User Tag List

First 6141516171826 Last

Results 151 to 160 of 342

  1. #151
    Anew Leaf
    Guest

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by cascadeco View Post
    Well, not to pull the age card, but I'm almost 33, and I am pretty sure where I'm at now, in terms of how I process things and 'operate' is bit more finetuned/layered than it was at 23, and certainly as a teenager. So I think it can be harder as you grow older to sift through more of your instinctual responses (or even be aware of what those pure instinctual responses might have been, because the pure isn't so relevant anymore), vs. the more nuanced responses based on experience and just added years or changing perceptions (or whatever) - because the nuanced becomes the reality, and becomes you.

    It's kinda like... on these forums it might be more simplistic to try to speak of Cognitive functions as isolated things, but the reality is that when you throw a second function on top of that one, and then a third, and then a fourth, it becomes further nuanced so that the Bare-bones definition of the isolated function may not even be applicable at all to the resulting product/self... because the other functions end up adding to it/ modifying such that it's no longer as black&white as it was in its isolation.

    As such:


    Agreed.
    What I mean by growing into it is that I was pushed by my mom to be more social and to ask people how they are, and to think of others, etc. It was a combination of getting older (not being a self-absorbed teen anymore) and purposely working on being more social in ways that didn't naturally occur to me. Maybe that doesn't make sense, but it is where I was coming from.

  2. #152

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by jixmixfix View Post
    I think it can be, every time I see someone with strong Fe I wonder why they are trying to be so nice. Furthermore they are always so pushy in promoting their Fe in others.
    End thread.
    "The purpose of life is to be defeated by greater and greater things." - Rainer Maria Rilke

  3. #153
    4x9 cascadeco's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Enneagram
    4 so/sp
    Posts
    6,932

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Saturned View Post
    What I mean by growing into it is that I was pushed by my mom to be more social and to ask people how they are, and to think of others, etc. It was a combination of getting older (not being a self-absorbed teen anymore) and purposely working on being more social in ways that didn't naturally occur to me. Maybe that doesn't make sense, but it is where I was coming from.
    Oh, absolutely. Nurture impacts things for sure, and then what we end up deciding to work on for our own growth.
    "...On and on and on and on he strode, far out over the sands, singing wildly to the sea, crying to greet the advent of the life that had cried to him." - James Joyce

    My Photography and Watercolor Fine Art Prints!!! Cascade Colors Fine Art Prints
    https://docs.google.com/uc?export=do...Gd5N3NZZE52QjQ

  4. #154
    Member
    Join Date
    Jul 2011
    MBTI
    INFJ
    Posts
    39

    Default

    Fe is a very complicated issue, I think. It has four manifestations, two as dominant functions and two as auxiliary functions. We need to carefully assess how Fe works as a dominant for ENFJs and ESFJs, how Fe operates as an auxiliary for INFJs and ISFJs.
    We must revere nothing if reverence means rigidity, paralysis of inquiry.
    We must revere everything that sincere men revere, if reverence means
    respect made mobile by curiosity and flexible by modesty.

    Charles Hartshorne, Beyond Humanism:
    Towards a Philosophy of Nature

  5. #155
    Senior Member INTPness's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    MBTI
    INTP
    Enneagram
    5w4
    Posts
    2,158

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Resonance View Post
    So basically what you're saying is "Fe is fake because it doesn't match the output of my other function [Ti]".

    That's a bit like saying oranges are fake because they don't look like bananas.
    No, I don't think that's an accurate comparison. If we don't analyze my individual functions - if we just look at me as a person in that moment and ask what I'm thinking or how I feel, the answer would be "I'm feeling very angry, pissed, disrespected, and I want to express that anger to those people." But, instead, I just use Fe and am nice to them (for the sake of social harmony). As I said, it is both fake and non-fake at the same time. It's not fake because I really do want social harmony. It is fake because I'm surpressing my true feelings/thoughts of anger and frustration, but I'm sort of "pretending" that everything is cool. I mean, if we're being real here - there's an element of fakeness about that, IMO.

    Quote Originally Posted by Saturned View Post
    No, what he is saying is that his real (ti) reaction is that he is annoyed, but he covers it up (fe) with being pleasant.
    Right. Saturned understood what I was getting at. It's the "covering up" of Ti that gives it an element of fakeness. I'll say it again though - my contention is not that Fe is "totally fake". My contention is that Fe has good intentions and it definitely serves a purpose (I like my Fe) - but there is "an element" of fakeness in the way it acts sometimes. That's all - no reason to take offense.

    Quote Originally Posted by Resonance View Post
    That's not fake though, Fe reflects his desire for harmony and smooth relations and 'getting on with it'. Just because Fe doesn't reflect his inner experience doesn't mean it's fake, that's not what it's for.
    This is a good point. I see what you're saying here and it makes sense. There's still that "covering over" of the "real thoughts of Ti" that show some fakeness.

