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  1. #291
    4x9 cascadeco's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by fidelia View Post
    I have taken a long time to get over breakups, but usually it had more to do with things being left in an unresolved state with questions unanswered or with very inconsistent behaviour following. Even in cases where I recognized it was good to break up, I felt like I wanted the answers to it all before I could just be done. If there is resolution, I think INFJs move on in a pretty normal amount of time. We also don't invest all that easily in people, so it makes sense that we would want to be really sure it was over and we were done before we close that book and move on.
    You worded this MUCH better than I - this is what I was trying to say with my 'question mark' phrase. It's all about the resolution.
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  2. #292
    Senior Member Eileen's Avatar
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    INFJs can be overly cuddly AND cold/distant. And they have temper tantrums. And they hate the idea of being high-maintenance, but they are anyway.
    INFJ

    "I can never be what I ought to be until you are what you ought to be. You can never be what you ought to be until I am what I ought to be. This is the interrelated structure of reality." -Martin Luther King, Jr.

  3. #293
    Ginkgo
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    Quote Originally Posted by SolitaryWalker View Post
    Moreover, what exactly do you think a type is other than some vague and inconsistent characteristics you read about types in online profiles and Keirsey's book? Have you done your homework? Have you thought about what exactly a type is or have you just opened some online page where it says INFJs are exceptionally creative, reserved, thin-skinned as well as fastidious and have gone on to assume that every person who fits this description is an INFJ?
    I agree with the entirety of your post. Might I add that titling the thread "What are your Subjective Viewpoints and Experiences Involving Those Who are Supposedly of the (Already Questionable) INFJ Archetype?" expunges social provocativeness?

    Perhaps those who post here are not operating on individual objective grounds; but are just be reconciling common denominators and patterns for the sake of whimsical Typological integration, socialization, and amusement?

  4. #294
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    Quote Originally Posted by SolitaryWalker View Post
    I do not wish to spoil your enjoyment of this thread by making irrelevant and negative remarks, though did make an observation that is both amusing and descriptive of how people have approached this topic. My remark has more to do with the method that people have used rather than the conclusions they arrived at.

    The method is this: My friend, family member or an SO is an INFJ and he has this quality that I don't like. Therefore I will assume that this is how INFJs are, and on the basis of this I can say why somebody should hate an INFJ.

    Some of you will say that you know more than one INFJ and spent a lot of time observing them. Exactly how many did you observe? Ten? Twenty? One-hundred? Where did you observe them? In your local town? In your state? How do you know that the qualities you observed are to be attributed to the person's type rather than their personal idiosyncrasies or their culture? Your claims would be understandable if you observed thousands of people of this type from a variety of different cultures and they all exhibited the same behaviors, but I don't think any of you have done this.

    Moreover, what exactly do you think a type is other than some vague and inconsistent characteristics you read about types in online profiles and Keirsey's book? Have you done your homework? Have you thought about what exactly a type is or have you just opened some online page where it says INFJs are exceptionally creative, reserved, thin-skinned as well as fastidious and have gone on to assume that every person who fits this description is an INFJ?


    Just because your conclusions are poorly supported and frequently wrong altogether does not mean that you have to stop making them. After all, the pursuit of truth is not for everybody and there is such a thing as a useful illusion, or ideas that are false yet benefit us somehow. So I am all in support of your right to be able to say something that is completely preposterous without worrying about being censored. However, since you get the right to say what you please, I reserve such a prerogative as well and therefore wish to point out where you've gone wrong. Regard my post as purely informative rather than as a set of commands with regard to what you should do or what you should believe.
    +

    Yawn.

  5. #295
    Tenured roisterer SolitaryWalker's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Eileen View Post
    INFJs can be overly cuddly AND cold/distant. And they have temper tantrums. And they hate the idea of being high-maintenance, but they are anyway.
    This would be a true statement if we are to replace 'INFJs' with Eileen and people who she thinks have the INFJ temperament. What does she think an INFJ temperament is? Who knows!? Does she even have a clear and self-consistent definition of an INFJ? We may never know. Regarding whatever definition of an INFJ that she does have, if she has one, do people that she typed as INFJ fit that description? It is difficult for us to know that.

    Is this statement informative to anyone who is seriously trying to study typology? Let the reader decide. Is this statement informative in any respect at all? Yes, it is informative of Eileen's psychology. It is stating that she thinks that there are some people and those people are INFJs. Whatever information this offers about her psychology, it is quite scant as we don't know what she means by 'INFJ'.

    Needless to say, if most typological assertions on this forum are not altogether meaningless, they are not far from it. Eileen's post is a good example of what a typical post around here is on the subject.
    "Do not argue with an idiot. They drag you down to their level and beat you with experience." -- Mark Twain

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  6. #296

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    Quote Originally Posted by Eileen
    INFJs can be overly cuddly AND cold/distant. And they have temper tantrums. And they hate the idea of being high-maintenance, but they are anyway.
    AHHH. This is so me!!!
    Grrrr I hate that I do this.

