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  1. #11
    4x9 cascadeco's Avatar
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    I went to college at 18, and from then until age 22 only lived home over the summers (except for my first summer away when I didn't WANT to go home so opted for summer school instead - to the disappointment of my mother). Post-college I was then back at home for about 9 months while age 22-23ish, just due to being unemployed and trying to figure out what my next step was.

    From age 23 on I've been totally on my own, though -- either with a roommate or living by myself -- and my desire to be on my own, especially early on, dictated my career path, as I turned away from what may have lined up with my interests more, only because to follow that path would have meant I would have needed to live at home for several years because I wouldn't have been earning enough money to survive & pay bills on my own.

    In the end I don't regret anything - but like I said, my desire for independence DID dictate the path I went down.
    "...On and on and on and on he strode, far out over the sands, singing wildly to the sea, crying to greet the advent of the life that had cried to him." - James Joyce

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  2. #12
    Senior Member Eluded_One's Avatar
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    I moved out in the late 20's. As an INFP, one of the most difficult [and important] things is to take action before "deadlines" are up. If you believe it's time to let loose, then let loose. If there are no regrets that may come from your choices, then the only other option is to live.

    Among other things, you should opt to move out here in Brooklyn. There's less pollution and housing isn't that costly compared to the other boroughs.
    “If you worry about what might be, and wonder what might have been, you will ignore what is.” -anonymous

  3. #13
    Emperor/Dictator kyuuei's Avatar
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    Being that I skip around a lot via the army, I've found it practical to stay with my parents. I did try to move out at one point in time, but I found it too much of hassle. When I attempted to do so again, my parents fell ill and I felt it best to stay here.

    I have a good relationship with my parents and sisters, so the need to move out is more selfish and less necessary. I loved living on my own.. I truly did. I also found it helped out my relationship a lot of with my parents, petty things never needed to be argued about anymore. I recommend it when you're stable enough to do so. Living paycheck to paycheck is one of the most stressful things ever.. so make sure you can afford to live on your own without relying on EVERY SINGLE DOLLAR you make. Whatever stress you THINK you have in your parent's house, it normally isn't as stressful as that mess.
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  4. #14
    Senior Member prplchknz's Avatar
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    19 but recent events had me move back in with family to deal with issues, luckily it's only short term.
    In no likes experiment.

    that is all

    i dunno what else to say so

  5. #15
    libtard SJW chickpea's Avatar
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    19, my mom tried to control every aspect of my life and i had to depend on her for rides which was not fun at all. plus i hate her husband more than anyone on this planet and he's verbally abusive and never leaves the house. actually never leaves the living room couch.

    i'm terrified of running out of money and having to go back (it's only been like 8 months)

  6. #16
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    I moved out of my grandparents house for three months when I was eighteen, moved closer to the beach with one of my best friends, moved back in after I totalled my car, moved back out again before I turned 19. Within four or five months, I think. My grandfather's ESTJ wife is probably clinically insane, I don't know, she sees a psychiatrist now, but unfortunately for me it was AFTER I grew up and moved out. The woman is one of the most controlling hateful bitches, omgz. My grandfather wanted me to live with him and go to college, but he refused to pay for my schooling unless I continued to live in his house. There was absolutely no way I could continue to tolerate the psychological and emotional abuse from his ESTJ wife, though, I would have done just about anything to get away from her. He was kind of controlling too, but it was more like in that "I'm your ISTJ father figure who loves you and wants to protect you" Guardian type stuff, where as with the ESTJ I sometimes felt like she sincerely hated me.

    Then I was on my own until I was ...25? 26? When I lived with my mom (not my grandparents, different households) for about a year and a half.

    I would live with my mom again if I had to, but I would prefer not to.

  7. #17
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sparrow View Post
    I moved out when I was 19...roommates can be just as annoying TRUST!
    Depends on how bad their relationship is.

    If her mother is merely annoying, then sure, yeah, roommates can be just as bad. On the other hand if her parents are very controlling, or she's being verbally abused in any way, then no way...no roommate is as bad as that, because at least you have your freedom.

    Or maybe I just think like an ENFP. I need freedom, I cannot be controlled, I will put up with tremendous bullshit just so I won't be controlled.

  8. #18
    Senior Member Rebe's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Marmie Dearest View Post
    Depends on how bad their relationship is.

    If her mother is merely annoying, then sure, yeah, roommates can be just as bad. On the other hand if her parents are very controlling, or she's being verbally abused in any way, then no way...no roommate is as bad as that, because at least you have your freedom.

    Or maybe I just think like an ENFP. I need freedom, I cannot be controlled, I will put up with tremendous bullshit just so I won't be controlled.
    Exactly. Thanks Marmie. This isn't me throwing a hissy fit over 'annoying parents' who tell me to do the dishes. This is my mom taking out all of her anger and stress at me and then, acting like an angel the next day.

    I am contemplating what I'd do for my independence and freedom. I have always been extremely independent in regards to how I want my life to be and what I want so I have never went to my parents for any sort of advice or guidance. The only area of independence I struggle with is financial but not badly enough that I can't do it. It will just be hard.

    I spoke to my ESFJ friend and basically, the bottom line is, I need to choose either moving out or college is more important to me because I can't accomplish both supremely well, only one or the other. I am already behind in my studies so I want to finish that as soon as possible, but at the same time I want to enjoy my life during the process.

  9. #19
    Lay the coin on my tongue SilkRoad's Avatar
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    I had just turned 23 when I moved out. (I lived at home when I went to uni, and the first couple of years I was working after uni.) I was one of very few 23 year olds (or around that age) who I knew who still lived with their parents. However, when most of them had moved out at 18 or 20, they moved across town or maybe to the next province. I moved from Canada to Ireland. That was my first time living away from home. I lived in Ireland for three years and have now lived in the UK for six.

    I have a good relationship with my parents but couldn't imagine living with them again. I am too used to my own life and my own ways of doing things by now. When I go home for a visit I love being there with them, but after a few days the things that annoyed me start to mount up on me again.

    If necessary, or if I moved back to Canada, I guess I could live with them for a few months. But really not more. And I say that though I love them a lot and get along well with them. You just change a lot when you move away.
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  10. #20
    insert random title here Randomnity's Avatar
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    It sounds like you're asking for guidance on how to know when it's right to move out, rather than just data points.

    For me I moved out the summer after 3rd year so I would have been 20, almost 21. It wasn't a big adjustment really since from 17 I'd been buying and cooking all my food and didn't really have rules or much family interaction. I mostly moved out for practical reasons - my dad is a Hoarder and I couldn't take it so I moved out as soon as I was financially able (as in from working, not my student loans, since I didn't want to endanger my future). Looking back I'm happy with my timing. I couldn't really have done it earlier and I was much happier afterwards which outweighed the increased financial cost (which for me was very low due to ridiculously low rent and because I was already buying my own food)

    So for me it was a question of 1) was I actually capable of supporting myself completely in any feasible situation, with a part-time job, and forever since I never ever wanted to come crawling back (i.e. is it possible) and 2) how intolerable was it to live at home (ie. is it worth the extra money).

    For you it sounds like the second question is the big one. That's really something that only you can answer, since it depends largely on how much you value independence vs. financial stability, and whether/how much you're willing to sacrifice now for a much more financially stable future.

    I would recommend doing a very careful budget before you decide, not afterwards, thinking of possibilities like losing your job or getting sick, and tracking what you spend now because if you haven't before, I guarantee you'll be surprised at how much money slips through the cracks on things you don't think about.
    -end of thread-

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