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Thread: Is it more or less difficult to be a feeler

  1. #31
    Paragon Gone Wrong Array OrangeAppled's Avatar
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    Mar 2009
    4w5 sp/sx
    IEI Ni


    Quote Originally Posted by Lark View Post
    No, neither do I, I'm interested because I'm TJ though and wonder about some people I know who are F, the ones who are more introverted seem to have more difficulty but with the few people who they're close to they are great as both a source of support and need it reciprocated quite a bit too.
    That's true to a point for myself...the fact that I would like support in return seems less obvious than with non IFPs I observe. IFPs seem most likely to say that they don't get the same support they give; but it's because we don't ask for it.

    Possibly, IFPs are the worst of the Feelers when it comes to communicating feelings, emotional needs, etc. IFJs have the advantage of Fe, which prompts interaction to process feeling, and EFPs are extroverts. Just based on how silent my ISFP (not particularly healthy) step-dad is about how he feels about anything, you'd think he was a T. He's obviously not a T, but he's still not expressive with feelings, sometimes appearing as if he has none. I don't doubt he likely feels he doesn't get the support he likes, but he doesn't appear like he wants any. I see myself in that; I know I'm the same way (but not as extreme), and I try & stay conscious of that tendency in my current relationship, because it's not constructive. So for IFPs, it can be hard to be Feelers because we appear unaffected at times & are treated as such.

    Being very expressive with Feeling no doubt has it's disadvantages though. I read a thread here once where ExFJs noted how much they feel they have to hold back, so as not to overwhelm people. They feel they have to restrain their feeling more than they'd naturally be inclined to, and I have to pry mine out with a cro-bar. In American culture, expressiveness is more often valued than not (especially from women), so IMO, they still seem able to function better here than the average IFP.
    "Charlotte sometimes dreams a wall around herself. But it's always with love - So much love it looks like everything else. Charlotte Sometimes - So far away, glass sealed and pretty." - The Cure

    INFP | 4w5 sp/sx - 451| RLUEI - Primary Inquisitive

  2. #32


    When i do have strong feelings I tend to suffer from GERD (Ginormous emotional reflux disorder) and thus vomit unsightly spew. I think this is partially due to being extroverted, thus I can appreciate the benefits introversion might offer in a containment effort. However mostly I would just prefer to be a TJ to be honest. Alas, I can dream.

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