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  1. #31
    Undisciplined Starry's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by HelenOfTroy View Post
    I do feel the worlds pain though. Not all of the time but theres are times when i think i could conbust with the suffering of others. For real. I don't push it away mostly but i do have to cut of in order to carry on living.
    I have moments of revelation when i think my heart could burst. Those times i feel like a warrior and i need to fight, to charge at the world for all it's cruelty. I can be very emo.
    I really identify with this.

  2. #32
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    Quote Originally Posted by shortnsweet View Post
    :girlpower:

    Wait a minute.... Was this meant to offend my value of being a unique individual???

    :SaiyanSmilie_anim:
    Just an observation is all. No insults.

  3. #33
    darkened dreams labyrinthine's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by shortnsweet View Post
    People would be a wreck if they let in all the problems of the world. It's a protective mechanism. I know personally, if I let my guard down a little bit a lot of crap pours in and then I can end up rather angry and bitter and upset. Gotta kind of glaze over things as a protective mechanism to function well. True for anyone, any type, I think. Just some may be more prone towards it than others.
    ^This is one important factor in how people react to the suffering of others.

    It is worth looking at what empathy is and how it is developed. It's not necessarily something that happens without explanation or just "is". Perhaps there can be natural inclinations towards or away from empathy based on nature, but it is partly developed through experience, focus, and actions.

    Empathy has a great deal to do with learning how to comprehend pain that is greater than what we have experienced personally and to not dismiss pain that is less than our own. If we can only feel others pain that matches our own, this is projection and not empathy. There is necessarily an element of relating our own personal experiences with those of others, but then being able to go beyond that to more closely match their actual experience. A person who has never been hungry with the fear of not being able to satisfy the hunger will be less likely to comprehend the nuance and depth of that experience.

    I've noticed that when people pass judgment on others, it is often based on assumptions from their own life. They assume the person has whatever traits they would have to posses in their context to get the same result. Someone without temporal needs met must be lazy in the eyes of a person who only has to put forth a little effort to be paid and secure their food and shelter. The dynamic of actually being hungry and without shelter is complex and layered and involves more details than is easy to get one's head around without the actual experience.

    As human beings it is easiest to substitute projection for empathy, to assume the other person is like us when we experienced something similar. It is possible to broaden one's experience by hearing more details about the lives and suffering of others and to start to build a more complete conceptual framework of suffering that is different or extends beyond our own, but it is a skill that has to be developed like anything else.
    Step into my metaphysical room of mirrors.
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  4. #34
    Senior Member Forever_Jung's Avatar
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    We only take in so much sensory information at a time because it would overload our brain. The same applies to "feeling" the world's pain.

    Sometimes people feel overwhelmed and take in too much of it, but no one can take in more than an infinitesimal amount of it.

  5. #35
    Senior Member Winds of Thor's Avatar
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    My suggestion would be take it a day at a time. Or an hour, or a minute at a time. Focusing on what your mind or feelings are telling you is the priority.
    "..And the eight and final rule: If this is your first time at Fight Club, you have to fight."
    'Men are meant to be with women. The rest is perversion and mental illness.'

  6. #36
    morose bourgeoisie
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    How is compassion, which is directed at other people, a product of Fi?

  7. #37
    Senior Member tkae.'s Avatar
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    You're an Extrovert, so it's harder for this to work. But generally NFs don't have as much a universal empathy as a very reactionary empathy.

    That being, I'm a hardcore empathetic INFP that's usually in some form of misery because of what's happening to people. But there's also select groups that I border on hypocritical in my disregard for, particularly the pompous and the cruel.

    Couldn't give a flying fuck about them. If Rush Limbaugh had a stroke, couldn't possibly care less. I'd have to go fish for a fuck to give. I could care, and I could care pretty easily if I wanted to. But I make it a point not to care.

    So you aren't looking for an empathy towards random people around you. But if you spend more time caring about some type of cause or some group of people than you do in total nonconcern for the rest of the world, then you're likely an NF.

    Which, like I said, is gonna be harder for you to do since you're an Extrovert. Extroverts aren't geared all that naturally towards being aware of their own inner emotional worlds. That's not saying they can't be, or that there isn't an Extrovert that's extremely skilled in Introspection. But a very Exroverted person trying to figure out what's going on inside of them is about as natural as me trying to be social

    All that to say, you might be leaning more towards ENTPs, who are kickass by the way, they're really cool people. But look more for how often you care as opposed to how often you really couldn't care less. And if you care, what do you care about? Is it ideas? Or is it causes and people?

    And not ideas that affect people, that counts towards being an NF.

