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  1. #101
    Crazy Diamond Billy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Marmie Dearest View Post
    Not at all!

    Just quite possibly the most obnoxious NFJ on the face of the earth.

    I don't think her info is very objective, and she's kind of sketch in general...she told this guy on Personality Cafe not to tell anyone he was ISFP because of the way he'd be perceived.
    Wait wait, you are talking about objectivity? Hahahahahaa
    Ground control to Major Tom

  2. #102
    Crazy Diamond Billy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by IndyAnnaJoan View Post
    This is reminiscent of an INFJ male friend of mine. He often seems to have a very split personality. He's bisexual as well, and often seems to feel uncertain in whether to play out his feminine or masculine side. If it's just me and him, he can very easily fit in as one of the girls. But throw in one of our other male friends into the mix, and suddenly it's a cocky, militant version of him. I recall him talking about wanting to act like an ass to girls just for the sure sake of it, for power, for the upper hand, and because he believes people respect it more. I do often think that he sees himself as a social outcast. At times, I feel on edge around him because I don't know if he's playing nice or being deceitful. I'm a bit of a paranoid kind of person, and he can make me feel paranoid at times. I only really link INFJ's with having that true ability of weilding the double edged sword.
    Very interesting. I dont think bisexuality has anything to do with it, but I definitely believe that internally where I live in my mind I am nether male nor female, thats just window dressing I use depending on the company I am with. I am actually pretty androgynous, I think that is a Ni thing, someone else mentioned how INFJs adapt to their surroundings, I also agree with that, put me with a group of women and I will be sensitive etc, put me with a group of carpenters from Brooklyn and I will act like a douche from the movie goodfellas. Its not that those are fake versions of me, just different aspects of who I am and depending on who I am with it comes out.
    Ground control to Major Tom

  3. #103
    Riva
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    What type is billy? And why does he get so pissed when he is called an INTJ?

    Why doesn't anyone like INTJs except Satine?

    Who taught Marmie MBTI?

    Most of the posts should be moved to either one of those threads.

  4. #104
    Crazy Diamond Billy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Riva View Post
    What type is billy? And why does he get so pissed when he is called an INTJ?

    Why doesn't anyone like INTJs except Satine?

    Who taught Marmie MBTI?

    Most of the posts should be moved to either one of those threads.
    I'm INFJ and I dont get pissed when people call me an INTJ, I get annoyed when 1 person in particular calls me an INTJ because she doesn't do it for objective reasons she does it because she thinks it gets to me, it doesn't, I personally love INTJs and I wish I was Te based instead of Fe based my life would be 100X easier.
    Ground control to Major Tom

  5. #105
    Riva
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    ^ True that. The world is a much much easier place when one is a INTJ. Peer pressure doesn't mean shit (unless they do have a point) and decisions come easy, easier to INTJs than to any other type there is. And they are the most confident type. So I wouldn't disagree with you when you say your life would be easier if you're an INTJ. And mind you they are also the most successful. I'm yet to see an unsuccessful INTJ.

    But the rest of the world would think you're weird. But if you're a INTJ, you wouldn't notice .

    And Marmie's typing isn't the best. So if she thinks you're an INTJ, you're probably a ESFP.

  6. #106
    Artisan Conquerer Halla74's Avatar
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    The best thing ANYONE (male or female) can do on ANY DATE (first, second, third, etc.) is BE THEMSELVES.

    There is always a certain amount of "nervous" or "giddy" energy surrounding a first date, because once is excited at the prospect of finding a new person to love and be loved by.

    BUT - in no way shape or form is that prospect served by pretending to be something you are not.

    For instance, I might be a full blown ESTP, and a loon, and a bit zany, but those are just brief moments in time where those aspects of my personality are interjected throughout my day to keep things light and fun, instead of drab and boring.

    Far beyond being a comedian and a silly fellow, I am a gentleman, I am a romantic, I am an optimist, and I am a big believer that chivalry and courtship still exist although in terms more appropriate for the times we live in than when men draped their cloaks over mud puddles for ladies to walk over.

