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  1. #81
    nee andante bechimo's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by wolfy View Post
    I think it is liberating to feel you only appeal to some people. In all aspects of yourself.

    I don't fully understand what feminine or sensitive men actually do so I don't have much to say on that. I feel balanced masculine/feminine is actually most attractive. It's more the indulgent, spray it all over everybody side of both that is unappealing.
    And yet you're an F man where F stands for fan club!

  2. #82
    Certified Sausage Smoker Elfboy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by wolfy View Post
    I think it is liberating to feel you only appeal to some people. In all aspects of yourself.

    I don't fully understand what feminine or sensitive men actually do so I don't have much to say on that. I feel balanced masculine/feminine is actually most attractive. It's more the indulgent, spray it all over everybody side of both that is unappealing.
    seriously. super unbalanced masculine is disgusting
    ENFP: We put the Fi in Fire
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  3. #83
    Diving into Ni-space Crescent Fresh's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by 21% View Post
    I think society is putting too much pressure on guys conform to the stereotypes. But, at least it's getting better now, so I we're definitely moving forward. It shouldn't matter that much to be 'masculine' as it is to be 'healthy', and knowing and accepting yourself and being unafraid to show it is a sure sign of 'healthiness'
    Actually, I think you're right! I still remember I've taken a course of "Gender and Media" during college years and my professor claim that both genders have much more personal freedom of self-expressions, particularly when slender, non-muscular men were not seen as popular back in the 80s (she made a side-by-side comparison of Arnold and one of those Dior "ultra-slim" male models). The emergence of metrosexuals, or the emos really have changed the overall conception of masculinity.

    I've also found most of my friends are completely turned off by 'macho' or muscle-flexing types kind of guy. Of course, there will be always demand for those ultra-masculine men who can mimic the walks of penguins, but I still prefer men with sentimentality overall. A man who builds his goal based on his dream of values, in stead of being followed by societal norms.

  4. #84
    Diving into Ni-space Crescent Fresh's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by CzeCze View Post
    I think Fi heavy men are going to be more of a disadvantage for the 'traditional masculine' route, which of course, is BS. But self-reflection and showing (let alone having) empathy is a huge no-no in traditional gender role-ing for men.
    That's true. And perhaps that's why they tend to be hotheaded when they're in conflicts. It's like watching a volcano errupting at any moments during confrontation even. I know that for ENFPs, when they're experiencing conflicts, they tend to take it as personally as INFJs. Though for INFJs it seems more like one-on-one kind of thing. Based on my work experience, I've witnessed a few ENFP/ENFJ females tend to convince as many people to agree to take their sides. But when a "male" ENFP/ENFJ do this excessively (or sometimes, dramatically), it can really look rather distasteful--especially when compared to their usual image of being merry-go-around, people-oriented inspirers. It really dropped my jaw whenever this happens.


    I also remember an ISFP male friend and he was so nice and also masculine.
    That's spot-on! I think ISFP male are very comfortable with their masculinity and feminitity by not taking things too seriously in general. I felt SP types are very laid-back and yet relaxed. The only thing is it seems they're not interested in establishing a deeper connections like NFs do. So it's really difficult to get to know them besides having a good times socializing with them.

  5. #85
    nee andante bechimo's Avatar
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    Empathy is frowned upon in men? Wut?

  6. #86
    Diving into Ni-space Crescent Fresh's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by iwakar View Post
    Appearance should be factored into people's perceptions because accurate or not they play a huge part.
    I agree, but to me, voice tone is the deciding factor.

    Some men can look very masculine but once they speak, you felt somewhat dislocated, such as David Beckham.

    ENFP seem to help appearing more 'masculine' by their goofiness and all the 'creative' gestures by looking more animated than other NF types.

  7. #87
    Diving into Ni-space Crescent Fresh's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mask Manifest View Post
    I don't think most male NFs resent the so-called "feminine" aspects of their personality. They resent the fact that women aren't attracted to them because of it.
    This is interesting. I still remembered it's very difficult for me to turn this guy down (whom I suspect is an INFJ) after writing the sweetest confession letter to me during high school. The chemistry just wasn't there and I tried to be very nice to him and expressed my wish for remaining friends as the feeling wasn't mutual. That's when he started to keep a distance with me and eventually disconnected.

    I would rather want to have things happened naturally and always thought it's for the best interests between two people. I think for most resentment comes from lack of confidence. As I've seen confident ENFJ can easily take no from girls and move on to the next target. Perhaps ENFPs will try harder if they viewed disinterested as a form of challenge.

  8. #88
    Certified Sausage Smoker Elfboy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by 21% View Post
    I had a classmate back in junior high who would be the first one to bawl at anything -- sad songs, sad movies, partings. I thought he was awesome

    I think society is putting too much pressure on guys conform to the stereotypes. But, at least it's getting better now, so I we're definitely moving forward. It shouldn't matter that much to be 'masculine' as it is to be 'healthy', and knowing and accepting yourself and being unafraid to show it is a sure sign of 'healthiness'

    (I think TJ girls have the same problem -- but reversed)

    Actually, now that I think about it I'm not really sure what 'masculine' and 'feminine' even mean anymore...
    I think society puts pressure on guys to conform to the wrong masculine traits
    - aggression
    - impulsiveness
    - toughness
    - having lots of sex
    - disgusting amounts of muscle

    as opposed to the right ones
    - responsibility
    - ambition
    - productivity
    - confidence
    ENFP: We put the Fi in Fire
    ENFP
    5w4>1w9>2w1 Sx/Sp
    SEE-Fi
    Papa Bear
    Motivation: Dark Worker
    Alignment: Chaotic Neutral
    Chibi Seme
    MTG Color: black/red
    Male Archtype: King/Lover
    Sunburst!
    "You are a gay version of Gambit" Speed Gavroche
    "I wish that I could be affected by any hate, but I can't, cuz I just get affected by the bank" Chamillionaire

  9. #89
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jenaphor View Post
    For certain, I'm not universally attractive. That is fact.
    Jenaphor digs Juice's NFness. That is also fact.

  10. #90
    nee andante bechimo's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Juice View Post
    Jenaphor digs Juice's NFness. That is also fact.
    Ha ha...Juice is juicy!

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