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  1. #31
    Senior Member Eckhart's Avatar
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    I can relate a bit as well. Of course not in the same dimensions as you, I have a few posts more, but here are some people who write more posts in a month than I wrote in a year, and when you put it like that I am quite inactive. I browse this forum several times a day after all as well. Often enough I don't know what I would answer, and before I answer nonsense I better don't write at all usually (no, this was not an invitation to tell me that you guys find my posts nonsense still ). And so it becomes many people in this forum probably don't even know me or still confuse me with EcK.

    Many threads are also too quick for me, too many people dynamics which I don't look through at all, or too many long discussions between single persons while when I post my post usually that is the end for me on that thread because there does barely ever grow a discussion (or even a fight, lol) out of my posts. Apparently I just post too boring stuff

  2. #32
    Instigator, First Class LovelyAngel's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kriash View Post
    I often find myself on here for hours, reading various posts so I, in turn, can post afterwards. But I find myself unable to say anything that already hasn't been said, so usually it results in 15 pages read, and moving on to a new thread.
    I have been on this site for over a year now, maybe even longer than that, I don't exactly remember. But my post count is still under 50.

    I wonder, is this the case with many other people? Or am I alone in lurking and rarely posting? Does it have anything to do with type? I would figure not, but still, I wonder if there is anything to it.
    Possibly the aspect (of my lack of posting) that is type-related is that if I post, I want to add value to the thread, and I want my post to be articulate and well-thought out... and it takes quite a bit of time for me to write a decent comment (well... perfectionism does not help...). Given my hectic schedule, I simply can't afford the time to contribute to all the interesting threads. So I think I'm a perpetual lurker, delurking only on the infrequent occasions when I have a slight bit of spare time... and I think I can do a quick hit-and-run without getting sucked into a thread. Forums can be such time-sinks! Just lurking consumes too much time here (because everything is interesting)... and I have to limit forum scanning to the weekends.

    I'd hate to ramp up my post count by commenting a bare "I concur" to some of the wonderfully expressed posts and responses I've read (particularly from some of my INFJ peers). I'll simply continue to read and nod my head silently, I guess.

    (Hmm. This comment falls short of my high, perfectionist standards! )
    "There is always something to do. There are hungry people to feed, naked people to clothe, sick people to comfort and make well. And while I don't expect you to save the world I do think it's not asking too much for you to love those with whom you sleep, share the happiness of those whom you call friend, engage those among you who are visionary and remove from your life those who offer you depression, despair and disrespect."
    -- Nikki Giovanni

  3. #33
    the Dark Prophet of Kualu
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    Quote Originally Posted by thealchemist View Post
    This is kinda off-topic but whatever. :P

    My INFJ friend and I communicate in a series of words (often invented but they suit the description) and hand gestures and if we have paper and a pen, we'll scribble a little schematic to illustrate the idea. We both fail at drawing so usually, we give up and try to find suitable analogies/metaphors. Generally, however, we don't need to say much to illustrate an idea unless we really want to go into details. It's like we can read each other's minds.

    I find that when we are in a group and he's explaining something and someone doesn't understand, I am usually the one who has to do the translating. Or if he doesn't understand something, I am usually the one who has to interpret what others are saying for him.

    Is this common?
    It happens to me as well.
    To illustrate: Me and another INTP friend talk to each other with people close by, we expect everyone else to follow our train of thought and somewhere end up finishing to talk about the end of the universe without a soul nearby catching anything we say. She has me totally spoiled nowadays and I can't find a single suitable pair of eyes to do this with. It's fairly annoying.

    And I can't stay to chat. i probably would have nothing more to say anyway. Good talking with ya. I miss fun people in my life. Everyone has gotten married or gotten a kid or dumped me :')

    Blah blah blah, racks down into the thread with feely talk and emotional qualms. Anyway, I love talking like that.

  4. #34
    the Dark Prophet of Kualu
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    Default Random thoughts about communication

    Quote Originally Posted by LovelyAngel View Post
    Possibly the aspect (of my lack of posting) that is type-related is that if I post, I want to add value to the thread, and I want my post to be articulate and well-thought out... and it takes quite a bit of time for me to write a decent comment (well... perfectionism does not help...). Given my hectic schedule, I simply can't afford the time to contribute to all the interesting threads. So I think I'm a perpetual lurker, delurking only on the infrequent occasions when I have a slight bit of spare time... and I think I can do a quick hit-and-run without getting sucked into a thread. Forums can be such time-sinks! Just lurking consumes too much time here (because everything is interesting)... and I have to limit forum scanning to the weekends.

    I'd hate to ramp up my post count by commenting a bare "I concur" to some of the wonderfully expressed posts and responses I've read (particularly from some of my INFJ peers). I'll simply continue to read and nod my head silently, I guess.

    (Hmm. This comment falls short of my high, perfectionist standards! )
    I seriously have nothing else to say but: Some people might find even a line saying "I concur" to be a very valuable input. I've heard from people that once they hear that someone else has a similar experience, they open up easier and more thoroughly than before.

    Once, a girl tried to just let me say "I understand" and that was enough for her to feel welcome and in good company. So sometimes, the most valuable thing you can do, is to reply with a "thumbs up" so to speak.

    Sometimes, I don't understand that and other times I do but most of the time I get annoyed by those that go "yesyesyesyesyes" while I'm trying to speak without having gotten the whole idea yet. I perceive this as "not listening" but I can be wrong. I hope I am.
    Open for interpretation.
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    Fell for the temptation: Nohari / Johari

  5. #35
    Post-Humorously stalemate's Avatar
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    Even though I have quite a few posts, I am the same way. I probably post in less than 10% of the threads that I read.

  6. #36
    resonance entropie's Avatar
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    That means assuming you've posted in every thread twice you've read around 4,660 threads. Prove that !
    [URL]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tEBvftJUwDw&t=0s[/URL]

  7. #37
    Post-Humorously stalemate's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by entropie View Post
    That means assuming you've posted in every thread twice you've read around 4,660 threads. Prove that !
    Bad assumption.

  8. #38
    Senior Member Lightyear's Avatar
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    Guilty as charged. I don't even feel like posting in this thread since everything I want to say has probably already been said.

  9. #39
    Senior Member BAJ's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Gtzk View Post
    I seriously have nothing else to say but: Some people might find even a line saying "I concur" to be a very valuable input. I've heard from people that once they hear that someone else has a similar experience, they open up easier and more thoroughly than before.

    Once, a girl tried to just let me say "I understand" and that was enough for her to feel welcome and in good company. So sometimes, the most valuable thing you can do, is to reply with a "thumbs up" so to speak.

    Sometimes, I don't understand that and other times I do but most of the time I get annoyed by those that go "yesyesyesyesyes" while I'm trying to speak without having gotten the whole idea yet. I perceive this as "not listening" but I can be wrong. I hope I am.



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