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  1. #1
    Senior Member Winds of Thor's Avatar
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    Default Do Unhealthy INFJs Test People to Find Weakness?

    I recently witnessed excessive testing. It was a little beyond rude of the INFJ and looked disturbed. This had me wondering.

    It's been mentioned often that INFJs Ne 'test' others.

    Isnt this to just get to know another person? Maybe that's naive to assume.

    What might be some other possibly imagineable reasons somebody might Ne test somebody?

    Could it be for no other reason that the person is just really insecure with themself?
    Last edited by Winds of Thor; 03-02-2012 at 12:56 PM. Reason: Clarity added
    "..And the eight and final rule: If this is your first time at Fight Club, you have to fight."
    'Men are meant to be with women. The rest is perversion and mental illness.'

  2. #2
    Iron Maiden fidelia's Avatar
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    I really don't think this is type related. Anyone who is insecure will test people in various ways. We all have insecurities, but the more of them there are, the more likely it is that we either will feel in competition with others or that we will need to keep proving to ourselves that we have value to others. Ironically, the process of seeking this kind of self-validation tends to drive other people away, even those who really care.

    I suppose that depending on type, people's way of dealing with their insecurities may manifest in slightly different ways, but I don't think there is a defining characteristic for each type, either healthy or unhealthy. A lot depends on previous life experiences, trust level to begin with, the type of relationship the two of you share, the person's character and so on. There are just too many variables I think to really give an answer to your questions.

    Just as a side note, INFJs generally don't have Ne in their main function lineup. They are Ni doms, which means that introverted intuition is their primary function.

  3. #3
    Senior Member Winds of Thor's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by fidelia View Post
    I really don't think this is type related. Anyone who is insecure will test people in various ways. We all have insecurities, but the more of them there are, the more likely it is that we either will feel in competition with others or that we will need to keep proving to ourselves that we have value to others. Ironically, the process of seeking this kind of self-validation tends to drive other people away, even those who really care.

    I suppose that depending on type, people's way of dealing with their insecurities may manifest in slightly different ways, but I don't think there is a defining characteristic for each type, either healthy or unhealthy. A lot depends on previous life experiences, trust level to begin with, the type of relationship the two of you share, the person's character and so on. There are just too many variables I think to really give an answer to your questions.

    Just as a side note, INFJs generally don't have Ne in their main function lineup. They are Ni doms, which means that introverted intuition is their primary function.
    Mmmmm, insightful. Thanks for the food.

    You have a vast intellect.
    "..And the eight and final rule: If this is your first time at Fight Club, you have to fight."
    'Men are meant to be with women. The rest is perversion and mental illness.'

  4. #4
    Senior Member Winds of Thor's Avatar
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    Hrmm, could you possibly imagine if it could be used against, another person?

    In other words, to try and find weaknesses?

    I was caught off-guard. After thinking about what I saw, my intuition started forming a dull holograph of this possibility.

    I hate to ask that, sorry.
    "..And the eight and final rule: If this is your first time at Fight Club, you have to fight."
    'Men are meant to be with women. The rest is perversion and mental illness.'

  5. #5
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    Quote Originally Posted by Avatar7 View Post
    Hrmm, could you possibly imagine if it could be used against, another person?

    In other words, to try and find weaknesses?
    Either this, or the person is attempting to find if the other person is trustworthy (sounds like it's been taken to a fault, in this case). See also: Enneagram type 6, known for doubting/testing things in order to determine how 'secure' they are as a coping mechanism.

  6. #6
    Senior Member Winds of Thor's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by bologna View Post
    Either this, or the person is attempting to find if the other person is trustworthy (sounds like it's been taken to a fault, in this case).
    Yes. The recipient called it out and the testing even continued after that.

    Thanks for this I'm going to go read it. I do know the enneagram of the tester is a 1w2.
    "..And the eight and final rule: If this is your first time at Fight Club, you have to fight."
    'Men are meant to be with women. The rest is perversion and mental illness.'

  7. #7
    Senior Member Winds of Thor's Avatar
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    Sounds really similar..could have been mistyped.
    "..And the eight and final rule: If this is your first time at Fight Club, you have to fight."
    'Men are meant to be with women. The rest is perversion and mental illness.'

  8. #8
    can't handcuff the wind Z Buck McFate's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by bologna View Post
    Either this, or the person is attempting to find if the other person is trustworthy (sounds like it's been taken to a fault, in this case). See also: Enneagram type 6, known for doubting/testing things in order to determine how 'secure' they are as a coping mechanism.

    This was my first thought too, that I don't particularly remember this being said of INFJs that often (I'd need a specific example of the 'testing' to know if it's especially INFJ related), but I know it's something e6s are known for.
    Reality is a collective hunch. -Lily Tomlin

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  9. #9
    Senior Member Winds of Thor's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Z Buck McFate View Post
    This was my first thought too, that I don't particularly remember this being said of INFJs that often (I'd need a specific example of the 'testing' to know if it's especially INFJ related), but I know it's something e6s are known for.
    The 'testing' was more or less a launch of insults, accusations. Only very few were true. Most all were known to be not true. The recipient got 'accused' of having Asberger's Syndrome. And I know they don't have Asberger's because he's very considerate and personable. But that's neither here nor there.

    Because it's just wrong to accuse someone of that.

    It was so ugly and I think, cruel. So cruel mind you that if that, coming from an INFJ, we're sincere, I don't know for sure what to believe. Of all types, INFJs I would think would be empathic enough to not say such an awful thing to someone.
    "..And the eight and final rule: If this is your first time at Fight Club, you have to fight."
    'Men are meant to be with women. The rest is perversion and mental illness.'

  10. #10
    can't handcuff the wind Z Buck McFate's Avatar
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    The unpopular answer: tunnel vision can cause blocks in empathy. While testing isn't something I'd personally say is an INFJ weakness, sometimes tunnel vision- and thinking we know all there is to know about the other person's experience, so we'd 'know' if something was truly going to be hurtful- can cause NFJs to say incredibly hurtful things without taking responsibility for the suffering it actually causes. They can be resistant to hearing that it's hurtful, because they 'know' (magically) it isn't. *Tunnel vision*.

    I also need to throw in that **MOST** NFJs are too self aware to do this, and the thought of it is even kinda horrifying.

    But as far as the 'testing', I don't think that's especially an INFJ thing.
    Reality is a collective hunch. -Lily Tomlin

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