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  1. #11
    resonance entropie's Avatar
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    PUA ?
    [URL]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tEBvftJUwDw&t=0s[/URL]

  2. #12
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    Quote Originally Posted by entropie View Post
    PUA ?
    It's a system men can supposedly use to be a man ho, but I don't see how it works because it's so transparent to any grown woman who has any real experience with men, and/or has an IQ over 90.

  3. #13

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    Quote Originally Posted by Esoteric Wench View Post
    "Dear INFJ Gentlemen, you are NOT ESTPs... So quit acting like it!"

    ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
    Let me be the first to point out that the above statement does not apply to all INFJ gentlemen. And the ones it does apply to, it doesn't apply all the time. Nonetheless, I feel like it has to be said.

    I've seen several INFJ gentlemen in my acquaintance act like the most obnoxious... well like really obnoxious ESTPs. (No offense to ESTPs. I'm not talking about a normal, mentally-healthy ESTP.) I'm talking about people acting out their shadow functions. According to Jung, everyone has a shadow aspect to their personality that consists of repressed weaknesses, shortcomings, and instincts. For an INFJ, their shadow functions are embodied in an ESTP's dominant functions.

    Some - but not all - of the behavior I've noticed includes blatant womanizing and a really annoying BMOC (big-man-on-campus) attitude. It's sort of like they are trying so hard... too hard... to not be the sweet, sensitive, quiet guys they were born to be.

    I've often thought that INFJ men were dealt a tough hand. In fact, our culture teaches men to be as un-INFJ as possible doesn't it? That's gotta be a real mind f*ck to the heterosexual male INFJ mindset.

    The same could be said for all NF males. But I think that INFJ and INFP males have a particularly tough time of it. But I've only noticed this "shadow embracing" pattern in INFJ males. (Admittedly my anecdotal evidence is based on a small sample set. There are so few INFJ males out there.)

    This won't be the first thread on how one struggles with being an NF male. And it won't be the last. I guess I was hoping for advice on how to be a good friend to my INFJ male friends when they are feeling the weight of society's expectations on them. Up until this point, the only thing I can think of is to whack 'em on the back of the head in the way Gibbs does to DiNozzo on NCIS.
    Damn, how do you know so many? I know what to look for and I cant spot other INFJs in the wild to save my life.
    "The purpose of life is to be defeated by greater and greater things." - Rainer Maria Rilke

  4. #14
    resonance entropie's Avatar
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    Ah I see,

    I take proteins to become a man

    [URL]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tEBvftJUwDw&t=0s[/URL]

  5. #15
    Undisciplined Starry's Avatar
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    Ha ha! This thread is starting to crack-me-up. I love it.

  6. #16
    Iron Maiden fidelia's Avatar
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    I'm with you on that iwaker! EJCC says they swarm around her though and Protean knows several, so maybe they hang around in clumps. I'm not sure if I've met another one in person or not.

  7. #17
    Intergalactic Badass mujigay's Avatar
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    I just think it's interesting that anyone found a male INFJ at all.

    I know three female INFJs. Not a single male. Damn.
    1w9 sx/sp
    A little song, a little dance, a little seltzer down your pants.

    All that is gold does not glitter
    Not all those who wander are lost

  8. #18
    resonance entropie's Avatar
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    From my "one day as an infp" perspective, I can tell that it is indeed not easy to survive in society as a man who may be more thoughtful. When you get older its easier to choose your friends, but especially in highschool and those times, you are basically a victim to all those bullies who wont ever leave Polk High. If you ward yourself off and cultivate a rough exterior, its no real escape cause you will out of insecurity have to shut off all your emotions, which does alienate you from people. If you tho still manage to be cool enough and funny enough that people still come to you, your emotions will be reflected in your actions; meaning what first was sensibility will turn into radicality. You'll turn into a danger to yourself and your decisions wont be rational, they will be emotional, volatile.

    I like Jane Austen so much, because when I read Pride and Prejudice and Mr.Darcy said that his problem is making contact to people, I felt understood for the first time in my life, cause I have the same problem. This problem has equally been my problem and my savior, cause I have projected in all my life an inpenetrable aura of mystery that noone ever tested my manhood, but left me alone and was happy when I greeted nicely. When I had my time in which I took drugs intensly, I lost control of projecting an outer self and my inner self came more out in the open. It was being left unattend for some years very volatile and unstructured yet that didnt stop me to always say when I didnt liked a thing. When people suddenly found out that I had strong principles, the image of the cool guy broke into pieces and before I knew it, this so called friends had turned their backs on me, labeling me as oversensitive or insane.

    There is no golden recipe to survive puberty or wise advice I could give thats a thing everyone has to figure out for themselves. You can just be there for those people and you dont need Dinosoing them like in Navy CIS that wont help them. Some ways people have to find alone, you can only be a guide.
    [URL]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tEBvftJUwDw&t=0s[/URL]

  9. #19
    Listening Oaky's Avatar
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    INFJs acting like ESTPs? INFJs often act like almost all MBTI types simply as reflections to their surroundings. INFJ minds often like to work in a 'collage' or 'discoball' form in which they tend to adhere to their surroundings to acquire continuous harmony and sometimes the highest possible position within the situation. ESTPs are only the most apparent because they often stand out the highest most in the social realm and INFJs would of course, know this. This is not to say they don't have their limitations that pull them back but perhaps best for another conversation.
    Judging by results received with their own descriptions of how their mind works, it mostly tends to be different versions of the same thing. INFPs would not often do this as they strive far more upon 'individuality' than reflective adherence.

  10. #20
    Sugar Hiccup OrangeAppled's Avatar
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    Thinking about how function roles could play out here....

    The inferior may serve as an antagonist to the person's mind. An antagonist can be positive or negative, but either way it stirs one to act (or think differently, in this case).

    Inferior Se in some INFJs leads them to reject Se-associated stuff as shallow or dull; they devalue that which they lack. My NFJ aunt fits this; she's enamored with being intellectual/cerebral & tends to unfairly see SPs as goofy & dense.

    However, in other INFJs, they desire what they lack & try to cultivate some Se-esque qualities. However, it is not natural for them to use Se, it conflicts with Ni too much, and so they turn to Fe to cultivate these Se-esque qualities. This is mostly good. Fe provides balance, but Se does not; wielding the inferior too long can be bad.

    An example: My INFJ is into cooking as a hobby. He tends to focus on getting the "best" ingredients, using the "right" method & tools, and perfecting the same recipe through repetition. It's so value-oriented it's hilarious, and these values are very externally sourced. Se-dom, IMO, tend to explore such things in the moment, spontaneously, with little concern for the "right" way as long as the end result is good. Not to say my INFJ doesn't enjoy the process, he does, but he's way more methodical about it than any SP I know. Frankly, I also think he likes the idea of these things more than anything...

    Quote Originally Posted by iwakar View Post
    Damn, how do you know so many? I know what to look for and I cant spot other INFJs in the wild to save my life.
    When you're a female NFP, male NFJs come out of the woodwork. I don't know that many in relation to say, ISFJs, but I know more than one or two. It's likely we get often close enough to type them, but not necessarily close to some other types to be able to type them (ie. I have few, but certainly some notable, ESTJs in my life because I don't tend to get close to them).
    Often a star was waiting for you to notice it. A wave rolled toward you out of the distant past, or as you walked under an open window, a violin yielded itself to your hearing. All this was mission. But could you accomplish it? (Rilke)

    INFP | 4w5 sp/sx | RLUEI - Primary Inquisitive | Tritype is tripe

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