    Guys, regardless of your MBTI type, let me give some advice for a first date with a woman you have a strong interest in:

    (1) Bring flowers!
    (2) Dress well, but leave the tuxedo at home.
    (3) Go easy on the cologne, or skip it, just be clean, and well groomed, no Mafia hair gel.
    (4) Get your damn car cleaned, if not detailed beofre the date.
    (5) Open the door for her and let her get seated comfortably in your car, once she appears to be comfortable, make eye contact, smile, and close the door for her.
    (6) Get in the car, don't blast the fucking stereo. Either keep it off and talk to her, or keep it at a volume low enough that you can converse with her. Focus on her, and not the 1,800 watt sound system.
    (7) Wherever you are going, be sure to open the door for her to let her out of the car, and shut it for her.
    (8) Open the door for her to wherever you are going (let's say a nice restaurant in this example) and then follow her in.
    (9) Hopefully you made reservations, or got there early, if you did not, don't be a fool and sit outside on a metal bench with a pger-coaster that alerts you when your table is ready. Go buy her a drink and/or an appetizer at the bar if she's hungry.
    (10) During dinner remember the following: You have TWO EARS and ONE MOUTH, so LISTEN TWICE as much as you SPEAK. Learn about her, don't be a bloody fool and stampede all over the conversation about your whole life. Communication is a TWO WAY endeavor.
    (11) If she's cool with it, pay the tab, especially if you asked her out. YOU ASKED, so YOU PAY. If she wants to go Dutch, then don't argue with her, you will lose. ;-)
    (12) If you do the above, smile, and be yourself, you will most likely have a very succcessful first date, regardless of your MBTI type.
    (13) When it's time to take her home, it's your job to figure out when to kiss her goodnight. If she doesn't want to kiss you, you'll know, but you'll still likely get a hug, unless you creeped her out somewhere during the date. Where it all goes from there is up to you. If you have an interest in a woman, pursue her, but do so like a gentleman, and not like a creep or a stalker.
    (14) Remember, even if the whole endeavor fails, you got two very important things out of it: (A) You will have learned a few things, and (B) You'll never have to look back on your life and have regrets "What if I did ask her out that summer?" will not be a question you ponder on alone in a nursing home. Instead, you might be holding the hand of the love of your life on a beach sipping Mai Thai's together on your 80th birthdays. I know which option I'd rather have as part of my life...

    MBTI + DATING = FAIL
    DATING + ROMANCE = WIN!!!



    -Halla
    --------------------
    Type Stats:
    MBTI -> (E) 77.14% | (i) 22.86% ; (S) 60% | (n) 40% ; (T) 72.22% | (f) 27.78% ; (P) 51.43% | (j) 48.57%
    BIG 5 -> Extroversion 77% ; Accommodation 60% ; Orderliness 62% ; Emotional Stability 64% ; Open Mindedness 74%

    Quotes:
    "If somebody asks your MBTI type on a first date, run". -Donna Cecilia
    "Enneagram is psychological underpinnings. Cognitive Functions are mental reasoning and perceptional processes. -Sanjuro

  7. #107
    Crazy Diamond Billy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Riva View Post
    ^ True that. The world is a much much easier place when one is a INTJ. Peer pressure doesn't mean shit (unless they do have a point) and decisions come easy, easier to INTJs than to any other type there is. And they are the most confident type. So I wouldn't disagree with you when you say your life would be easier if you're an INTJ. And mind you they are also the most successful. I'm yet to see an unsuccessful INTJ.

    But the rest of the world would think you're weird. But if you're a INTJ, you wouldn't notice .
    I have a lot of respect the way they use Te, like moving pawns around the chessboard, only instead of only using people like I tend to do and INFJs tend to do they utilize resources and assets, they always have some backup plan and some funding squirreled away somewhere, I tend to just rely on people I know who I know can help, but thats not as effective because I have to dump a TON of personal time and resources into maintaining all that and then sometimes they just dont want to help... leaving me frustrated and feeling betrayed.
    Ground control to Major Tom

