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[Fi] What is Fi like for you?

sculpting

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Hello! I always feel like when I start threads I should write them like a letter....anyways...


Can you guys describe what using Fi to explore and understand other people feels like? It is very odd and subtle to me, but the more I watch it the more I become aware of how it works and all the weird little info it feeds me all the time. But I explained it to an INTJ on another forum and he said it was "imaginary". Subjective, true, but not imaginary! :)

So I was curious as to how other people feel/experience/understand Fi to give them information. I would love more descriptions of the NFPs and feeling tones. I also have noticed a ton of INTPs and INFJs (too many to just be a fluke or misunderstanding of jungian functions) who note they feel Fi at at times and I would love to hear what that is like for them as well or any other type.

:hug:

Kindest Seriously Cheers Regards with Best Wishes,

Orobas
 

gromit

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Fi makes me just want to experience the person as they are.
 

rav3n

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To properly describe what Fi means to me, I have to translate the acronym:

F = Fucking
i = irritating

The translation speaks for itself.
 

Santosha

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Stolen from someone else.. but I loved this comparison of Fi/Fe, so I'm including this.

"Fe is the lava that boils out.
Fi is the fire inside that started it all.

Fe sings.
Fi composes.

Fe asserts itself.
Fi just IS.

Fe is the bird.
Fi is the song.

Fe is contagious.
Fi is seductive.

Fe feels for others.
Fi feels for self.

Fe resounds.
Fi resonates.

Fe is the smile that leads to the kiss.
Fi is the butterfly in your chest that led to the smile.

Fe makes decisions based on values.
Fi makes decisions based on PERSONAL values.

Fe reaches out.
Fi pulls in. "
 

kyuuei

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It is what keeps my head on straight. Fi and Te both help me create decisions about circumstances that arise.
 

skylights

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(with caveat that my Fi is probably much more externally affected than Fi doms')

resonation is a good word for it. i understand why some people use the word "tone". it's a whole body visceral sense of "knowing", more than an emotion. because there are some feelings that can't adequately be described in emotional terms. some are essentially emotionless, even though they do take emotion into account as information.

the way i think of Fi, is like an ocean inside of me, that reacts to atmospheres. i can create my own storms, i suppose the best metaphor would be an underwater earthquake (something in my core disturbing the waters) but it can also react to external wind, hurricane, etc. when i'm with another person, their "atmosphere" reads on my surface. Fi does pull in. it's self-referential. and that's fine as long as you're aware of it. to some extent the only reference point each of us has is ourself - to some extent it's presumptuous to think we could ever really understand things from another's point of view, or from a purely objective point of view. Fi is the aspect of our cognition that acknowledges that we are bound to our subjective viewpoints, and tries to use that, instead of escaping it. that can either lead to self-centeredness or self-awareness and wisdom.

importantly, i think it's not true that Fi always relates to my self. it relates to a self. for more mature people, this can result in deep intrapersonal understanding of others. the problem is that when Fi is immature, it can stir up the water so much that we cannot see beyond ourselves. learning to calm our own seas so that we can get a clearer read on others is extremely important for our growth.

as for picking up on others' feelings, it's a lot of elements in combination. it's the way they hold their body, their tone of voice, the way they move, the way they look at things, the way they interact, all the nuances of their expressions that speak to their overall feeling. so i can shift myself to meet them, which i think helps them feel more comfortable around me. because i am trying to understand them on their level. and then they will share more information about themselves, and i can either shift to meet them more, or i can try to help change their emotional state if they've expressed that whatever they're feeling is unpleasant (i try to not influence emotions if people don't want it). or i can use it for bad... to see others' weaknesses and exploit those.

Jenaphor said:
F = Fucking
i = irritating

that's not entirely untrue :laugh:

self-centered FPs can be some of the most annoying people ever.

to ourselves as well as to everyone else. :doh:
 
Last edited:

nolla

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I agree with pretty much anything that skylights says. :yes: But yeah, resonation is the word.

importantly, i think it's not true that Fi always relates to my self. it relates to a self. for more mature people, this can result in deep intrapersonal understanding of others. the problem is that when Fi is immature, it can stir up the water so much that we cannot see beyond ourselves. learning to calm our own seas so that we can get a clearer read on others is extremely important for our growth.

