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  1. #1
    Senior Member Santosha's Avatar
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    Default THe "Crazy" "Paranoid" NF

    Do you ever find it difficult to prove your intuition?

    This has been a life long struggle for me, literally since childhood. And the strangest thing? I've found more sensor feelers that consider my hunches plausible than intuitive thinkers. (Perhaps the feeling element?) .. While I do believe it's possible for us NF's to get paranoid from time to time.. (especially with depression or self-esteem issues) I don't believe that we are just all paranoid crackpots. Infact, I know we are not (atleast I'm not). The ability to read people through non-verbal communication.. the ability to read between the lines, and follow patterns into the future can make us fantastic predictors of human behavior. BUt try telling a strong ST or NT why you think your friends boyfriend is cheating, why you think a co-worker might be fired soon, why you can trust someone you've met twice, etc.. and they think your crazy! Or out there, or whatever. It's only after the truth comes out.. which can take years at times.. that they go "Gee, I guess you were right about that. How did you know?" Since I was very young I've been able to see the writing on the wall about certain people. Things that even my parents, with 25 yrs on me didn't pick up on!

    I remember as young kids there was a house down the street where this guy named Pat lived alone. He was probably 30. He would always have candy, kids toys, etc. at his house. The neighborhood kids LOVED going to play there. He always had this weird, fakey demeanor, like he was the nicest guy in the world, right? And the parents of the neighborhood didn't even mind there 5 and 6 yr olds going over to Pats. They'd even call him to babysit. I remember sitting in his living room and watching him bounce a kid on his knee, I was about 7 at the time. I could see from the kids expression that they didn't really like it, and they'd try to kinda push away, but he'd just grab them and keep doing it. I'd watch his eyes, his expressions, and the desperation I'd sense when the kids would go home. It was an instant flash.. he was all nice and sweet until a kid tried to push him away. And for a split second he'd drop his mask and I'd see that he was dangerously angry and frusterated. And I just knew he was a perve. So I told my mom.. and she pretty much disregarded it, though she never let me go to Pats again, which I didn't really care about at all. Years later, when I was about 20.. shit hit the fan and we found out he had molested like 15 kids in our neighborhood.

    The same thing happened with a 6th grade teacher in my school. Everyone thought he was the coolest teacher, as he'd play alot of games, and talk to kids on equal levels, follow young kid trends. Everyone wanted to be in his class. But I noticed this pattern with him, a constant focus on the really pretty little girls in class, he'd play favorites by this, and he'd get really grabby during recess and sports. When I was about 16 I found out he got fired for kissing kids.

    The thing that really sucks about intuition, is that sometimes you can't prove it. Like I couldn't prove that my good friends new girlfriend was going to cheat on him. But I knew it. I knew it because everytime we threw a party, she'd have two beers and fall all over the place claiming to be "so drunk" and just feed off the attention she'd get from other guys. I'd find her being overly flirtatious with our guy friends. She'd play up the incapeable girl act and try to get guys to come over to her place all the time to fix or help with various things, instead of asking her boyfriend or trying to do it herself. I'd try to get her to come do girl stuff, and she never had any interest in it. I'd try to subtley point these things out to him.. but his judgment was so clouded with fantastic sex. Sure enough, she ended up cheating on him with 2 other so called friends. Broke his heart.

    I wonder how you other NF's handle things like this. Situations where you can just tell someone is off, but trying to convince others just makes you look paranoid, crazy, or even jealous. Do you usually air your feelings on the matter? Or just stay out of it until the shit goes down?
    Man suffers only because he takes seriously what the gods made for fun - Watts

  2. #2
    The High Priestess Amargith's Avatar
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    I've gotten to the point where I try to just smile, shrug and move on. If people don't wanna believe me, who am I to make them believe me? All i can do is give them my opinion when they ask for it and answer their questions as good as I can. After that, they're on their own, especially if what I have to say doesn't resonate with them. I used to get pissy and frustrated (and sometimes I still do when I get triggered on my pet peeves), and wanna communicate even more to convince them, but I've come to the realisation that usually that makes you look even more like a 'crackpot' coz you get passionate/'craaaazyyyy' about defending something that they don't see. If they're in your life a lot and they respect you, they'll either give you the benefit of the doubt, or they'll realize with time that you're not that crazy as what you said seems to make sense once they deal with the situation they asked you stuff on in the first place. The thing is, if you go 'crazy' on them and hammering that you're seeing something they don't, they're unlikely to wanna acknowledge that or face that later on, even if you're correct, so...no point. Sometimes I feel like Cassandra, for that reason.

