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  1. #21
    Senior Member The Great One's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by LunaLuminosity View Post
    Yes, you understand the difference well....


    Oh, and for the record, I don't even really grasp much of what you guys are talking about much less relate :P
    I once had an ENFP try to put his emotions into words for me and he just couldn't. He told me that there just weren't words that could describe how he was feeling. Then, when he tried to put his feelings into words, it sounded almost med-evil. Fi is a very strange function.

  2. #22
    Tier 1 Member LunaLuminosity's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by The Great One View Post
    I once had an ENFP try to put his emotions into words for me and he just couldn't. He told me that there just weren't words that could describe how he was feeling. Then, when he tried to put his feelings into words, it sounded almost med-evil. Fi is a very strange function.
    That is strange.... and that even in the auxiliary position that Fi would be so deep and mysterious. I'm pretty feely but don't have that depth, more like a knob that has settings: excited, bored, frustrated, and totally bleh. Sometimes it seems like Fi? But I go about it so shallowly that it makes things confusing. But I guess it isn't that extremely strange, because I think I experience the same with my rationale for things sometimes.

  3. #23
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    Quote Originally Posted by LunaLuminosity View Post
    That is strange.... and that even in the auxiliary position that Fi would be so deep and mysterious. I'm pretty feely but don't have that depth, more like a knob that has settings: excited, bored, frustrated, and totally bleh. Sometimes it seems like Fi? But I go about it so shallowly that it makes things confusing. But I guess it isn't that extremely strange, because I think I experience the same with my rationale for things sometimes.
    I've had questions about whether I'm ENFP or ENTP and I seem more ENTP because I can always easily express my feelings. Also, I don't seem to be as moral as a typical ENFP, lol

  4. #24
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    Yeah when I was younger I always used to "hide" what I was writing. I didn't want anyone else to read it. Ever. If I let anyone read what I SERIOUSLY wrote, it was a big major thing. When I first started keeping a Live Journal, I was very distanced and even had a very clear persona (Miss Wiss, and I had this "school marm" thing going on...) and I would get embarrassed even posting things in my friends only posts of my Live Journal.

    Clearly, I have come a very long way in my lifetime. However, I think even though I'm much more open now, I still do have that sarcastic or distanced vibe to me from people I don't know well. I also can get very embarrassed sometimes when people reach out to me IRL...depends on the person and the situation.

    However, I always need an outlet. My outlets tend to be music, and guys. I feel like I pour a lot of my feelings into whatever guy I happen to be seeing or am in love with. It reminds me of how the Jungian Fi dom "secretly lets their passion flow into their children" or whatever.

    People IRL usually know me for quite a while before they see me get emotional, and sometimes they're even shocked at first, because I can seem reserved when first meeting people. Well, either I'm reserved, or I have a very friendly but non-emotional chatty side, that is still guarded I think.

    I am extremely emo, though. I don't think I have to tell anyone here that.

  5. #25
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    Quote Originally Posted by Cold Roses View Post
    While I am an INTJ, I have an extremely high usage of Fi (and a decidedly poor use of Fe) and I understand exactly what you are saying. I write poetry and paint and I feel those express my feelings in a much more comfortable manner. I have also journaled in the past, and I felt just as you do. I would read what I wrote and find it beyond trite. Reading my poetry doesn't generally garner such a negative reaction from me. I think Lady X is right...poetry might be your answer to therapeutically work through your feelings. It helps me.

    At any rate, just trying to show some solidarity, here. I get it. It makes perfectly good sense. I often CAN'T even verbalize what I am feeling, but the poetry writing sorts that all out fairly well.
    I wonder if it's even harder for IxTJs. It seems so, from what I've observed. Like I know an ISTJ who has Fi-centered personality traits that somewhat remind me of me, when I was seventeen, if I had been covered in a block of ice.

    Sometimes I feel bad for IxTJs for this reason. Other times I wanna fuckin' shake 'em.

    No offense to you personally.

  6. #26
    Senior Member The Great One's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Marmie Dearest View Post
    Yeah when I was younger I always used to "hide" what I was writing. I didn't want anyone else to read it. Ever. If I let anyone read what I SERIOUSLY wrote, it was a big major thing. When I first started keeping a Live Journal, I was very distanced and even had a very clear persona (Miss Wiss, and I had this "school marm" thing going on...) and I would get embarrassed even posting things in my friends only posts of my Live Journal.

    Clearly, I have come a very long way in my lifetime. However, I think even though I'm much more open now, I still do have that sarcastic or distanced vibe to me from people I don't know well. I also can get very embarrassed sometimes when people reach out to me IRL...depends on the person and the situation.

    However, I always need an outlet. My outlets tend to be music, and guys. I feel like I pour a lot of my feelings into whatever guy I happen to be seeing or am in love with. It reminds me of how the Jungian Fi dom "secretly lets their passion flow into their children" or whatever.

    People IRL usually know me for quite a while before they see me get emotional, and sometimes they're even shocked at first, because I can seem reserved when first meeting people. Well, either I'm reserved, or I have a very friendly but non-emotional chatty side, that is still guarded I think.

    I am extremely emo, though. I don't think I have to tell anyone here that.
    Yeah, I kind of figured that after seeing your cat picture.