Yeah, it is important to see that even if a person gets rid of their ego, there will still be Fi, and it isn't just laying around doing nothing. I think that Ne and Fi are working pretty tightly together when dealing with people. Ne looks for cues and sees how they relate to Fi. So, the more you know yourself the more you know about others. This is true in reverse too.

For me Fi is the rock heart of a jelly planet.
 

Thalassa

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Fi causes me to put myself in other people's shoes and think about how I would feel in that situation or how I would feel if someone I cared about was in that situation, sometimes it's not even a thought process, like I'll immediately just feel emotional pain seeing someone hurt an animal, or to look at a starving or beaten child, or to think about living through a natural disaster, or under a repressive violent regime...

It makes me want to value other cultures for what they are, and defend other people's right to be themselves, as long as it doesn't violate what I see as Universal Human Ethical Truths.

Because the universal human ethical truths are part of the Fi as well....certain things are just wrong, they just are, don't try to tell me it's subjective that owning human slaves or selling ones pre-pubescent children into prostitution is "just part of another culture." I love and admire and respect other cultures and try to see the world through their eyes....but there are violations to Universal Human Ethical Truths (that my Fi has determined) that I will not tolerate under any circumstance.

Also, it makes me really emo sometimes and very sensitive to the vibe and aesthetic of my external environment and/or how other people treat me.
 

freeeekyyy

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When I relate to individuals, I use Fi. Where Te causes me to put everyone and everything into some sort of system, Fi comes in and says, "but that isn't true here." It gives me a desire to understand those around me. If I understand a person's reasoning for doing something, I have a very hard time judging them, even if I know what they've done is wrong. I'm not sure whether to count it as a blessing or a curse. Perhaps my perception of it is skewed by Ni though, I'm not sure. It may be different for an STJ or NFP.
 

Thalassa

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Yes! If I understand a person's reasoning I am more likely to be sympathetic. Like I was saying that Certain Things Are Universally Wrong, but with most things in life I judge on a case-by-case basis according to context and circumstance, etc.

Even like when people sell their children into sex slavery, even though that shit has to be fucking stopped, if they're starving to death and don't know any better, it's not like I'm going to judge them in some moral way - like who am I to judge someone in that predicament.

On the other hand, I'm more likely to strongly strongly judge someone who steals or exploits other people if that person is wealthy and powerful and had no excuse such as basic survival/obtaining food or shelter to do those kinds of immoral things. Then I start to use Te to construct the most efficient systematic way of keeping those kinds of people in check, by law.

But that's affected by my Fi, too, obviously. Some people who don't share my Fi values would say those people shouldn't be legally handled - because they make the logical error of not understanding that corporations and companies can rule by authoritarian brainwashing and corruption just as easily as a government can, and they're either idiots or can't see the big picture to not be able to grasp that parallel concept...so maybe that *is* strong usage of Ne/Te BUT...(I digress) My Te usually can't stand alone, it's always colored with my Fi ethics, though I attempt to be objective in certain areas.
 

wolfy

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Fi is the thing Jung and others wrote about. That is what Fi is to me. It could also be the reason for the following two sentences. You never know...
 

animenagai

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I think the LL explained Fi in the best way when she explained her journey in becoming/developing/whatever into an ENFP. It starts with internal awareness. It is completely foreign to me how someone could deny having feelings. Completely. I would compare my emotional reactions to sensory reactions. It is that simple, that direct. When something of worth happens, my emotions give me a response straight away, much like how my eyes would see flashing lights immediately. Fi starts with being very aware of these internal, immediate reactions. I know exactly how I feel, much like I know exactly how hungry I am or how much pain I am in.

Once you've identified your own feelings, it comes completely obvious that other people have the same emotions. I don't think of emotions as some crazy spectrum that is completely subjective, I think the amount of different emotions one can have are limited, and every human being has access to them. One I see someone being upset, angry, happy etc. I hence resonate with them very easily. It's not something foreign that's taken over them, it's the same old things I go through from time to time. This could manifest itself in very complicated ways. For example, a good friend of mine could be joking around amongst a group of people, but I would be able to tell if he was faking it. I know the guy, I subconsciously know exactly how someone could put on a mask in a social situation. Through this resonance of emotions I can judge what he is really feeling.