    Quote Originally Posted by SolitaryWalker
    (everything you wrote in the post above and what was quoted by someone above )
    You make very good points, and it's a great reminder of how we shouldn't take this as complete truth, but regard them as subjective viewpoints from experiences of others with a particular type.

    I didn't think that this thread was necessarily meant to be taken incredibly seriously, though. Definitely not a thread from which to derive factual information for serious academic study on typology. I view it as more of a place to vent the negative experiences one has had with a certain type.

    Obviously MBTI has some great applications and can help a person learn about him/herself and others, but to say that all 6 billion people on Earth fit into one of 16 different types makes no sense. There's obviously great variation within types and types aren't clones of each other.

    You make great points, and I enjoyed reading your insight.

    Quote Originally Posted by MysticTater
    Might I add that titling the thread "What are your Subjective Viewpoints and Experiences Involving Those Who are Supposedly of the (Already Questionable) INFJ Archetype?" expunges social provocativeness?
    LOL! I like it!
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  7. #297
    Senior Member Eileen's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by SolitaryWalker View Post
    This would be a true statement if we are to replace 'INFJs' with Eileen and people who she thinks have the INFJ temperament. What does she think an INFJ temperament is? Who knows!? Does she even have a clear and self-consistent definition of an INFJ? We may never know. Regarding whatever definition of an INFJ that she does have, if she has one, do people that she typed as INFJ fit that description? It is difficult for us to know that.

    Is this statement informative to anyone who is seriously trying to study typology? Let the reader decide. Is this statement informative in any respect at all? Yes, it is informative of Eileen's psychology. It is stating that she thinks that there are some people and those people are INFJs. Whatever information this offers about her psychology, it is quite scant as we don't know what she means by 'INFJ'.

    Needless to say, if most typological assertions on this forum are not altogether meaningless, they are not far from it. Eileen's post is a good example of what a typical post around here is on the subject.

    If you are "seriously trying to study typology," I recommend going elsewhere on the site. If you would like to read posts of INFJs being self-deprecating, stay right where you are. But know the purpose of the thread, dude. Read critically.

    And remember:

    It is

    just.

    the.

    internet.
    INFJ

    "I can never be what I ought to be until you are what you ought to be. You can never be what you ought to be until I am what I ought to be. This is the interrelated structure of reality." -Martin Luther King, Jr.

  8. #298
    Tenured roisterer SolitaryWalker's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Eileen View Post
    If you are "seriously trying to study typology," I recommend going elsewhere on the site. If you would like to read posts of INFJs being self-deprecating, stay right where you are. But know the purpose of the thread, dude. Read critically.

    And remember:

    It is

    just.

    the.

    internet.
    Yeah, you're right, it is just the internet. However, I interpret that statement differently from the way you do. You seem to have the idea that its a place for carefree, friendly chat. I would agree with you about that; however, I think the internet serves more social purposes in addition to that. It offers a laid back and an unstructured venue for people to express their views on just about any matter. Hence, people who want to seriously study typology have every right to voice their views here just as you do.

    I do realize that as a moderator you very much would like to believe that this forum is a more organized place than that, yet it truly is not. If it was, many of our members would find this place much too rigid for their tastes. We all deal with bureaucracy a great deal in our lives that forces us to needlessly follow stringent and arbitrary rules; it is quite fitting for us to get a break from that here.
    "Do not argue with an idiot. They drag you down to their level and beat you with experience." -- Mark Twain

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  9. #299
    Senior Member Grace's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by SolitaryWalker View Post
    This would be a true statement if we are to replace 'INFJs' with Eileen and people who she thinks have the INFJ temperament. What does she think an INFJ temperament is? Who knows!? Does she even have a clear and self-consistent definition of an INFJ? We may never know. Regarding whatever definition of an INFJ that she does have, if she has one, do people that she typed as INFJ fit that description? It is difficult for us to know that.

    Is this statement informative to anyone who is seriously trying to study typology? Let the reader decide. Is this statement informative in any respect at all? Yes, it is informative of Eileen's psychology. It is stating that she thinks that there are some people and those people are INFJs. Whatever information this offers about her psychology, it is quite scant as we don't know what she means by 'INFJ'.

    Needless to say, if most typological assertions on this forum are not altogether meaningless, they are not far from it. Eileen's post is a good example of what a typical post around here is on the subject.
    :zzz:

    Why don't you start your own topic about the ridiculousness of this site. Mmmk?

  10. #300
    Tenured roisterer SolitaryWalker's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Grace View Post
    :zzz:

    Why don't you start your own topic about the ridiculousness of this site. Mmmk?
    Never implied that this site is ridiculous but you certainly are free to interpret my post as having said that directly or implied it.
    "Do not argue with an idiot. They drag you down to their level and beat you with experience." -- Mark Twain

    “No man but a blockhead ever wrote, except for money.”---Samuel Johnson

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