Depression, yes. I believe I inherited the tendencies from my father's side. His mother was very likely bipolar as is my father. However, due to a strange tendency in both of them to be mentally incapable of admitting to faults or accepting responsibility, this has never been officially diagnosed. But the signs are all there, bright and glaring like giant neon signs. While I'm not bipolar, I do have issues with depression and it's something I have to actively work against.Do you suffer from it?
This biggest thing is I have trained myself to take each day one day at a time. This is very hard for me to generally do, as it's against my natural tendency to want to look forward and plan. But I can at least manage to keep one eye on the present and one eye on the future, and that's probably the best I'll ever do.How do you best cope with it?
Another thing is I refuse the drink alcohol because of what it does to me. I'm not a cool drunk. Hell, I'm a really boring, clammed up drunk who feels like offing herself as soon as the effects wear off. Therefore, no alcohol for me. Not that I ever really cared much about it in the first place.
Then there's training my mind to drop thoughts on command. Sometimes it doesn't work, but I can usually tell myself to let something go and imagine both the sensation of putting down a weight and that of falling, and it seems to help me push the issue to the back of my head, forget about it, or not feel anything in particular about it. But I HAVE to balance this with doing something positive. Otherwise, I end up stuck feeling dead and empty.
I have to admit, though. Sometimes that misery hurts so good I kind of chew on it for a while before trying to get rid of the feeling. It's like when you had braces and how your gums hurt after they were adjusted. It hurt, but you couldn't help clenching your teeth to cause that little bit of itchy pain. Because it felt good, like scratching an itch feels good.