Just joined the forum. I've been on here before, just to view the forums and learn, and you guys have been awesomely helpful. This seems like a great place to get some insight from INFJs, as I am in a predicament.
My best friend of two years is INFJ. I am INFP. He is the kindest, most respectful, most insightful person I have ever met. In conversation we connect on a level I have never experienced with anyone before. We can trust each other with anything. We know each other's strengths as well as each other's shortcomings (which we both have plenty of), and accept all. We have unbelieveably uncanny similarities, and it feels like we can see inside each other intuitively. We worked together for two years, so naturally neither of us ever made a move to be more than friends, although the chemistry has always been amazing, and we would each send each other signals of interest consistently. In April we stopped working together. In May, we started hanging out just the two of us. I left the country in June, and came back in August (we kept in touch while I was gone), and we started hanging out again. We sort of flirt with each other (as much as can be considered "flirting" between INFP and INFJ, neither one of which are exactly vivacious social butterflies!), but there has never been any talk of things going any farther than friendship. He's my best friend, I care about him immemsely, and am terrified at the thought of what could be lost I say something about wanting to be more than friends and it is not reciprocated. But I can't take this much longer. When you have this deep of a connection to someone, it's easy to seriously want more than friendship.
His eyes and body language and style of communication says he's interested in another level, but he hasn't said he that directly. Figured if he was interested he would just say it, but he's INFJ, and from the forums it seems like you guys often wait. One thing he did tell me though, is that he's not comfortable pursuing a woman, because when he pursues he always lets his feelings get away from him and ends up in disaster. He went on to say that if she wants to be more than friends, she'll say something to him.
I don't want to lose a best friend trying to gain a soulmate. BUT I don't want to miss out on a soulmate trying to save a friendship. You guys have always seemed to have good input for others on this forum facing similar situations. What is the best thing to do in this situation?
Thanks millions, INFJ's.
An INFP out of answers