Hope that was helpful.
 

OrangeAppled

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I see my Introvert Feeling thought process as primarily focused on concepts of the ideal. So yeah, it is "imaginary", but not in the way I suspect that INTJ meant :cheese: . I associate Fi-dom thinking more with existential thought than being people-oriented. I spend little time thinking directly about people, at least in realistic terms. I think about people more in general terms. When someone I know does pop into my head, it's to play some role in a daydream, which often turns out to be my mind working out some concept of what would be good (or very, very bad). The reactions I have to these thoughts or daydreams are often stronger than real life interactions; which is how I think Fi produces Feelings that grow intensively, as opposed to extensively as Fe feelings do (to paraphrase Jung). Maybe that's nuts, but posts on INFP boards assure me it's quite common for a Fi-dom. :tongue:

It's interesting how some do have a very saccharine view of Fi, or see it as maudlin, nonsensical thinking. Their own Feeling, particularly their Fi, is that way.

I think this quote sums it up:

Lenore Thompson said:
The situation [of Fi being seen as irrational] is complicated by the fact that only 6% of Americans use Introverted Feeling as their primary approach to life. This means that a great many types associate this function largely with its bottom-rung potential for impressionism and sentimentality.

When it comes to other people, I feel like I'm approaching them iNtuitively most of the time. I'm not making evaluations of any kind. I take a wait & see attitude, I make connections, I consider possibilities. I can be quite detached when discussing someone else's emotions. It doesn't affect my own, but it does set my brain running to consider what it means. I suppose around here is where a Fi train of thought kicks in. I start to compare my internal concepts to the context and see how they apply, and then I am able to relate, to offer comfort, and basically be touched by another person. When I was younger, I was hard to move emotionally; I actually think it is Ne development that has increased my empathetic side. I can see ways that my feelings relate to reality.

However, when I find myself empathizing, I do not consider how I would feel in a situation. Instead, I imagine myself as that person, and I imagine how they feel. It's kind of like simulating someone else in your head.

The supposed self-absorbed aspect of Fi is not really selfish. When you spend a lot of time examining your inner world & how you feel, it gives you a template for the internal realm of all people. I've used this metaphor recently, so not to sound like a broken record (too late!), but I think it makes the concept clear: the Fi-dom's fascination with self is like dissecting a frog. You dissect one frog, & now you have a general understanding of what those frogs are like inside. The better the understanding, the better you may be able to cure any physical ills of such a frog. Fi works like that; I know what it is to be human, to need, to feel, to experience emotion in the most nuanced ways, and I have vivid imagination, and all of this helps me grasp how other people feel, and how to help them feel better. I dissect myself to understand the inner workings of all people. Jung basically says the great similarity of people internally is what allows Fi feelings to be communicated at all, as generally they are quite difficult to articulate in ways others will grasp or accept as valid, but the big exception is when they hit on points nearly all humans relate to on some base level.

I've also said many times that I see Fi as creating models of the ideal (via fantasy) much as Ti creates frameworks of logic. What this does is allow you to identify core principles of what is significant/necessary/good/perfect/etc, especially in relation to being human. This doesn't mean a Fi-dom has set rules for what is good; that is waaaaaaay too specific. We're talking basic ideas, ideas that can very much be applied to suit an individual & molded to fit a context; the Fi-dom reasons on the core needs behind everyone's preference, where they all cross at some point.

To briefly touch on the difference in Fi in ENFPs & INFPs, I like this comment from Lenore Thompson, as I see Fi-aux types as more obviously "people-oriented" and Fi-doms as more "thought/idea-oriented", even though function order might imply the opposite to some.

Lenore Thompson said:
It's instructive to compare these types (INFPs) to ENFPs, who share the same two functions but understand life very differently. ENFPs rely on iNtuition to gauge the nature of the external context and Feeling to recognize the value of the people in it.
INFPs approach reality from the other way around. Introverted Feeling prompts them to hold unconditional human value, and they use iNtuition to figure out what that means in terms of their existential context.
 

