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  1. #1
    SingSmileShine
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    Unhappy To any NF, especially ENFPs - are you frequently overwhelmed or depressed?

    Hello, everyone! I'm sure some of you have seen me around before, but if you haven't, I'm SingSmileShine. I'm an ENFP (pretty much to the T) and I want to be on Broadway. That's about it for me. (:

    Anyway, I suffer from severe OCD and generalized anxiety disorder. (I have a bit of an eating disorder, too, and IBS, which acts up under severe stress (which is frequently) but these two are just extraneous, besides the point). I know that these aren't things that everyone has, but I still feel like I want to connect to other people who have these things. As a result, even the tiniest bit of stress or sadness will lead me to have mental breakdowns, awful thoughts, and bouts of severe depression and overwhelmedness (is that a word)? I am a very happy person by nature (enneagram 7) but I am so easily subject to overwhelm and worry and stress and sadness that I'm starting to question who I am. I'm also a very tough person, but I feel so vulnerable sometimes - like my anxiety eats away at me until I have to cry in bed. I put on a brave face no matter where I go and fight through it, no matter what, and I have the most optimistic attitude about any suffering I go through, but I still want it all to get better. I know it will someday, but I'm so tired of waiting. Plus, there are a lot of external circumstances leading up to my sadness: lots of problems with my friends, maintaining a high GPA, many various extracurricular activities, crappy teachers, not being able to go to the gym as much as I like, etc.

    I really feel sometimes that the only time when I am happy is when I am at the gym I go to. I try to go every day, and it's always the best part of my day. I feel so rejuvenated. But whenever I have to leave, I'm always so sad and I just want to go back as soon as I start packing up to leave. I can't live at the gym, though, obviously. I also love singing, but even that isn't as fun because, for some reason, since September my life has been extremely rough and I can't find as much motivation or energy to go through with the things I used to love (and still love, just can't find the motivation for).

    I am on meds. They're just not working very well right now. /:

    I guess, for the most part, this was a rant to myself in order to vent off some steam. However, I would really, really love to know if any of you other NFs feel like this, and I especially ask you because I would love to hear some of your experiences, how you got through them, and I feel overall more comfortable ranting to my NF brethren/sistren because of all of your sweet personalities and caring natures.

    You are all lovely people, and I hope you all have lovely days!


  2. #2
    Senior Member animenagai's Avatar
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    I have OCD with thoughts. I do get overwhelmed by things, especially the concepts I'm OCD about. I think it's important to analyse WHY you're OCD about things. Enneagram has been wonderful for that. Things will get better
    Chimera of Filth

    A gruesome beast with dripping flesh
    Clings to me as a sick fixture
    My throbbing heart it gnawed apart
    It stalks and hunts me through mirrors

  3. #3
    Senior Member SubtleFighter's Avatar
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    I've had OCD for about three years now. I've probably had slight symptoms of it my whole life, but it didn't actually get bad until that point. It's a total bastard, I know. It's a whole lot better than it used to be, but it's not something that goes away entirely or that you ever stop fighting. It doesn't help me that I'm also enneagram 6.

    I also love musical theatre and Broadway

    PM me if you wanna talk some more about this.
    "Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the judgment that something else is more important than fear."--Ambrose Redmoon

    . . . metamorphosing . . .

  4. #4
    Member 31january's Avatar
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    I have no idea if i have OCD, but sometimes, i find that certain things can worry me out of proportion(whether it's a health/social issue), and that most of the time i can't relaly nejoy life unless the issue is resolved. distraction doesnt really work either, when an issue is there it's THERE throwing a shadow over the rest of my life, and it doesn't help if i KNOW that i'm (theoretically) worrying about something ridiculous. such times, i can be kinda moody, and probably puzzles my friends since i dont admit the (usually ridiculous) things i worry about =x but other times, when i'm finally free of any problems, i think i'm usually quite a cheerful and happy person! O__o

  5. #5
    Away with the fairies Southern Kross's Avatar
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    That sounds tough, bud

    Quote Originally Posted by SingSmileShine View Post
    I put on a brave face no matter where I go and fight through it, no matter what, and I have the most optimistic attitude about any suffering I go through, but I still want it all to get better. I know it will someday, but I'm so tired of waiting. Plus, there are a lot of external circumstances leading up to my sadness: lots of problems with my friends, maintaining a high GPA, many various extracurricular activities, crappy teachers, not being able to go to the gym as much as I like, etc.
    This is just how I cope too and I think it's very much the right approach. Hold on to that optimism and keep telling yourself it will get better. It will keep from descending into that dark place and counteract those irrational negative thoughts. I know what you mean about external circumstances; for so many years I've thought, "If I can just manage/get through this part aspect of my life, things would be so much better". This can be a positive way of thinking if you just focus on dealing with one minor problem at a time and conquering it - it will give the encouragement to keep going because you can see how you can have control over your situation and can overcome things, increment by increment. One thing I will say, don't hold out for magical solutions; I've done that a lot and it can be dangerous. Be aware that fixing those external factors won't get eliminate the problem (because they are always replaced by other problems) but instead that overwhelming feeling will slowly diminish - aim for making your situation manageable, not perfect.

    It's great that you exercise (it's supposed to help big time with depression ) and that it gives you such pleasure. I would suggest forcing yourself to take up your old interests even if you don't feel like it. It can be like taking up exercise after doing none for ages - the idea of it is so off putting but if you go through the motions anyway, you can regain the pleasure you previously took in it. This is difficult because your instincts can tell you the wrong thing, so sometimes you have to ignore them and push through to get the runner's high, so to speak - I've done this and it can really work. I read an article recently about will power; apparently it's crap and not very effective. What successfully gets people though things is distracting themselves from the source of their problem, not simply attempting to endure it. If you keep yourself busy and distracted with your interests, spending time with others or being productive in some way, you may start to think those thoughts less and less.
    INFP 4w5 so/sp

    I've dreamt in my life dreams that have stayed with me ever after, and changed my ideas;
    they've gone through and through me, like wine through water, and altered the colour of my mind.

    - Emily Bronte

  6. #6
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    I feel like a broken record at this point. But alot of this has to do with unconscious introverted sensing.

    An ENFP under stress suffers from Withdrawal and depression. Obsessiveness and a focus on a body.

    I think every ENFP in this page has mentioned a combination of those things. So, sorry for posting this a month late. But, the good news is that it gets better with time. The older and more developed you get the less these moods will strike you down.

    I think one of the hardest things about being an ENFP is that its impossible to tell if you're suffering from ADD and chronic depression or if you're just stuck with an inferior function episode.

    And to the OP. Physical Excercise is frequently cited by ENFP's as a way to get back to equalibrium.

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