    But do you spend your time thinking, "What is reality and how would I graph it on a graphing calculator?"

    Or actually, just go to take the test. Then come back here and we'll hug you. We're NFs, that's what we do (whether you're one of us or not).

    So go, now. Shoo. Take the test.

    Relevant Information: I went without caffeine for a week, I just had a Diet Coke.

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  8. #38
    meh Salomé's Avatar
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    I don't think you're NF.


    EDIT. No one can feel "humanity's pain", only their own.
    Quote Originally Posted by Ivy View Post
    Gosh, the world looks so small from up here on my high horse of menstruation.

  9. #39
    Senior Member sculpting's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Qlip View Post
    I think I'm an NF, but I run on the callous side. It's not that I would ignore a starving person on the street, I wouldn't. But my heart strings aren't as tuggable as NFs here on the forum claim. There's so much pain in the world, and so many people out there aren't afraid of taking advantage of those who would give reflexively, having universal empathy would just wreck me.

    Anybody feel similar?
    I tend to very strongly feel the pain of others, even people I have never met or never will meet. It is simply an internal projection of what I percieve (correctly or incorrectly) that they feel, however the physiological response is still very real. When in doubt about the level of pain the other is in, my perceptions will amplify, rather than reduce the feeling of hurt.

    This really is unpleasent and not functional. As you note thier is just too much pain in the world. As a defensive mechanism I long ago learned to develop a stiff upper lip and not allow my heart to always be open to others pain. This sounds really sad, but it allows me to shield myself somewhat from thier hurt. Thus rather than offer sympathy or extend an emotional arm, I tend to look for the physical concrete things I can do to help the other person or group of people.

    Trying to help each individual seems so hopeless.

    Quote Originally Posted by Coriolis View Post
    I am much more likely to feel compassion for a broad group of people (e.g. the homeless) than specific individuals. In acting on my compassion, I try to do what will achieve the most good. This is as much a function of what my resources and abilities are, as what the needs are. I can't fix the world, but if I (and each of us) pick one or two areas where I (we) can actually make a difference, the world will be a better place.
    ^^This sounds very much like my approach to the world.

    Quote Originally Posted by fia View Post
    Empathy has a great deal to do with learning how to comprehend pain that is greater than what we have experienced personally and to not dismiss pain that is less than our own. If we can only feel others pain that matches our own, this is projection and not empathy. There is necessarily an element of relating our own personal experiences with those of others, but then being able to go beyond that to more closely match their actual experience. A person who has never been hungry with the fear of not being able to satisfy the hunger will be less likely to comprehend the nuance and depth of that experience. .
    This is very fascinating. I know that in myself I will tend towards the opposite of what you decsribe-when lacking information, I will over estimate the projected pain of the other person. The less I know of them, the more painful thier hurts are to me. The more I know someone, the more details I understand, the more I have been in their shoes, actually I can more accurately attune to thier emotional state-and determine if they do deserve empathy for that state. Often they actually desreve to be held accountable for how they ended up there, if they are to figure out a better course of action in the future.

    (This is not to say your statement is incorrect-the general premise of projection and empathy is quite brilliant, but I think it may be that, as often seen before in other places, enfps and infjs tend to diverge into opposite directions initially, before reaching very similar conclusions. We grow towards one another.)

    Quote Originally Posted by fia View Post
    I've noticed that when people pass judgment on others, it is often based on assumptions from their own life. They assume the person has whatever traits they would have to posses in their context to get the same result. Someone without temporal needs met must be lazy in the eyes of a person who only has to put forth a little effort to be paid and secure their food and shelter. The dynamic of actually being hungry and without shelter is complex and layered and involves more details than is easy to get one's head around without the actual experience.

    As human beings it is easiest to substitute projection for empathy, to assume the other person is like us when we experienced something similar. It is possible to broaden one's experience by hearing more details about the lives and suffering of others and to start to build a more complete conceptual framework of suffering that is different or extends beyond our own, but it is a skill that has to be developed like anything else.
    This is very wise.

  10. #40
    Senior Member ceecee's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by FunnyDigestion View Post
    I do tend to feel people's pain, & I wouldn't change it. It doesn't really make it harder to live, since it's a different feeling than inner depression. It just makes you feel more serious, less pointless.

    Yeah, i wouldn't change it. When i'm in a public place my attentions naturally draw to the person who seems the most fucked-up & miserable, & then I spend all my energy wondering what they're thinking about.
    Wait. You are saying that because you feel others pain, your life is less pointless? Then you waste all your energy wondering what they are thinking?
    I like to rock n' roll all night and *part* of every day. I usually have errands... I can only rock from like 1-3.

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