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  1. #11
    Junior Member Saranghaeyo's Avatar
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    I understand how you feel, if I ran into one of my ex-boyfriends, I would want them to think... "Wow... She got hotter." Haha, of course I really do not care what they think, but I am not going to lie, encounters like that amuse me.

    For people close to me, I always want to look my best, so I do get hurt if they criticize something about my clothes, hair, or general appearance. For an INFP, I put a lot of effort into how I look, and it hurts when it goes unappreciated, or worse, gets criticized. I am not sure I get ticked off, I just get hurt. But sometimes it is good to have someone tell you you look kind of funny with that eyeliner on, or that sweater makes you look dumpy, but only if they are close to you. Random strangers or ex-boyfriends have no right to be saying negative things about other people's appearances.

  2. #12
    Senior Member animenagai's Avatar
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    Eh, who doesn't? This doesn't seem specific to type.
    Chimera of Filth

    A gruesome beast with dripping flesh
    Clings to me as a sick fixture
    My throbbing heart it gnawed apart
    It stalks and hunts me through mirrors

  3. #13
    an abyss of Nothingness Arctic Hysteria's Avatar
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    This doesn't sound much like a type issue to me. More like a jackass ex and an young/ eager to please girlfriend issue.
    The reason why I say that is because I am INFP to my fiber and HELL NO I would never change my appearance for anyone just to please them. Other true INFPs I know would never do that too.
    Why? Because INFPs would go to great lengths to please somebody ONLY if we are genuinely appreciated by the other person, drop by drop. It's us the people pleasers, it's also us the natural-born rebels.
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  4. #14
    Senior Member Forever_Jung's Avatar
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    Oh yeah definitely an INFP thing.

    As an ENFP, I love when my exes criticize my appearance in an arrogant, possessive way.

  5. #15
    an abyss of Nothingness Arctic Hysteria's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Forever_Jung View Post
    Oh yeah definitely an INFP thing.

    As an ENFP, I love when my exes criticize my appearance in an arrogant, possessive way.
    Are you sure, or this has much to do with age and experience too? Because I cannot recall a single INFP I know would do this.
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  6. #16
    Senior Member Forever_Jung's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Arctic Hysteria View Post
    Are you sure, or this has much to do with age and experience too? Because I cannot recall a single INFP I know would do this.
    I was kidding, you silly. Obviously it's not an INFP quirk to be insulted in the scenario she described. Almost anyone would be upset/insulted/annoyed by that interaction.

  7. #17
    an abyss of Nothingness Arctic Hysteria's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Forever_Jung View Post
    I was kidding, you silly. Obviously it's not an INFP quirk to be insulted in the scenario she described. Almost anyone would be upset/insulted/annoyed by that interaction.
    Silly me.
    Almost everyone would. Unfortunately young birds in love would do "anything" for love, abusive ones. Glad he's an ex.
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  8. #18
    Senior Member Hitoshi-San's Avatar
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    Your ex is a douchebag and a control freak. He had absolutely no business telling you "grow your hair back out again because I like it better that way". In fact, that sounds emotionally abusive, to me.

    I'm not one personally, but my little brother is an INFP. Even though he's < 12, he shows nearly all the personality traits of one. He likes to pull his pants up really high, and whenever told to pull them down slightly or questioned, he says, "Well, I like them that way!"

    A few years back, he was wearing a pair of swim trunks I thought looked a little big on him, but it's not like he couldn't grow into them over the course of another year or he couldn't cinch them tighter. I asked if he could try pulling the cinch more because they looked a bit too baggy. I didn't intend it to be a rude comment, but he was still very upset. I felt terrible

    But your ex's remark has NOTHING to do with type......anyone would find that offensive.

  9. #19
    Senior Member BAJ's Avatar
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    I've been shaving my head lately

  10. #20
    i love skylights's Avatar
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    I echo @Saranghaeyo, it hurts when someone whose opinion I care about criticizes my appearance. More than type, though, I think it relates to how much of themselves someone puts into their appearance and how much they care about the person who is criticizing.

    I think with an ex, even though that person isn't close anymore, at one point you cared a lot about their opinion and it's hard to just suddenly let go of that even if you want to. And yeah, in this case, his commentary was unkind and unnecessary. I think it probably was some of his old feelings of "belonging" rising to the surface. It can be painful to watch someone change without you after you've been close.

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