    Eventually it's a dog pointing at a rainbow and trying to convince the rest of his pack that it *really* is there (note: dogs are colourblind). So it's kinda understandable that they look at you like you're nuts, I guess.
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  3. #3
    Senor Membrane
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    I usually don't tell people my intuitions directly. They will eventually come to talk to me about their problems, and I can direct the discussion to what I've "known" to be wrong. This way they will find the evidence they need to see, and then they make up their minds to either direction. I've found it hard to convince anyone of anything they are not willing to see, so I don't beat myself up for not forcing them to see it.

  4. #4
    Post Human Post Qlip's Avatar
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    The worst part is for a long time I was convinced by others that my hunches and realizations were incorrect, when they were in fact on the money and were just being denied. It makes me angry all of the years I've lived thinking that I was paranoid, or that I was imagining things when the fact of the matter was that I was right. Now I feel confident enough to not bother checking, I just assume I'm right until proven otherwise.

  5. #5
    The High Priestess Amargith's Avatar
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    ^i hear ya on that as well
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  6. #6
    this is my winter song EJCC's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Qlippoth View Post
    The worst part is for a long time I was convinced by others that my hunches and realizations were incorrect, when they were in fact on the money and were just being denied. It makes me angry all of the years I've lived thinking that I was paranoid, or that I was imagining things when the fact of the matter was that I was right. Now I feel confident enough to not bother checking, I just assume I'm right until proven otherwise.
    Way to embrace your Te!

    This thread is so intriguing. I thought the hard-to-explain intuition thing was related to Ni, not Ne. And yet all these INFPs are posting here about how they relate. Do you guys think it's Fi/Ne, or something? Sensing patterns with Ne and drawing a conclusion with Fi? But that doesn't explain the difficulty verbalizing how you came to the conclusion...
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  7. #7
    The High Priestess Amargith's Avatar
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    Fi is hard to explain...especially to Ti-users ime.
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  8. #8
    Senor Membrane
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    Quote Originally Posted by EJCC View Post
    Do you guys think it's Fi/Ne, or something? Sensing patterns with Ne and drawing a conclusion with Fi? But that doesn't explain the difficulty verbalizing how you came to the conclusion...
    It is much like a hunch. In most cases there is no evidence, in some cases I can rationalize it but I am well aware that most of the clues for this rationalization could have been interpreted differently. A common example of my intuition is that I sense that there is something wrong with a person. I think this is because their body language is not in sync with their verbal message, or that their body language is giving mixed signals all the time in a way I can't interpret. I'll watch out when in presence of such a person.

  9. #9
    Senior Member Santosha's Avatar
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    For me its not the difficulty in verbalizing my intuition, I can lay out how this with this and that have all linked up to make X the likely, its just like Nolla mentions.. these clues seem to lead some to think.. "okay. It is what it is." and others to say "No.. this is what it really means." I do think that NF's are good in understanding the meaning behind the act. Even the tiniest, most subtle tone or expression. Since I believe Qlippoth is ENFP.. I'm not sure if this is Fi/Ne or Ne/Fi.
    Man suffers only because he takes seriously what the gods made for fun - Watts

  10. #10
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    It's interesting that you've had a similar experience to me with Sensing Feelers. I think that's why I keep dating Sensing Feeling men, because the kind of "intuition" you're speaking of is not MBTI "Intuition" it's actually something else, I believe for whatever reason it's more prominent in feelers. ESFJs are excellent at reading facial expressions and body language, and blah blah blah.

    So you're mixing the two things up, IMO.

    MBTI Intuition is more like preferring theory, making up theories (like ISFJ said the other night "every single thing does not have deeper meaning !!!111") or possibly having strange beliefs or ideations because of your imagination.

    I think one way my Ne, specifically, seems "crazy" is that I piece things together and sometimes come up with wild creative explanations for why something happened if I don't have all the details. It's like I'm making up a story for why or how something happened. I call it my "jumping to conclusions mat."


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