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  1. #241
    Senior Member animenagai's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by MBTI Enthusiast View Post
    Wow I just read the entire thread and it has proven to be very enlightening! I have just become acutely interested in you ENFPs after falling under the spell of one recently.

    So I get it, it is common for people to become quickly infatuated with ENFPs, sometimes when the romantic interest is not necessarily returned. So my question is: Have any of you ENFPs become infatuated with another only to realize that it would not work out? And if so, would the ENFP immediately break off the "relationship" upon realizing this, or let it go on in fear of hurting the other person, or withdraw in hopes that the other person will slowly disengage from the relationship?
    Put it this way, this is the story of my life: I fall head over heels for someone, or at least the idea of someone, what I think someone is and fall completely flat. I just don't know how to handle this, I'm too indulged in my fantasies for my own good. All the while, someone I see just as a friend may fall for me and because I'm a) so infatuated with my own target and b) never even opened myself to the possibility of a romantic relationship with the other person, that I end up with nothing. It is a very sad state of affairs, so I actually find it surprising when people say they find ENFP's (at least those like myself) attractive. I know I'm a guy and it doesn't really fit into the social norm for me to say this, but I kinda hope any girl that finds me attractive can just smack me over the head and make things blunt. I actually find that kinda cute, and it's what I need.

    ps. One of the girls I fell for was an ISTJ. Let's just say my idea of her wasn't anywhere close to being accurate.
    Chimera of Filth

    A gruesome beast with dripping flesh
    Clings to me as a sick fixture
    My throbbing heart it gnawed apart
    It stalks and hunts me through mirrors

  2. #242
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    Mmmm... I'm the same, I'm also a guy who would like girls that like me to smack me across the head and tell me about it.

    As for that air of infatuation, I think it's our sensitivity that get's to people. As a teenager in this reclusive world, intimacy, especially over the phone or face to face seems to be growing rarer. Personally, I've had situations where I'd called a friend up to talk for hours at night and we head into sensitive issues or discussions and the other person is at ease. This almost always grows into some rapid infatuation on the other person's behalf, thinking that the phone call meant that we were built for each other.

    Anyway, that was a bit of a tangent so I was wondering - Do you think that our stereotypical habit of diving too deep too fast makes people grow onto us?

    Another Situation I've also encountered is excessively short relationships. Does anyone else feel as if their relationships are shorter than most other's in the same demographic (but different personality).

  3. #243
    Senior Member Moiety's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by animenagai View Post
    Put it this way, this is the story of my life: I fall head over heels for someone, or at least the idea of someone, what I think someone is and fall completely flat. I just don't know how to handle this, I'm too indulged in my fantasies for my own good. All the while, someone I see just as a friend may fall for me and because I'm a) so infatuated with my own target and b) never even opened myself to the possibility of a romantic relationship with the other person, that I end up with nothing. It is a very sad state of affairs, so I actually find it surprising when people say they find ENFP's (at least those like myself) attractive. I know I'm a guy and it doesn't really fit into the social norm for me to say this, but I kinda hope any girl that finds me attractive can just smack me over the head and make things blunt. I actually find that kinda cute, and it's what I need.

    ps. One of the girls I fell for was an ISTJ. Let's just say my idea of her wasn't anywhere close to being accurate.
    I think most ENFPs would do well to rationalize a little bit their relationships to put a stop to idealization. At the end of the day, if something is good, it's also logically good. It's no coincidence that ENFPs tend to be 7s and 7s integrate to 5. Some logic is needed to balance out the excitement.

  4. #244
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    As an ENFP, people usually do not fall in love with me off the bat. They either want to have sex with me, or they tell me things like "Wow you can really put a guy off." So I am going to vote myth.

  5. #245
    Senior Member Nara's Avatar
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    Hahaha true that the crazyness and eccentrism can be a turn off... !
    But there's not a myth that we are real traps for introverts, specially introverted thinkers... but yes it's obsession more than true love, of course.

    I've always thought we use to create a special connection very quickly because we generally love to share deep thoughts and feelings with people. In fact we love having meaningful interactions with others, not only special ones.
    We also usually have a wide range of interest because of the Ne thirst of new experiences so we can talk about basically lots of topics and share some "incredible" common points with very different people.
    Here comes the misunderstood: for an introvert, it's like an obvious signal of interest from us, while for us it's just... a basic need.


    You HAVE to see the Woody Allen's movie To Rome With Love to understand how it works. The character played by Ellen Page is the perfect example of the Enfp's sorcery hahaha... ! (so realistic, it isn't even funny :/)

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