User Tag List

12 Last

Results 1 to 10 of 11

  1. #1
    Certified Sausage Smoker Elfboy's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    MBTI
    ENFP
    Enneagram
    5w4 sx/sp
    Socionics
    SLI None
    Posts
    9,635

    Default FPs and being surprised by others who share the same feelings as you

    I used to have a tendency to think things like
    - "no one would share my interests in _____"
    - "no one feels the same way as I do about that"
    - "no one else would feel that way"
    - "no one was going to stand up for that guy if I didn't"

    then one day at around 14 I decided "fuck it" and became much more open about my interests. to my surprise, I found that their were a number of people who could relate to my interests and feelings on things. it never occurred to me that there were actually other people out their with whom I shared emotional emotional ground and preferences

    do any other FPs relate to this. I'm pretty sure it has to do with Fi
    ENFP: We put the Fi in Fire
    ENFP
    5w4>1w9>2w1 Sx/Sp
    SEE-Fi
    Papa Bear
    Motivation: Dark Worker
    Alignment: Chaotic Neutral
    Chibi Seme
    MTG Color: black/red
    Male Archtype: King/Lover
    Sunburst!
    "You are a gay version of Gambit" Speed Gavroche
    "I wish that I could be affected by any hate, but I can't, cuz I just get affected by the bank" Chamillionaire

  2. #2
    You have a choice! 21%'s Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2009
    MBTI
    INFJ
    Enneagram
    4w5
    Posts
    2,632

    Default

    I think I felt the same way when I 'opened up' at 17. But then I felt threatened because I didn't feel special anymore
    4w5 sp/sx EII

  3. #3
    Permabanned
    Join Date
    May 2009
    MBTI
    ISFP
    Enneagram
    6w7 sx
    Socionics
    SEE Fi
    Posts
    25,301

    Default

    I realized this when I discovered the Internet, the glorious Internet.

  4. #4
    Sugar Hiccup OrangeAppled's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2009
    MBTI
    INFP
    Enneagram
    4w5 sp/sx
    Socionics
    IEI Ni
    Posts
    7,661

    Default

    Yes, and I felt a massive alienation from others. Most of this feeling was rooted in reality; it was confirmed by invalidation from others, being made to feel like some voice of dissent or like a weirdo because I didn't go along with the consensus, and finding many people just plain didn't know what I was talking about (both with interests & feelings).

    It was surprising to find people who feel similar to me, and it continues to be surprising, because they are not the majority. However, I find it increasingly easier to relate to other people, even when we have little in common. I've taken to stripping away the surface stuff about people & seeing what is there about them that is just human.

    I see this weird mix in INFP forums all the time. They all mostly have this sense of alienation, and it IS rooted in reality, and yet someone of another type could show up & claim to be INFP & relate their feelings & most of them would say, "I can relate!".
    Often a star was waiting for you to notice it. A wave rolled toward you out of the distant past, or as you walked under an open window, a violin yielded itself to your hearing. All this was mission. But could you accomplish it? (Rilke)

    INFP | 4w5 sp/sx | RLUEI - Primary Inquisitive | Tritype is tripe

  5. #5
    Senior Member Joehobo's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2009
    MBTI
    INFP
    Enneagram
    9w1 sx/sp
    Posts
    300

    Default

    I can relate to these posts. What the OP brough up are reasons why I felt so apart and couldn't understand people untill I was 16-17.

  6. #6
    Senior Member Viridian's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2010
    MBTI
    IsFJ
    Posts
    3,088

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Marmie Dearest View Post
    I realized this when I discovered the Internet, the glorious Internet.
    Pretty much this, especially concerning interests.

    Although the feelings of shame haven't gone away...
    Tentative typing: ISFJ 6w5 or 9w1 (Sp/S[?]).

  7. #7
    Certified Sausage Smoker Elfboy's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    MBTI
    ENFP
    Enneagram
    5w4 sx/sp
    Socionics
    SLI None
    Posts
    9,635

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Viridian View Post
    Pretty much this, especially concerning interests.

