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  1. #1
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    Default When do you ENFJs open up?

    I'm dating an ENFJ now, for 5 mths.

    He opened up and confessed to me about his inner struggles, after I confronted him on some bad behavior. (i discovered him asking other girls out. it's an addiction.)

    I didn't realise how big a deal this is until I read this forum saying that ENFJ tend not to open up.

    It takes a lot of trust for him, an ENFJ, to open up to me, doesn't it? He wasn't defensive about his behaviour and seemed remorseful and apologised to me "sorry for hurting you."

  2. #2
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    Nobody's answering this post.

    I guess it's hard for ENFJs to open up about how they open up? ;-P :-)

  3. #3
    Senior Member copperfish17's Avatar
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    Eh, I think it's more likely that what you were asking for was unclear in the OP.

    It takes a lot of trust for him, an ENFJ, to open up to me, doesn't it?

    That was the only question you put down. And the obvious answer for the majority of people (ENFJ or not) is yes.

    I have ENFJ friends and do have a word or two to say about this - unfortunately I'm bust ATM so I'll come back to this later.
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  4. #4
    Senior Member fripping's Avatar
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    when do they stop opening up, more like.

  5. #5
    Lungs & Lips Locked Unkindloving's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by fripping View Post
    when do they stop opening up, more like.
    lol You're either way on the ins with one, or you're being bombarded by the landmines we put out there before we get to the good stuff.

    I'm not sure if others do the landmine tactic, but it's a way of gauging how others handle things that aren't really in our core, but are still burly.
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  6. #6
    Senior Member sciski's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by DoggyGirl View Post
    I(i discovered him asking other girls out. it's an addiction.)
    Good on you for confronting him. Good on him for being remorseful.

    Is he getting help for it?

    Sure, him opening up to you may be a sign that he's letting you in and is quite serious about you, but I would take not asking other women out while he is with you as a surer sign of commitment. (Apologies if you're in an open relationship or are okay with it as my comment then has no relevance.)

  7. #7
    Senior Member Sparrow's Avatar
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    I have only told my deepest darkest secret to one person so far (my current boyfriend), took me 3 years to ever say anything about it, we have been together for 5 years now .

    I can be open about a lot of things, with the exception of really super personal things, I won't open up to just anyone. I have to really feel like I can trust them and/or feel like said person is on the same wave length as me.

    With not so super personal things I tend to be too trusting and open! I don't like this. Sometimes after the fact (if I don't know the person well enough), I feel like my weaknesses have been exposed, and it could be used against me (it has happened before). I try to be a little more guarded now. Hope this helps!
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  8. #8
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    If you are the type that he can trust, so be it. It comes when it comes, while you make him see that you are eager to hear him out but will not pressure him.

    On another note, his asking other women out? That is a big red flag.
    I N V I C T U S

  9. #9
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    If you are the type that he can trust, so be it. It comes when it comes, while you make him see that you are eager to hear him out but will not pressure him.

    On another note, his asking other women out? That is a big red flag.
    I N V I C T U S

  10. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by sciski View Post
    Good on you for confronting him. Good on him for being remorseful.

    Is he getting help for it?
    yup. he's getting help.

    And thanks. I would wait till he is ready to be monogamous before i commit my heart to him.

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