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  1. #31
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    Quote Originally Posted by The Great One View Post
    I can just kind of get ins-inc with the other person emotionally and make them feel better. Also, touch is my number one love language.
    Touch is my number one love language. Touch has nothing to do with Fi or Fe. If anything, I would guess it to maybe be more important to people with Se or Si versus Ni or Ne.

    No, I don't sync up with other people, unless I genuinely like them or feel a real connection. Then I'm very open. Otherwise it's the me show. When I was a child I could sing, dance, act, and show-off...but interpersonal interactions made me nervous.

    I used to feel more comfortable on stage than I did talking to a new person one-on-one. I don't know how much of this is due to having Fi versus Fe, or simply having social anxiety.

  2. #32
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    Quote Originally Posted by Marmie Dearest View Post
    Touch is my number one love language. Touch has nothing to do with Fi or Fe. If anything, I would guess it to maybe be more important to people with Se or Si versus Ni or Ne.

    No, I don't sync up with other people, unless I genuinely like them or feel a real connection. Then I'm very open. Otherwise it's the me show. When I was a child I could sing, dance, act, and show-off...but interpersonal interactions made me nervous.

    I used to feel more comfortable on stage than I did talking to a new person one-on-one. I don't know how much of this is due to having Fi versus Fe, or simply having social anxiety.
    There are a couple things that seperate Fe and Fi users:

    1. Fe users can feel others emotions better than their own, but yet express their feelings and put them into words more easily. Fi users on the other hand, can feel their own emotions better than others, but yet have trouble putting their feelings into words.

    2. Fe moral values come from an outside source, such as upbringing or possibly their religion. Fi morals come from the inside and are created by that personal individual. It should also be noted that Fi users often lay out their moral values and tell you what they are, much more easily than Fe users can.

    3. Fe is much more into social graces than Fi. Fe users are more likely to be polite, not offend people, and not to go against the group. Fi users don't tend to follow social graces as much, and tend to do things based on their moral values and how they feel about things.

    4. Fe is much more self-sacrificing than Fi. Fi is more concerned about what they want than what others want.

  3. #33
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    Quote Originally Posted by The Great One View Post
    There are a couple things that seperate Fe and Fi users:

    1. Fe users can feel others emotions better than their own, but yet express their feelings and put them into words more easily. Fi users on the other hand, can feel their own emotions better than others, but yet have trouble putting their feelings into words.

    2. Fe moral values come from an outside source, such as upbringing or possibly their religion. Fi morals come from the inside and are created by that personal individual. It should also be noted that Fi users often lay out their moral values and tell you what they are, much more easily than Fe users can.

    3. Fe is much more into social graces than Fi. Fe users are more likely to be polite, not offend people, and not to go against the group. Fi users don't tend to follow social graces as much, and tend to do things based on their moral values and how they feel about things.

    4. Fe is much more self-sacrificing than Fi. Fi is more concerned about what they want than what others want.
    Yes, I can read Jung myself thanks. I'm still not sure what this has to do with you loving physical affection. I don't mean SEXUALLY cold or AFFECTIONATELY cold toward people I actually love. Why would his mom think anything about my physical need for touch? o_0

    One more thing: Fi isn't always self-centered or entirely concerned with themselves. It's just that they have to genuinely feel another Fi rationale for thinking of others like "these are my people."

    I've seen Fe doms be selfish, also. I can see you have much to learn.

  4. #34
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    Quote Originally Posted by Marmie Dearest View Post
    Yes, I can read Jung myself thanks. I'm still not sure what this has to do with you loving physical affection. I don't mean SEXUALLY cold or AFFECTIONATELY cold toward people I actually love. Why would his mom think anything about my physical need for touch? o_0

    One more thing: Fi isn't always self-centered or entirely concerned with themselves. It's just that they have to genuinely feel another Fi rationale for thinking of others like "these are my people."

    I've seen Fe doms be selfish, also. I can see you have much to learn.
    Yes, I don't understand Fi that well

  5. #35
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    Quote Originally Posted by The Great One View Post
    Yes, I don't understand Fi that well
    It made so much sense to me when I read Jung's Extraverted Feeling type versus the Introverted Feeling type. The "cold" or "childlike" mask ...which seem like two extremes, like an innocent babe in the woods (my ESFJ friend said when she first met me she thought I was so sweet, nice, couldn't stand up to anyone, and pictured me standing in West Virginia feeding Bambi from my hand) or like coming across all Pe (I think the childlike aura could come from Se or Ne rather than Fi, the extroverted perceiving) and playful...or the inward emotional reservation that can seem cold, that hides deep, deep, intense feelings.

    Though young Fi is self-contained and even self-centered (and this is why it makes me crazy sometimes in adult IxTJs, because it's like their Fi is permanently somewhat childlike in the tertiary position) it doesn't mean Fi types can't be polite or think of others or want to help others...it's just that if an Fi type is polite, they can explain to you exactly why they were polite, like they have a certain individual ethic for it.

    As Fi matures it tends to tap more into universal tolerance, and in an Se/Fi or Fi/Se type, greater and greater empathy would grow for others from having more and more life experiences. Because Fi empathy comes from Fi types RELATING to someone else's pain, like "how would I feel if I were them?" and feeling it...rather than necessary syncing up with what the other person feels.

  6. #36
    Analytical Dreamer Coriolis's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Marmie Dearest View Post
    As Fi matures it tends to tap more into universal tolerance, and in an Se/Fi or Fi/Se type, greater and greater empathy would grow for others from having more and more life experiences. Because Fi empathy comes from Fi types RELATING to someone else's pain, like "how would I feel if I were them?" and feeling it...rather than necessary syncing up with what the other person feels.
    Does this even work, though? Does "if I were them" mean "if I were experiencing the same type of situation they are"? In my experience, how I feel in situations is often quite different from how others feel, or at least how they say they feel. This is why I hesitate to make assumptions about other people's reactions and behavior based on my own.