    How about this? How about the Fe-dom who always wants to portray a really good image to their neighbors (e.g., the "image" that my marriage is perfect, my husband makes a lot of money, our family has everything together, my kids are angels, we have no problems, etc.). I've seen this more than once in Fe-doms and, frankly, it's quite fake. It's fake because I can see how hard they try to portray this image, but in reality, it's a facade - it's a mirage - and you see the truth behind it that sometimes doesn't match up with what they are portraying.

    So, I maintain that Fe *can be* fake at times.
    NTJ's are the only types that have ever made me feel emo.
    ENP's are the only types that have ever made me feel like a sensor.


    There are two great days in a person's life - the day we are born and the day we discover why. --William Barclay

  6. #156
    The High Priestess Amargith's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    MBTI
    Enfp
    Enneagram
    497 sx/so
    Socionics
    IEE Fi
    Posts
    14,658

    Default

    Would it be accurate to say that you frame the convo one-on-one you have with a person in an attempt to empathize with them and help them out within Fe-social niceties? You'll still make sure it's all about them (where NeFi-users are known to be more likely to interject and volunteer similar experiences in order to relate), so that you don't steal their spotlight, you ask them how they are, you go through the steps of social appropriateness to see if they're open to even wanting to discuss this with you, before you get to the core, you give them a reality check and try to stabilize their perspective by gently reminding them that the world isn't all about them and that it's not out to get them, etc etc.

    Does that at all ring true?
    ★ڿڰۣ✿ℒoѵℯ✿ڿڰۣ★





    "Harm none, do as ye will”

  7. #157
    hypersane Hive's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2010
    Posts
    1,005

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Pan-en-theist View Post
    Fe is a very complicated issue, I think. It has four manifestations, two as dominant functions and two as auxiliary functions. We need to carefully assess how Fe works as a dominant for ENFJs and ESFJs, how Fe operates as an auxiliary for INFJs and ISFJs.
    ... and tertiary for ExTP's and inferior for IxTP's. ExTP's are claimed to be able to manipulate well and are stereotyped as con men.

  8. #158
    figsfiggyfigs
    Guest

    Default

    They're not exclusive.

  9. #159
    Member
    Join Date
    Jul 2011
    MBTI
    INFJ
    Posts
    39

    Default

    Can we drop the word "fake"? Nothing is fake in typology. Fake, as in not having meaning or reality. The extreme E..FJs (with no developed auxiliary) are truly acting in the reality of their convictions. If Fe seems fake to you, then drop it out of the chart. Try that. What happens?
    We would have anarchy. There would be no civilization. If we're going to live in peace, Fe and Te are going to make it happen. Those extraverted judging functions may be conforming and restricting, but, at the very least, you need something to bounce your individualism off.
    I say that after sixty years of intense individuality (Ni) trying to coming to terms with society's needs (Fe)
    We must revere nothing if reverence means rigidity, paralysis of inquiry.
    We must revere everything that sincere men revere, if reverence means
    respect made mobile by curiosity and flexible by modesty.

    Charles Hartshorne, Beyond Humanism:
    Towards a Philosophy of Nature

  10. #160
    Senior Member INTPness's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    MBTI
    INTP
    Enneagram
    5w4
    Posts
    2,158

    Default

    Nobody is saying that Fe isn't valuable to people's personalities. I know it's valuable to mine and I'd be intolerable without it. It's just an honest, open discussion about some of Fe's drawbacks. No big deal. People rip on Ti all the time for its "uselessness". Well, guess what? It's my primary function. I know its value as well as anyone. And Fe users know the value of Fe. Nobody is saying that's its useless. We're just being honest and assessing some of its drawbacks - very real drawbacks. It doesn't need to be taken so personally.
    NTJ's are the only types that have ever made me feel emo.
    ENP's are the only types that have ever made me feel like a sensor.


    There are two great days in a person's life - the day we are born and the day we discover why. --William Barclay

Similar Threads

  1. Is it just me or is Fe really cheesy and ummm kinda gay.
    By jixmixfix in forum The Fluff Zone
    Replies: 35
    Last Post: 04-09-2013, 11:42 AM
  2. [Fe] Fe is fake and manipulative (proofs inside)
    By INTP in forum The NF Idyllic (ENFP, INFP, ENFJ, INFJ)
    Replies: 17
    Last Post: 07-21-2011, 01:04 AM
  3. Either Fe is blindsiding me, or I'm seriously an ENFP...
    By Kenneth Almighty in forum What's my Type?
    Replies: 16
    Last Post: 05-21-2010, 09:17 PM
  4. [Fe] Fe users (or anyone): How do you break away from values instilled from a young age?
    By Glycerine in forum The NF Idyllic (ENFP, INFP, ENFJ, INFJ)
    Replies: 17
    Last Post: 07-08-2009, 11:22 PM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
Single Sign On provided by vBSSO