Southern Kross

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^ All these things. :yes:

I've been trying to think how I would accurately define it, but after reading yours OA, it came to me:

For me, Fi is an internal map of the human condition. It guides me to understand both myself and others and helps me to make sense of what I'm seeing; it directs me on which path to take when facing a fork in the road; it inspires me to explore the world of human nature; it shows me how great things could be; it allows me to imagine something I have never seen, to know what to expect from something I have never experienced, to feel something I have never felt; it gives me ways to combat the wild jungle of emotion, showing me a way through and around it - how to tackle and tame it. However it takes time to learn to read this map. As I grow older I get better at it: things become more familiar, I take less wrong turns and discover the shortcuts. I also learn to not to foolishly ignore what it tells me, nor to constrain myself to the defined paths it outlines.
 

xpersephonex

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Fi personalizes everything that surrounds me and decides what those things mean to me. It subjectively judges whether something is 'more' or 'less', just as Ti decides whether something is 'true' or 'false' despite popular opinion. I usually compartmentalize it, unless I feel threatened or stressed.
 

BAJ

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Right now, I'm sort of confused about the functions, and I've heard many convo about them on these forums, and I'm getting confused. I tried to do a little research, because although I test as INFP or INTP, I'm NOT very knowledgeable about what they functions are.

I was arguing (futile!) with a person on another forum who seems to suggest that Ti and Fi can't exist together, and I totally disagree. (Sorry, different topic!)

Fi, I'm looking for harmony and well-being. It's like the weather. It can be like a giant slug that attacks me with depression. Or I may just start laughing based on a convo I'm having in the future or some thought.

Is this right for me? Is this right for them?

Why can't we just feed, cloth, and provide medicine for everyone in the world? We could! We could! We don't because greed and the power structures that exist.

Why can't we just stop bombing out the children and making war? Ah, I'm not sure about this one, but I think a lot of war is because of the greed and power structures that exist. One side is evil and the other is good? Bah! NO, no, no...

It's like the Sisters of Charity founded by Mother Teresa. They go into Palestine. They are not doctors, but they just go help. They bandage the children. The bring water. In India, they pick the maggots out of the dying and give them rice. Who cares if someone ELSE says, "He what are you doing? Those are the untouchables!" BAh!

Ah, me, I have personified desires, like my own flock of starving children. Sorry, kids...I can't feed you today.

We are working on it. Things are getting better sometimes. I go crazy less. I used to do things like call in a quit my job without notice or get very depressed. Things are better now. Also, I've learned a lot about how to deal with different situations and people I encounter. "Oh, here comes a hurricane.", says Fi, zipping up his raincoat. Previous bad storms...well I thought I was going to die. Now it's just a matter of course.

"Yea, Captain, just trim the sails. It'll be alright."

When we speak of storms here, I'm talking about people and situations.

SDC10925.jpg
 

Esoteric Wench

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Can you guys describe what using Fi to explore and understand other people feels like? It is very odd and subtle to me, but the more I watch it the more I become aware of how it works and all the weird little info it feeds me all the time. But I explained it to an INTJ on another forum and he said it was "imaginary". Subjective, true, but not imaginary! :)

Hmmm.... Orobas, I think you pose an interesting question about Fi. I've spent a few minutes thinking about it. I've never really examined my process before. So here's my first run at an answer:

My Fi is alway looking for a deeper truth about people. Whatever they say, whatever they do is only a clue for understanding their essence. For example, I may be talking to someone and paying attention to what they do and say. But in the background I'm running a color commentary... or maybe it's more like I'm trying to solve a puzzle. The puzzle pieces are my observations about their behavior. But putting the puzzle together means that I figure out what makes that person tick. That I understand their motivations that make them do or say X, Y, and Z.

Fi is people focused. This may seem obvious, but I think it's important to point out that even in situations in which the conversation is about non-people things, I'm always thinking about the effect on people. For example, I might be talking about the 2008 economic crisis including credit swaps and other financial instruments. My Fi then takes this information and runs it against what I know about what makes people tick. I might comment on how bad US financial policy was in the interest of people working on Wall Street.

Orobas, can you explain your own observations about how your Fi takes in information?
 
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