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  1. #1
    Certified Sausage Smoker Elfboy's Avatar
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    Default Have any of you NF males mistaken yourselves for gay?

    I was going to name this thread "you're not gay; you're an NF male!" but that sounded a little extreme and I didn't want to deal with 50 "this thread is offensive!" posts.

    ...anyway
    have any of you NF males out there mistaken yourselves for gay and/or questioned your sexuality more than most men?
    ENFP: We put the Fi in Fire
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  2. #2
    Senior Member Mae's Avatar
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    ... How does one mistake themselves as gay? Is it like, "I sure wish he'd put his penis up my butt! Ohh, wait. No, I was just mistaken."?
    Anyway... my SF said that people just assumed he was gay growing up, females immediately stuck him in the friend zone, etc. But, I'm pretty sure he's never questioned his sexuality. Maybe it's just a common F male thing. A certain look and behaviors. It's been my observation that a lot of NF guys particularly have a "softness" about them. And as people tend to think of most gay men as effeminate...
    I got my smile from the sunshine,
    I got my tears from the rain.
    I learned to dance when I saw a tiger prance,
    And a peacock taught me to be vain.
    A little owl in a tree so high,
    He taught me how to wink my eye.
    I learned to bill and coo from a turtledove,
    And a grizzly bear taught me how to hug.
    But the guy that lived two caves from me,
    He taught me how to love.

  3. #3
    Senior Member Lily flower's Avatar
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    Of the guys I know, one INFP was told repeatedly throughout his life that he was gay. He says he is not, but he lived with his future wife for two years and never even tried to kiss her, so I don't know about that one.

    An ENFJ I know was not gay at all, but has been hit on by guys since high school. He is also over friendly and a few guys have thought maybe he was interested in them.

    Another ENFJ I know is not gay, but he has a lot of effeminite moves, a high squeaky voice, and is very relational with people.

  4. #4
    Senior Member Lily flower's Avatar
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    I should also say that those guys all say they have never questioned their sexuality, although I can't get in their brains. I think it's fairly easy not to question your sexuality when it lines up with what is societally accepted.

  5. #5
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    Ive questioned myself once when I met a man my age by the name of Courtney. Had this thing for hugging on and snuggling anything that laid down, didnt move, and was a human being. Mind you he spent a great deal more time trying this, successfully, on me, and it didnt bother me in the least. I came to terms later with the fact that Im not sexually attracted to men, and that I was just honestly surprised by his show of affection and lack of shame for social constructs. I think that more than any other factor caused me to question myself.

    Other than that? No. I should also state that INFJ men are the most likely candidates out of all types to be categorized as homosexual. Im the running punch line of a lot of gay jokes my male friends throw around. Not a bad thing, as they care for me as much as I care for them.

  6. #6
    Crazy Diamond Billy's Avatar
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    No never, I love women. Oh wait you mean to say being gay as in stereotypically having feelings and being in touch with my feminine side and all that?
    Ground control to Major Tom

  7. #7
    Senior Member animenagai's Avatar
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    lol kinda, yes. I like sensitive things like good chick flicks, musicals and I'm not afraid to show my emotions. Sometimes people misread that as being gay, and even though I know I'm not, sometimes my Ne goes 'hmmmmmm... I wonder'. I do find some guys attractive, but that just means that I can appreciate how they may do well in a dating setting or whatever, doesn't mean I want to bang them. So yeah, it's not really possible to not know your own sexuality, but I've wondered before.
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  8. #8
    Senior Member JivinJeffJones's Avatar
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    Short answer: no. Long answer: not really. I seem to recall a similar thread specific to infp males in which I put a bit more thought into an answer. If I find it I'll copy and paste.

  9. #9
    Post Human Post Qlip's Avatar
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    When I was 15 I seriously questioned my sexuality when I found myself highly identifying with a gay TV character. But, it didn't take too long for me to figure out that it was obvious that I like girls. I don't know how that compares to most men. The times are different, the association has a lot less taboo on it. I've noticed the younger crowd are a lot more open to exploration in that area.

  10. #10
    Secret Sex Freak Hazashin's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Elfboy View Post
    have any of you NF males out there mistaken yourselves for gay and/or questioned your sexuality more than most men?
    Of course not, the attractive women are too attractive for that!
    MBTI: INFP
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