I've struggled with depression and I guess you could call it cyclothymia. Bad, nasty mood swings. Two people in me and they really don't get along well at all. There's nothing they won't stoop to in their fight for ascendancy over me!
I always feel like I'm swimming or running as fast as I can to keep "it" from catching up with me. I don't know what "it" is supposed to be but it's bad...something big, horrible...the point of total and complete collapse. Where I cannot function, where NOTHING is okay and will never be okay again no matter what. Okay...yes, I've had this happen but it passes...I'm afraid of this catching me and I never get up again.