I didn’t really know where to turn so I thought that fellow INFJ’s might be able to help.
I’ve been feeling an extraordinary amount of stress over the past few years. Unable to find a FT job, I have several PT jobs which involve working in the helping professions. I find myself burnt out, absent-minded (which I tend to be, but I’ve noticed it’s interfering with my work), and just messing up all around (e.g., not remembering things, messing up assignments, performing below standards, etc). Add to that my INTJ partner has been emotionally unavailable and MIA for certain moments, as well, so I’ve been especially sensitive at those times.
At this point, I want to say “screw it” and just throw everything to the wind. I really don’t know how to cope with everything that’s going on. I am a bit reserved so don’t have many close friends - I don’t think anyone gets what’s going on with me. I wish I didn’t have so many responsibilities and wish I could just be carefree, but I feel like I’ve worked up in my positions for so long it would be ridiculous to throw away all that I’ve worked for. It honestly seems like everything is going wrong and I can’t seem to change my shortcomings. I also don’t know how to deal with my partner choosing to be alone (sometimes for a long period) when we have a big argument. I’m afraid if this relationship were to evolve into something more serious, he might just abandon me out of the blue. It makes me feel like he’s not invested in the relationship. Sometimes when we’re arguing, he mentions things he’s been feeling that he failed to mention before and I’m like “where did that come from?” When I try to ask how he’s feeling at other times, he rarely brings it up. I don’t feel a sense of maturity, and what kills me is the coldness and the attitude that he can do without me...that I'm crazy for getting emotional.
Anyway, I know I went on a little bit but I'm feeling really overwhelmed...