[NF] NF Value Judgement on Others

[Crescent Fresh]

How do you judge people between good and bad?

Everytime when you first get to know someone after a significant period of time, we often implement our judgment on them. Though I'm curious to see what would catch your attention the most?



The Good:
1. Someone who is not tied down by society's constructs.
2. Confidence and politeness that goes hand-in-hand.
3. Abillity of seeing goodnes in everybody, or naivity.
4. Openmindedness and able to share and talk about their deep, inner-feelings.
5. How they treat their family members, including siblings and especially mothers (because we all know it's never an easy task to deal with our mothers)

The Bad:
1. Rudness, even if it's unconsciously delivered.
2. Speaking ill of someone and have a tendency to persuade others within the same group.
3. Being too clingy. This should be a known fact that clinginess will not bring you anywhere in any relationship.
4. Narrow-minded.
5. Negative people. I recently learned how to detach from them. I'm okay with those people who need to vent, but not to those people who often felt hopeless or felt excessively pessimistic about future. Those people can really mentally drain out my energy.

 

[Qlip]

I never actually think of people being bad.. maybe they're bad for me or they're going about things the wrong way, but they're never bad people.

Things that make me want to distance myself from people:

1. Has given up on life. Not interested in striving for something better.
2. Has no empathy, sees people as means to ends.

Hmmm.. it is a short list, but even the most abrasive person has promise if they have these two things.

 

[Crescent Fresh]

Things that make me want to distance myself from people:

1. Has given up on life. Not interested in striving for something better.
2. Has no empathy, sees people as means to ends.

Hmmm.. it is a short list, but even the most abrasive person has promise if they have these two things.

It seems those two points you have listed is rather universal among all ENFPs.

Though I'm interested in your first point, as that's what I focus on helping people realize that they just have to discover their passions, or at least, what they're good at. I felt most people who seems rather directionless in life has to do low self-esteem issue. Having a teaching career made me realized that many kids got blindsighted because of their parents are damn good at puppet-tiering.

Since most ENFPs are known as inspirers, I thought they might be able to tolerate to deal with low-spirited people. Does it have to do with too much of emotional energy draining?

 

[CrystalViolet]

I don't know. I use my instincts I guess. I'm not often wrong. It seems black and white thinking to other people, but they aren't in my head.
I usually know with in the first five minutes of meeting them. I have a feeling, this is a INFP trait.

 

[Qlip]

It seems those two points you have listed is rather universal among all ENFPs.

Though I'm interested in your first point, as that's what I focus on helping people realize that they just have to discover their passions, or at least, what they're good at. I felt most people who seems rather directionless in life has to do low self-esteem issue. Having a teaching career made me realized that many kids got blindsighted because of their parents are damn good at puppet-tiering.

Since most ENFPs are known as inspirers, I thought they might be able to tolerate to deal with low-spirited people. Does it have to do with too much of emotional energy draining?

Well.. hmmm. I'm kind of a late bloomer, I suppose I don't feel like have the resources to deal with other people as well as myself. I do once in a while want to try to get people on their feet, trying to show them a way out. But doing it right requires a commitment of self that I don't feel like I've had command of until now. So, I'm just not typical ENFP is all.

It definitely is a shame how kids can be held down by their own parents.