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  1. #21
    Riva
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    Quote Originally Posted by iwakar View Post
    Oh Riva. Your preoccupation with your INFJ love/hate conflict spans the typology sector of the internet and doubles back upon itself in strange ways, like a mobius strip.
    Very clever observation by you!

    The love, hate usually depends on the enneagram type I've noticed.

    Edit - hmmmmmmm...... maybe it's the ones that tolerate me vs the ones that don't or the ones I choose to be nice to vs the ones I don't care too much about.

  2. #22
    yap yap yap xenaprincess's Avatar
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    my INFJ friend at work doesn't hurt other ppl's feelings so often.
    He is generally overly sensitive toward others and spends his time miffed at someone else.

  3. #23
    Diving into Ni-space Crescent Fresh's Avatar
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    My ENTJ friend suddenly texted me and claimed that she had just got diagnosed of anxiety attack.

    I replied by saying sorry that I couldn't offer any help for any professional advice, and suggested her to see a psychiatrist soon to get treated.

    I supposed she got hurt by saying "Thanks. btw, I'm not crazy. Don't need to see psychiatrist"

    I explained to her that a psychologist has a doctoral-level degree in psychology and a psychiatrist has a degree in medicine. Anxiety level can be treated with medication just like depression.

    I thought my advice was genuine and realistic approach to solve her problem.

    She stopped contacting me and I assume I had hurt an ENTJ's feeling. *sigh*

  4. #24
    Senior Member typologywhore's Avatar
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    INFJ's...hurt people's feelings?!?!

    ... !! ...

    ... ._. ...

    ... ;_; ...



    ...I hope I don't but now I'm all uncertain-y... ;_;

  5. #25
    Senior Member Winds of Thor's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Riva View Post
    Noticed this happens accidentally to INFJs quite often.

    Other types maybe, make this mistake more often than INFJs.

    It is just that INFJs lament more?

    Or

    A Si failure on Riva's behalf?

    Or

    INFJs do hurt feelings quite often? (Accidentally or Deliberately)

    It's just too interesting how INFJs think they don't hurt people's feelings..

    They don't have any idea how badly they hurt others feelings (some of them, especially underdeveloped ones). How could they-they often stop at their personal perceptions inside without regard for opening their eyes and taking a look or even having the needed level of asking someone if or how bad they hurt them.

    Inner narcissism and INFJs should be a spin-off of this thread.
    "..And the eight and final rule: If this is your first time at Fight Club, you have to fight."
    'Men are meant to be with women. The rest is perversion and mental illness.'

  6. #26
    In orbit
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    Fair enough in a way, though I pretty much know what my poop smells like so to speak. sometimes I don't care if I've hurt someone's feelings because I'm angry... YES... ANGRY. but seriously... I know alot of different MBTI types and many have hurt my feelings ever so often, most unknowingly and few ever notice or apologize. I think it's just human. People are like that. There's just a HUGE amount of these kinds of threads on this forum and I just can't relate. Sorry. I think most INFJs are a little blunt at times, but I guess you've never met...well any other type. Let's say you calling INFJs as a group as inner narcissists. How hurtful is that? Or the sarcastic nasty title of this thread??? How is that not hurtful???? Just cause most INFJs are too polite to say you're being rude and hurtful yourself doesn't mean you're not. Take a LONG HARD LOOK IN THE MIRROR.

  7. #27
    Occasional Member Evan's Avatar
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    I don't always hurt people's feelings, but when I do, it's usually because I didn't explain something clearly.

    I'm pretty sensitive to other people's feelings, so I tend to err on the side of apologizing/re-explaining too much as opposed to too little. I'm sure I fail sometimes, but I'd guess that I hurt other people's feelings less than the average person.

  8. #28
    violaine
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lily flower View Post
    This is what happens to me.

    I say something in conversation that seems perfectly harmless.

    Later that night, in recalling the conversation I realize that what I said probably could have or was hurtful to the person.

    I am filled with horrible regret, because I would never want to hurt anyone.
    +1.

    I never intend to be mean in snarky ways. If I don't like someone, I don't interact with the person. My recurring problem is that I often don't see the negative way my comments could be perceived because I'm not of a personally critical mindset. (I pretty much think: to each their own. Unless someone is drawing a line under something and wants my input. Even in those instances, I will offer an opinion but I very rarely judge a person according to my own personal standards).

    It's actually pretty funny sometimes. It can result in the best snaps ever, had I intended to be snarky. What it does result in is late night explanatory texts to the other party. I'm notorious for that, heh.

  9. #29
    darkened dreams labyrinthine's Avatar
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    My employer told me i am the nicest person she has ever known, and she is not calibrated to give those kinds of compliments. She is extremely direct and offends people as a result, but is well meaning and one of the hardest working people I've ever known. I admire her. I'm not often offended by people which helps to cut down on hurting them, although I am aware of times I have hurt people. It is not on purpose, and I don't process anger that way. As the matter-of-fact I have a difficult time processing anger because I analyze the cause and effects of it to the point that I understand why each person acted as they did and so I'm not angry about in the same way I'm not angry if it snows to much. It can be frustrating, but it isn't personal. Very few interactions between people have enough comprehension of the person to even rate as personal.

    It is possible for there to be people who do not deliberately hurt others. For this to occur on a sincere, deep, honest level, it implies the person has the ability to respect and accept whomever they meet. It is that ability to respect people who are different, including those who do hurt people on purpose, that is the opposite of narcissism. The best way I know to be deeply kind is to let go of judgment and realize that harsh judgments are the result of pain and not truth. Looking deeper provides comprehension that makes judgment irrelevant.
    Step into my metaphysical room of mirrors.
    Fear of reality creates myopic morality
    So I guess it means there is trouble until the robins come
    (from Blue Velvet)

  10. #30
    Senior Member Winds of Thor's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Reverie View Post
    Fair enough in a way, though I pretty much know what my poop smells like so to speak. sometimes I don't care if I've hurt someone's feelings because I'm angry... YES... ANGRY. but seriously... I know alot of different MBTI types and many have hurt my feelings ever so often, most unknowingly and few ever notice or apologize. I think it's just human. People are like that. There's just a HUGE amount of these kinds of threads on this forum and I just can't relate. Sorry. I think most INFJs are a little blunt at times, but I guess you've never met...well any other type. Let's say you calling INFJs as a group as inner narcissists. How hurtful is that? Or the sarcastic nasty title of this thread??? How is that not hurtful???? Just cause most INFJs are too polite to say you're being rude and hurtful yourself doesn't mean you're not. Take a LONG HARD LOOK IN THE MIRROR.
    It would be stupid and really, really ignorant to call any group of MBTI any umbrella term that varies from person to person.
    "..And the eight and final rule: If this is your first time at Fight Club, you have to fight."
    'Men are meant to be with women. The rest is perversion and mental illness.'

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