability to just take in what she wants with someone and simply says things to get more out of the person without offending them, she does this on the basis that she isn't actually hurting them but it is insulting. But then her craziness and selflessness towards doing so much for the good of the greater population regardless of how tired she is....stops you. And than she's interesting. I think she is an ENFJ type 3. She likes professionals, and learning about new cultures. Our school has a lot of Asians, she has taken a liking to us as she just went to work in China over the summer. Did I forget to say she's a history teacher? Anyways I showed off, offered anything about myself. Complimented her but I was being completely honest and it wasn't for the purpose of getting her to open up, not that I'm not happy that she did. I enjoyed talking with her and trusted her and got in the moment with her. Even though I had issues with her earlier in the year. It's rare for someone to actually get to the real me, and she did it so smoothly, especially after I hated her.

I wanna crack all the boundaries! I wanna go somewhere with her, introduce to others that she'd be happy to meet. I wanna learn from and about her and the year is ending and than I won't be in her class and she doesn't even have time for me when I am her student. She teaches a class I am taking next year. I want her, no picking teachers. This is shitty.

Lol wow.. I can really relate to that. It's like a form of manipulation, and it is selfish in a sense but they mean the best by it. It frustrates the living crap out of me though.
Your honestly just going to have to keep going how you are and see how things go, don't intrude in her personal space too much though be wary of that. She might be pretty adamant on maintaining the status quo though. I wouldn't take it to heart if you don't end up keeping the connection but I hope that you do since you enjoy her company so much. :(
 

Zhuli Lily Askar

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Lol wow.. I can really relate to that. It's like a form of manipulation, and it is selfish in a sense but they mean the best by it. It frustrates the living crap out of me though.
Your honestly just going to have to keep going how you are and see how things go, don't intrude in her personal space too much though be wary of that. She might be pretty adamant on maintaining the status quo though. I wouldn't take it to heart if you don't end up keeping the connection but I hope that you do since you enjoy her company so much. :(

...WAHHHHHHHHHHHHH~
 

Joehobo

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...WAHHHHHHHHHHHHH~


Reality is a bitch but don't let that get you down, it gives suprises aswell!
I'm just saying, let it flow as it should, don't be hurt if it doesn't work out the way you want it.

:cry:
:hug::hug:
 

Zhuli Lily Askar

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Reality is a bitch but don't let that get you down, it gives suprises aswell!
I'm just saying, let it flow as it should, don't be hurt if it doesn't work out the way you want it.

:cry:
:hug::hug:

I won't let her go! I'll tell her my Mom has a teaching credential (true actually), maybe that will perk her up! But ohhhh, than it won't be a relationship just for the sake of it.... WAHHHHHHH~ Why does she have to be like that?! But then again it wouldn't be her...
 

Joehobo

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I won't let her go! I'll tell her my Mom has a teaching credential (true actually), maybe that will perk her up! But ohhhh, than it won't be a relationship just for the sake of it.... WAHHHHHHH~ Why does she have to be like that?! But then again it wouldn't be her...

Well you don't want to come off as strong now do you..? Keep trying to interact with her when she doesn't want to will frustrate her, even with the easily distracted part.
 
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