  8. #108
    4x9 cascadeco's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Billy View Post
    I have a lot of respect the way they use Te, like moving pawns around the chessboard, only instead of only using people like I tend to do and INFJs tend to do they utilize resources and assets, they always have some backup plan and some funding squirreled away somewhere, I tend to just rely on people I know who I know can help, but thats not as effective because I have to dump a TON of personal time and resources into maintaining all that and then sometimes they just dont want to help... leaving me frustrated and feeling betrayed.
    Well, and I tend to have backup plans and my own funding / self-sufficiency, and tend not to rely on people, but I believe myself to have an Fe preference over Te preference. In my case, I think a lot of my own tendencies are the result of enneagram (e5 sp) in conjunction with infj. I think enneagram (as well as other aspects of personality; after all, mbti is only one construct) plays a big role in the 'flavor' of mbti type one falls into. This is all to say... INFJ's as well as any other type can vary quite a bit, esp. behaviorally, based on many other factors.
    "...On and on and on and on he strode, far out over the sands, singing wildly to the sea, crying to greet the advent of the life that had cried to him." - James Joyce

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  9. #109
    Senior Member IndyGhost's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Billy View Post
    Very interesting. I dont think bisexuality has anything to do with it, but I definitely believe that internally where I live in my mind I am nether male nor female, thats just window dressing I use depending on the company I am with. I am actually pretty androgynous, I think that is a Ni thing, someone else mentioned how INFJs adapt to their surroundings, I also agree with that, put me with a group of women and I will be sensitive etc, put me with a group of carpenters from Brooklyn and I will act like a douche from the movie goodfellas. Its not that those are fake versions of me, just different aspects of who I am and depending on who I am with it comes out.
    You know, I had always seen him as being a more androgynous person, and wondered if bisexuality developed due to this. I've also wondered if bisexuality was more prevalent amongst NF's than any other type. My experience with NF's has shown that they are generally more comfortable with "taboo" than most. ENFP's and INFJ's especially.

    I'm moving away from topic though. I don't know about the ESTP shadow, necessarily. But perhaps more confusion with gender role, audience, and desire for respect can make the INFJ male I know go from sweet as a kitten best buddy to mean, gun toting, fire spitter. I still love the kid and will always be there to support him as I know he generally means well. But I can't always be around him.
    "I don't know a perfect person.
    I only know flawed people who are still worth loving."
    -John Green

  10. #110
    this is my winter song EJCC's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Billy View Post
    I'm INFJ and I dont get pissed when people call me an INTJ, I get annoyed when 1 person in particular calls me an INTJ because she doesn't do it for objective reasons she does it because she thinks it gets to me, it doesn't, I personally love INTJs and I wish I was Te based instead of Fe based my life would be 100X easier.
    Okay, you've got me convinced that you're INFJ. I've been observing your debate with her for a little while and I can tell you with 100% certainty that Marm does not try to "get to" people. Maybe I'm reading her wrong, but I feel like I know her pretty well and can safely say that she doesn't have ulterior motives. Like anyone with strong and communicative Te, she is blunt and honest and not the sort of person to even consider messing with people's heads. Te/Fi and manipulation, from my experience, don't usually go together.

    Speaking as someone who is friends with many, many INFJs, I know that they have a tendency to over-analyze some people, when they should be taken at face value. That's why I love INFJs, is that we consider very different things to be "obvious" and are therefore great sources of advice to each other. And one thing that I eternally have to convince my INFJ friends of, is the fact that no, these people aren't out to get them.

    When Marm thought she was INFJ, everyone who knew anything about MBTI on this forum knew she was wrong, because of her Fi/Te. Whatever type she is, she is an F and she has Fi and Te x1,000. So don't assume that she's using unhealthy-Fe tactics, because she isn't -- just like I wouldn't, or any number of other people similar to Marm (e.g. shortnsweet, Little Linguist) wouldn't.

    So please, let's all calm down and take the issue at surface value.
    ~ g e t f e s t i v e ! ~


    EJCC: "The Big Questions in my life right now: 1) What am I willing to live with? 2) What do I have to live with? 3) What can I change for the better?"
    Coriolis: "Is that the ESTJ Serenity Prayer?"



    ESTJ - LSE - ESTj (mbti/socionics)
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