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  1. #31
    Sugar Hiccup OrangeAppled's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by sleuthiness View Post
    estjs just AREN'T ALL THAT INTO AMPERSANDS, SRY INFPS who absolutely share more in common with us than infjs, particularly the organic, non-forum varieties.
    I'm not sure what point you're trying to make.....rephrase please.

    Quote Originally Posted by Elfboy View Post
    I'm gonna disagree with you on this point. to me, INFPs and INFJs don't look or act alike at all and their motivations are completely different
    Motivations, true, if you dig deep. However, surface motivations tend to be in the form of ideals for NFs, which can seem similar among all of the types (which is why Keirsey, who types based on surface qualities & behaviors, lumps NFs together). As for looking/acting, I think all INxx types can appear somewhat similar until you get close-up. I consistently get compared to all my other INxx family (including an INFJ aunt) and other INxx I know IRL. While I feel a kinship with ISFPs & ENFPs, we never get compared IRL because our demeanors & behaviors differ too much. There's an aloof, detached aspect stemming from being an introvert & an intuitive, even when you're a warm Feeler (which I am not - warm, that is). Online, you notice the distinctions much more between INxx types & the similarities between NFPs (and FPs in general) because you're seeing thoughts typed out, not demeanors.
    Often a star was waiting for you to notice it. A wave rolled toward you out of the distant past, or as you walked under an open window, a violin yielded itself to your hearing. All this was mission. But could you accomplish it? (Rilke)

    INFP | 4w5 sp/sx | RLUEI - Primary Inquisitive | Tritype is tripe

  2. #32
    Senior Member INTPness's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by skylights View Post
    maybeeee...

    and we love you, too!
    Yessssssssssssss!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    NTJ's are the only types that have ever made me feel emo.
    ENP's are the only types that have ever made me feel like a sensor.


    There are two great days in a person's life - the day we are born and the day we discover why. --William Barclay

  3. #33
    Certified Sausage Smoker Elfboy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by skylights View Post
    mm. we're close deep down inside, but our outward behaviors and often our surface motivations are different.

    i'm closest to INFPs personality-wise but tend to have better rapport IRL with ENFJs. i love INFJs online but i don't know how to interact with them IRL. they usually confuse me.

    sometimes Fe thinks Fi is irresponsible, and vice versa. it seems that our own side of the fence pays attention to "what really matters". except not really, both functions seek to achieve the same goal (love, harmony, security, etc) in the end. they just have different touchpoints.

    i am impressed by the ease at which Fe dom/aux know how to handle interpersonal situations, often. sometimes i get so wrapped up in how to take care of it perfectly and address each individual's needs and not hurt one or the other and not overstep boundaries and all that confusion... and an FJ just breezes in and handles things perfectly... it's like...



    yeah, we don't see the Fe needs as easily. the way we care for people is different. though to be honest, the emphasis you're putting on impersonal values here is odd. i mean, yes, i care about humanistic values, and extrapolate to a bigger picture, but i'm not that black-and-white in terms of right and wrong. INFPs are a little more solid ethically, though i would still assert that most NFPs see morality in terms of fine scales and subtle weightings, not simple Right and Wrong.

    the other thing is, sometimes i think that Fe doms will take care of things that i really don't need someone taking care of for me, but they're not there to support me when i need support. like, when i'm having a hard time emotionally, what i need is someone to sit with me and empathize and just be accepting. ime (experience with mom, several close friends), Fe doms really don't like doing this. they find it useless, superfluous. the other thing i notice with NFJs is that there's often a barrier of superiority when they're helping. there's a tangible feeling of "i am the helper, you are the helped", instead of a more equal "we are both hurt persons and it's my turn to help you now". which is not to say i don't love ENFJs. i have watched over and over again the ENFJs i know do incredibly selfless things. they'll devote themselves to mentoring someone, get up and out at 3 in the morning to help someone in distress, clear their schedule for the evening to make sure that someone's going to be all right. it's beautiful.

    and the way i care for people... i'll sit with them for hours and talk if that's what they need. make them presents, write them letters, help them figure out what to do next. i'll drive them across five states in the middle of the night, if that's what they need. i will do just about anything for someone i love. but it's especially when i'm passionately discussing something that i can't deal with others' needs... the problem is that Fi is attuned to inner emotions, and when my feelings are overwhelming, i can't pick up on others' very well. it's as if my internal radio were suddenly turned to loud screamo. it's awful, and i can't hear the sadness of your music because my own music is blaring. so if in an argument i seem very hurtful... it's because i'm hurting so much myself that i can't even deal with the other person right now. and often, in argument, the other person appears to be attacking me. it baffles me how my mother (ESFJ) or very close friend (ENFJ) sometimes think that i intend to hurt them when defending myself after they have accused me... i didn't chase them down and i'm defending myself... how does that even make sense... :confused:

    obviously, a growth area for me is to learn how to turn down the internal radio. it's hard, though, because Fi signals are amplified by Ne.

    anyway. for the record, i do regardless and am generally quite impressed by ENFJs.