  7. #27
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    Quote Originally Posted by LunaLuminosity View Post
    That is strange.... and that even in the auxiliary position that Fi would be so deep and mysterious. I'm pretty feely but don't have that depth, more like a knob that has settings: excited, bored, frustrated, and totally bleh. Sometimes it seems like Fi? But I go about it so shallowly that it makes things confusing. But I guess it isn't that extremely strange, because I think I experience the same with my rationale for things sometimes.
    Yeah Fi is very deep. Like the reason why I used to be so "embarrassed" of things when I was in my teens especially, and even a little into my early twenties, is because everything felt so HUGE and IMPORTANT and MONUMENTAL if I ACTUALLY FELT IT. When my ESFJ ex met me, his mom thought I was "cold" because compared to him being an Fe dom...I seemed pretty much like Daria or something. I actually have had to have therapy and life experience to help draw me out of myself and make it okay to have my intense feelings. I think that's why I'm so intense and proud now, because I spent so much of my earlier life being anxious or embarrassed. I actually feel like my ESFJ ex helped me in this regard because he was so warm, and so insistent about displaying emotion, and he was constantly reaching out. I remember being a teenager and a kid, and having a similar feeling (though not romantic or sexual) toward girls who had Fe, because they seemed like they had motherly qualities, they were so warm and I wondered why I couldn't reach out the way that they could, because I did feel so strongly inside, and when it came out, it seemed to only come out with certain people or at inappropriate times or way too intense.

    I think this is part of what my social anxiety stemmed from.

    My grandfather was an ISTJ and he very much had this same issue, but to the Nth degree. Even as a 50 or 60 year old man, public displays of affection embarrassed the shit out of him, and sometimes he'd say "I love you" all muffled and self-conscious like he was a young guy instead of a middle-aged or old man. He was also very affectionate and loving toward me as a small child, but the older I got the more he put an intentional wall between us, and I realized that this was the way he was with EVERYONE over the age of ten or twelve years old.

    But he had this deep sensitivity that I felt intuitively, instinctively even as a small child. I got mad when other people couldn't see how fragile he could be inside. I even saw him cry a couple of times. I guess it was like my Fi radar picking up on his Fi. He carried this depth inside him, but it was well-hidden.

    That's why when I think of IxTJs and their Fi, I think of that dude from Lord of the Rings standing over their tertiary whispering "my precious, my precious" with a paranoid, guarded look toward any "outsiders."

  8. #28
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    Quote Originally Posted by Marmie Dearest View Post
    Yeah Fi is very deep. Like the reason why I used to be so "embarrassed" of things when I was in my teens especially, and even a little into my early twenties, is because everything felt so HUGE and IMPORTANT and MONUMENTAL if I ACTUALLY FELT IT. When my ESFJ ex met me, his mom thought I was "cold" because compared to him being an Fe dom...I seemed pretty much like Daria or something. I actually have had to have therapy and life experience to help draw me out of myself and make it okay to have my intense feelings. I think that's why I'm so intense and proud now, because I spent so much of my earlier life being anxious or embarrassed. I actually feel like my ESFJ ex helped me in this regard because he was so warm, and so insistent about displaying emotion, and he was constantly reaching out. I remember being a teenager and a kid, and having a similar feeling (though not romantic or sexual) toward girls who had Fe, because they seemed like they had motherly qualities, they were so warm and I wondered why I couldn't reach out the way that they could, because I did feel so strongly inside, and when it came out, it seemed to only come out with certain people or at inappropriate times or way too intense.

    I think this is part of what my social anxiety stemmed from.

    My grandfather was an ISTJ and he very much had this same issue, but to the Nth degree. Even as a 50 or 60 year old man, public displays of affection embarrassed the shit out of him, and sometimes he'd say "I love you" all muffled and self-conscious like he was a young guy instead of a middle-aged or old man. He was also very affectionate and loving toward me as a small child, but the older I got the more he put an intentional wall between us, and I realized that this was the way he was with EVERYONE over the age of ten or twelve years old.

    But he had this deep sensitivity that I felt intuitively, instinctively even as a small child. I got mad when other people couldn't see how fragile he could be inside. I even saw him cry a couple of times. I guess it was like my Fi radar picking up on his Fi. He carried this depth inside him, but it was well-hidden.

    That's why when I think of IxTJs and their Fi, I think of that dude from Lord of the Rings standing over their tertiary whispering "my precious, my precious" with a paranoid, guarded look toward any "outsiders."
    Yeah, I'm an extremely affectionate person, and don't come off as cold at all. My Fe is very powerful

  9. #29
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    Quote Originally Posted by The Great One View Post
    Yeah, I'm an extremely affectionate person, and don't come off as cold at all. My Fe is very powerful
    I love physical affection. Touch is one of my love languages. It has nothing to do with my capacity to be physical. It has more to do with the reserved distance I keep from people I don't know well, or if I don't trust someone, or if they make me angry. It was also partly anxiety. I remember even in the 4th grade being called a "snob" because I was shy.

    Me over 25 is a lot different than me under 25.

  10. #30
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    Quote Originally Posted by Marmie Dearest View Post
    I love physical affection. Touch is one of my love languages. It has nothing to do with my capacity to be physical. It has more to do with the reserved distance I keep from people I don't know well, or if I don't trust someone, or if they make me angry. It was also partly anxiety. I remember even in the 4th grade being called a "snob" because I was shy.

    Me over 25 is a lot different than me under 25.
    I can just kind of get ins-inc with the other person emotionally and make them feel better. Also, touch is my number one love language.

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