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  1. #11
    Content. Content? DigitalMethod's Avatar
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    I wonder if ENFJ actually understand themselves, or if they just appear to be confident in themselves so that they can manipulate others. I assume it is both, some ENFJ just are darker than others. The lighter ENFJ I don't really hate or love. Of course I haven't known a light ENFJ.
    "The life of the individual has meaning only insofar as it aids in making the life of every living thing nobler and more beautiful."
    - Albert Einstein

  2. #12
    Senior Member Littlelostnf's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by DigitalMethod View Post
    I wonder if ENFJ actually understand themselves, or if they just appear to be confident in themselves so that they can manipulate others. I assume it is both, some ENFJ just are darker than others. The lighter ENFJ I don't really hate or love. Of course I haven't known a light ENFJ.
    Why do you think that? What has been your experience with a "dark" ENFJ?..perhaps this should get moved to a dif thread as we are suppose to be showing love..but I would love to know the answer.
    for my life is slowed up by thought and the need to understand what I am living.

  3. #13
    Feline Member kelric's Avatar
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    Default ENFJ Love

    I've only known a few people who I'm pretty sure are ENFJ's, but I've never had anything but great experiences with the ones I've known (well, except for the one I knew in college who I should have asked out but didn't - but that was hardly her fault). They've all been fun, funny, friendly, and the kinds of people who inevitably brighten my day.

  4. #14
    にゃん runvardh's Avatar
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    *pats Third Rider* it's ok, we still love you.
    Dreams are best served manifest and tangible.

    INFP, 6w7, IEI

    I accept no responsibility, what so ever, for the fact that I exist; I do, however, accept full responsibility for what I do while I exist.

    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

  5. #15
    not to be trusted miss fortune's Avatar
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    Like the little girl with a curl in the middle of her forehead, when ENFJs are good they are very, very good but when they are bad they are horrid (beware, nursery rhyme reference!)

    ENFJs are walking passion about things- they might fight with you but that's because they genuinely care! They're generous, creative and good at putting people in thier places when they have it coming
    “Oh, we're always alright. You remember that. We happen to other people.” -Terry Pratchett

  6. #16
    Senior Member theshadow's Avatar
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    what I love about enfj's.. hmm I seem incapable of thinking of any downsides. hahaha jk

    seriuosly though. I love to motivate people.... if your my friend atleast.'

    and as far as "dark enfj" I would just like to say that "for myself atleast" I constantly am looking to understand the unerlying meaning of whats going on in the interactions and why so.... after a while you start to understand how people limit themselves and could theoreticly "whistle" use it to your advantage. .

    If I could speculate here, assuming we believe in the mbti types. does it not make sense that an enfj "Fe" dom would be bitter about others not accepting him. EVEN if he has a solid identity and isnt willing to be influenced by others bs... not that he/she shouldnt overcome it but... imagine being litterally in love with an entire system that didnt accept you.. I can think of a lot of ways to describe enfj's but "normal" isnt one of them..hmmm say .. EVER. is it not possible then that
    perhaps a dark enfj is just one that is tired of trying to put life into a system that doesnt give back.maybe not all enfj's are embraced but some actually thrown out? "I have a few enfj friends that you might call dark so.. " instead they get bitter and take what they can get.

  7. #17
    Member TK*'s Avatar
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    I know only two ENFJs, one male, one female and they both are really caring and generous. The two I know really love to help people. They're very good at getting people to open up and feel comfortable.
    I am known for being brutally honest...brace yourself.

    INFJ 4w5

  8. #18
    Senior Member chris1207's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by theshadow View Post
    what I love about enfj's.. hmm I seem incapable of thinking of any downsides. hahaha jk

    seriuosly though. I love to motivate people.... if your my friend atleast.'

    and as far as "dark enfj" I would just like to say that "for myself atleast" I constantly am looking to understand the unerlying meaning of whats going on in the interactions and why so.... after a while you start to understand how people limit themselves and could theoreticly "whistle" use it to your advantage. .

    If I could speculate here, assuming we believe in the mbti types. does it not make sense that an enfj "Fe" dom would be bitter about others not accepting him. EVEN if he has a solid identity and isnt willing to be influenced by others bs... not that he/she shouldnt overcome it but... imagine being litterally in love with an entire system that didnt accept you.. I can think of a lot of ways to describe enfj's but "normal" isnt one of them..hmmm say .. EVER. is it not possible then that
    perhaps a dark enfj is just one that is tired of trying to put life into a system that doesnt give back.maybe not all enfj's are embraced but some actually thrown out? "I have a few enfj friends that you might call dark so.. " instead they get bitter and take what they can get.
    Hey now! That's like me! I'm always asking myself if helping someone out, mostly in the case of being generous, would benefit me. My ENFP friend who I don't see too often was astounded when I revealed a much more generous side to myself the last time I visited. I think "dark ENFJs", like myself, should stop thinking everyone is out to screw them and start actually believing that not all people are as benevolent as them. They should be more discerning, however painful that may be.

    (Is it just me or does the term "dark ENFJ" remind anyone of "dark Link" from Ocarina of Time?)

  9. #19
    @.~*virinaĉo*~.@ Totenkindly's Avatar
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    If I ever fall in love as things move forward, I am betting it will be with an ENFJ.

    People-sensitive, the perfect teacher/mentor, able to see what is within someone and coax it out. I love that. They might be EJ, but usually low-key and able to interact well with introverts.

    They are passionate about people without being mushy-gushy, it's all usually level-headed stuff. They also know how to interact with others in a way that properly conveys their intentions. They are willing to take initiative. They have vision. Usually good judges of character.
    "Hey Capa -- We're only stardust." ~ "Sunshine"

    “Pleasure to me is wonder—the unexplored, the unexpected, the thing that is hidden and the changeless thing that lurks behind superficial mutability. To trace the remote in the immediate; the eternal in the ephemeral; the past in the present; the infinite in the finite; these are to me the springs of delight and beauty.” ~ H.P. Lovecraft

  10. #20
    Senior Member ceecee's Avatar
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    My ENFJ is the most kind, warm and stubbornly loving man I have ever met. I'm not a deep feeling sharer and when things got hard I use to push everyone away with...Go away, I'll deal with it. He never bought this (stubborn) and insisted I communicate the feelings and thoughts I had that effected us, but still respected and understood my need for space and privacy.

    Bigger still, I never trusted anyone. At all. Ever. He gave me the ability to do so, even if it's only he that I trust. Completely dependable and responsible and when I need something, I only have to ask. Even though that in itself is SO hard for me...he understands that and still encourages me. I won't say it's easy now but easier.

    He's a leader in his career. Confident. Logical and rational. He always goes the extra mile for his clients and coworkers but never to the point of sacrificing us or the kids. He's a wonderful teacher and happily instructs anyone in his life who needs it, professionally and personally.

    Yeah I could wax on all day about him because it's all true. He's not without fault though. He has high expectations of the people he cares about. He can get offended by things I say and do because they appear cold to him, but he isn't afraid to tell me I am full of shit when I am. All things considered, he's pretty amazing and the fact that he never said...you're so weird, I don't think this will work...blows my mind. Every single day, I am thankful he's in my life.

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