    QFT, and seconded



    true, and true. whatever enneatype i am, i come off as Fe IRL, apparently. in the forums it's easier to see the difference. i think that's part of why i get along better in general IRL with FJs than with fellow NFPs.
    underlined: actually, I think it's more the opposite. our actions to non NFs often seem the same, but it seems to me that we are very different on the inside

    first bold: I really have to try to be sensitive to this. it's very easy for me to think NFJs are completely useless and chase after things that don't have any value whatsoever, but I'm sure I look the same way to them as they tend to be much more sociable creatures (my natural tendency is to view being social as weak, which is of course ridiculous lol)

    second bold: it's true, both the NFJs and SFJs I know have this problem.

    PS: I think you're a 2w3

  4. #34
    Certified Sausage Smoker Elfboy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by MonkeyGrass View Post
    I find myself understand NFPs easily, but not agreeing with them often. (Obviously, that could be said for some NFJs I know as well, but not as often). No one drives me straight up a tree faster than an ENFP, though. (no offense meant, I have some close ENFP friends!) More immature ENFPs tend to be the ones I can't stomach. Once they're on a feeling rampage, there's not a lot of logic involved in their impassioned conversation (or so it seems to me).

    I'm not sure where the differences lie exactly..I'd be interested to hear the thoughts of others.

    One major difference I've noted is that while I admire ENFPs' passion for causes, they tend to be a little more oblivious of the needs of their families or more boring responsibilities than NFJs. They have a wicked strong personal sense of right from wrong, but can be a little oblivious of the needs of their closest loved ones, even while passionately discussing something they feel strongly about. IOW, boundless compassion in some areas, but seemingly oblivious to other's pain in other areas.
    underlined: this is SO true
    bold: interesting, I haven't noticed this.

  5. #35
    Certified Sausage Smoker Elfboy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Viridian View Post
    Oh boy, here it goes... I hope this thread doesn't become another INFJ/ENFP spat.

    Firstly, Elfboy, given how you feel about the INFJs you've met, I think your list seems quite nonjudgemental. Good job, dude!

    Secondly, let's face it, you're no ordinary ENFP - most of them are Sevens, not Eights. Enneagram can have a pretty good influence on how people of those types function. INFPs who are Twos or Sixes can look INFJ-ish; vice-versa for INFJ Nines. Same deal with ENFP Twos or 7w6s and ENFJ Eights.

    Take me, for instance. If you look at my thread (decayed beyond belief), half of the posters think I'm an INFP and half think I'm an INFJ. There are some serious misconceptions going around about Fi/Fe, which is why threads like this quickly become a battlefield.

    Again, just my 2¢. I may elaborate a little later.
    true. enneagram plays a big role. ENFP 6s can seem like INFJs, ENFP 2s can seem like ENFJs, ENFP 8w7s can seem like ENTJs or ESTPs, ENFP 8w9s can seem like ENTJs or INTJs and ENFP 4s and 9s can seem like INFPs. this being said, I think NFs of all varieties are extremely dangerous when they go bad (especially because we're the ones that are least expected to)

  6. #36
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    Quote Originally Posted by Elfboy View Post
    true. enneagram plays a big role. ENFP 6s can seem like INFJs
    oooooh...maybe that's what it is...

    ENFP 2s can seem like ENFJs, ENFP 8w7s can seem like ENTJs or ESTPs, ENFP 8w9s can seem like ENTJs or INTJs and ENFP 4s and 9s can seem like INFPs. this being said, I think NFs of all varieties are extremely dangerous when they go bad (especially because we're the ones that are least expected to)
    This is actually a very good assessment of enneagram/type variants.

  7. #37
    Junior Member Ms. Tea's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Elfboy View Post
    the more I study cognitive function and read forum posts, I'm realizing that NFPs and NFJs are really much more different than they are similar for example:

    NFPs:
    personal values
    integrity
    justice/honor
    intrapersonal intelligence
    low neuroticism
    metaphors/analogies

    NFJs:
    group values
    harmony
    peace/mercy
    interpersonal intelligence
    high neuroticism
    symbols/epiphanies

    does anyone else feel the same way?
    I think your spot on here

  8. #38
    Yeah, I can fly. Aleksei's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Elfboy View Post
    the more I study cognitive function and read forum posts, I'm realizing that NFPs and NFJs are really much more different than they are similar for example:

    NFPs:
    personal values
    integrity
    justice/honor
    intrapersonal intelligence
    low neuroticism
    metaphors/analogies

    NFJs:
    group values
    harmony
    peace/mercy
    interpersonal intelligence
    high neuroticism
    symbols/epiphanies

    does anyone else feel the same way?
    It sounds about right; though I don't think there is an intrinsic set of values or behavior inherent to either Fi or Fe. The difference is, quite simply, that Fe types will look to role models for guidance, whereas Fi types rely on their own sense of right and wrong.
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

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  9. #39
    i love skylights's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Elfboy View Post
    underlined: actually, I think it's more the opposite. our actions to non NFs often seem the same, but it seems to me that we are very different on the inside
    well, that's kind of true too, when i mean inside i mean less "mind" than... core? like at the end of the day, NFP and NFJ wants and needs are pretty similar. big-picture meaning, connection, support, love.

    PS: I think you're a 2w3
    i appreciate your opinion! i don't think so, my mom's a 2 and i don't share the "need to be needed" thing, but thank you regardless!!

  10. #40
    Certified Sausage Smoker Elfboy's Avatar
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    does anyone else feel that NFPs resemble NTJs more than NFJs?

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