    Quote Originally Posted by Marmie Dearest View Post
    Sometimes I feel bad for IxTJs for this reason. Other times I wanna fuckin' shake 'em.
    What reason - because we have only tertiary Fi and aren't that good with it?

    Your comment about being possessive of our Fi information was interesting. I do journal sometimes, to include inner feelings, and usually want to burn the pages forthwith because I am paranoid that someone might find and read them.
    I've been called a criminal, a terrorist, and a threat to the known universe. But everything you were told is a lie. The truth is, they've taken our freedom, our home, and our future. The time has come for all humanity to take a stand...

  7. #37
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    Quote Originally Posted by Coriolis View Post
    Does this even work, though? Does "if I were them" mean "if I were experiencing the same type of situation they are"? In my experience, how I feel in situations is often quite different from how others feel, or at least how they say they feel. This is why I hesitate to make assumptions about other people's reactions and behavior based on my own.
    I think with Fi dom/aux it's just "instinctive" with us and we don't even consciously think "if I were them" ...it's not even that contrived. We just feel pain for another's suffering. As Fi types grow older, though, I think it does help to develop other functions so that this empathy is as accurate as possible. I think Ni development has really helped me to look at things from other perspectives.

    It's weird, that sometimes I can FEEL that other people have Fi, which leads me to my next point...


    What reason - because we have only tertiary Fi and aren't that good with it?
    Um a lot of times IxTJs can seem self-centered and wayyy too guarded to a much older age because their Fi is tertiary rather than dom/aux, which can be frustrating of course for someone who strongly values Fi. I say that INTJs without Fi development are some of the most infuriating people...but that's not even true. IxTJs always have this little soft spot, even when they're totally immature, so they just seem kind of like a self-congratulatory self-absorbed kid...sometimes when they're 26. I mean xxFPs can be this way as adults, too, but Fi tends to get more and more ethically refined with age and maturity, and this happens more easily in the dom/aux position.

    I feel that IxTJs are very sensitive when I'm close to them, though. Like if they actually let you in at all...I swear it's like I feel it. I remember the strong, strong awareness I had of it in my grandfather as a child, like I felt like I understood his inner person, as much as his inner person could be vaguely understood, because he was a very private, guarded individual who tended to show love by deep loyalty, consistency and acts of service, as well as occasional displays of lavish generosity rather than being very "emo."

    I knew JTG was an ISTJ for a similar reason. Like he communicates his feelings through music, and told me about himself, and I was like OMG YOU HAVE Fi. And at first it was just a feeling, like an inner knowing, and later he actually described to me verbally manifestations of tertiary Fi in an IxTJ.

    However, with strange IxTJs (especially young-ish INTJs) sometimes I have to remind myself that if they are acting bratty, they are actually squishy on the inside.

    I think mirrors can frustrate people. Like "your immature Fi reminds me of my bad/immature Fi....arrgh I hate you!"

    But on the other hand it can give you a sense of understanding a person.

    Your comment about being possessive of our Fi information was interesting. I do journal sometimes, to include inner feelings, and usually want to burn the pages forthwith because I am paranoid that someone might find and read them.
    Yep, totally know that feeling, though it was more intense when I was younger, and I've opened up more as I've gotten older.

  8. #38
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    Quote Originally Posted by Marmie Dearest View Post
    It made so much sense to me when I read Jung's Extraverted Feeling type versus the Introverted Feeling type. The "cold" or "childlike" mask ...which seem like two extremes, like an innocent babe in the woods (my ESFJ friend said when she first met me she thought I was so sweet, nice, couldn't stand up to anyone, and pictured me standing in West Virginia feeding Bambi from my hand) or like coming across all Pe (I think the childlike aura could come from Se or Ne rather than Fi, the extroverted perceiving) and playful...or the inward emotional reservation that can seem cold, that hides deep, deep, intense feelings.

    Though young Fi is self-contained and even self-centered (and this is why it makes me crazy sometimes in adult IxTJs, because it's like their Fi is permanently somewhat childlike in the tertiary position) it doesn't mean Fi types can't be polite or think of others or want to help others...it's just that if an Fi type is polite, they can explain to you exactly why they were polite, like they have a certain individual ethic for it.

    As Fi matures it tends to tap more into universal tolerance, and in an Se/Fi or Fi/Se type, greater and greater empathy would grow for others from having more and more life experiences. Because Fi empathy comes from Fi types RELATING to someone else's pain, like "how would I feel if I were them?" and feeling it...rather than necessary syncing up with what the other person feels.
    Why would empathy be stronger in an Se<Fi user, than an Ne<Fi user?

  9. #39
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    Verbalizing ?


    That is nothing compared to searching for logical and strategic inconsistencies in the persons Fi. While in the end you make a chart of how many of their feelings lead to something realistic in the given situation , how much of them are non sense or bitching and how many are mixed.


    And in the end you give them the chart and openly suggest what they should do to solve the problem(s). In order to clean the negative side of the emotional chart.



    Dont worry I dont do this any more since I matured.

  10. #40
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    Quote Originally Posted by Antisocial one View Post
    Verbalizing ?


    That is nothing compared to searching for logical and strategic inconsistencies in the persons Fi. While in the end you make a chart of how many of their feelings lead to something realistic in the given situation , how much of them are non sense or bitching and how many are mixed.


    And in the end you give them the chart and openly suggest what they should do to solve the problem(s). In order to clean the negative side of the emotional chart.



    Dont worry I dont do this any more since I matured.
    Give me an example of an Fi flow chart. This sounds interesting.

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