    Although the feelings of shame haven't gone away...
    for me it was more paranoia. "people are gonna see me as weak if they know my real self"
    ENFP: We put the Fi in Fire
    ENFP
    5w4>1w9>2w1 Sx/Sp
    SEE-Fi
    Papa Bear
    Motivation: Dark Worker
    Alignment: Chaotic Neutral
    Chibi Seme
    MTG Color: black/red
    Male Archtype: King/Lover
    Sunburst!
    "You are a gay version of Gambit" Speed Gavroche
    "I wish that I could be affected by any hate, but I can't, cuz I just get affected by the bank" Chamillionaire

  8. #8
    Honor Thy Inferior Such Irony's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    MBTI
    INtp
    Enneagram
    5w6 sp/so
    Socionics
    LII Ne
    Posts
    5,091

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Elfboy View Post
    I used to have a tendency to think things like
    - "no one would share my interests in _____"
    - "no one feels the same way as I do about that"
    - "no one else would feel that way"
    - "no one was going to stand up for that guy if I didn't"

    then one day at around 14 I decided "fuck it" and became much more open about my interests. to my surprise, I found that their were a number of people who could relate to my interests and feelings on things. it never occurred to me that there were actually other people out their with whom I shared emotional emotional ground and preferences

    do any other FPs relate to this. I'm pretty sure it has to do with Fi
    Growing up, I had the opposite problem. I expected that others would share my interests and feelings about things, then I'd be disappointed in them if they didn't. I didn't realize my own uniqueness at the time. After awhile of being ridiculed and having my feelings invalidated, I started keeping alot about myself inside. The internet feels like a safer place to open up than the real world. I know I find someone to relate to about certain things online. I
    INtp
    5w6 or 9w1 sp/so/sx, I think
    Ravenclaw/Hufflepuff
    Neutral Good
    LII-Ne




  9. #9
    Sweet Ocean Cloud SD45T-2's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2012
    MBTI
    ESTJ
    Enneagram
    1w2 so/sp
    Posts
    2,761

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by OrangeAppled View Post
    I see this weird mix in INFP forums all the time. They all mostly have this sense of alienation, and it IS rooted in reality, and yet someone of another type could show up & claim to be INFP & relate their feelings & most of them would say, "I can relate!".
    Sort of INFP community solipsism?
    1w2-6w5-3w2 so/sp

    "I took one those personality tests. It came back negative." - Dan Mintz

  10. #10
    011235813
    Guest

    Default

    I can't say it's been an issue for me. I've had my moments of feeling different (partly as a result of being constantly told I WAS different as a child) but it really doesn't feel like a fundamental part of who I am. On the whole, I identify and empathize with people pretty easily and don't find it hard to discover things I have in common with them. I have some niche interests, but I've always been pretty lucky in finding people who shared them.

    This might partly be a 4 vs. 9 thing ... or maybe a non-9 thing. I don't think it's isolation that makes me feel misunderstood; it's a lack of recognition and appreciation. I like flying under the radar most of the time but I hate being chronically overlooked because I'm quiet and accommodating and have to push back against that.

Similar Threads

  1. Replies: 22
    Last Post: 02-28-2014, 10:18 AM
  2. How to get over being drained by other people?
    By badger055 in forum Myers-Briggs and Jungian Cognitive Functions
    Replies: 28
    Last Post: 01-11-2014, 08:37 PM
  3. people that you relate to who don't share the same type as you
    By Chanaynay in forum Myers-Briggs and Jungian Cognitive Functions
    Replies: 2
    Last Post: 09-15-2013, 02:17 PM
  4. [ENFP] ENFP and being judged/judging others
    By Lily flower in forum The NF Idyllic (ENFP, INFP, ENFJ, INFJ)
    Replies: 22
    Last Post: 11-17-2011, 07:14 PM
  5. Post songs by peoples who share your type
    By Speed Gavroche in forum The Bonfire
    Replies: 9
    Last Post: 12-04-2009, 05:44 AM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
Single Sign On provided by vBSSO