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  1. #11
    violaine
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    Quote Originally Posted by fidelia View Post
    Ni tends to be mistake avoidant I think. It tries to preview and predict outcomes and take the best possible route that it can see.
    I think so too. I wish I could switch the minesweeper part of my mind off sometimes. It leads to general unease that isn't alleviated even when I'm right about something sometime down the track. I know how alarmist it makes me sound too when I'm off in hunch land, a few steps removed from reality, (though it's often my reality). I think it's why INFJs can find it so difficult to just be, the course ahead seems to chart itself and won't be ignored.

  2. #12
    Senior Member KDude's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by violaine View Post
    I think so too. I wish I could switch the minesweeper part of my mind off sometimes. It leads to general unease that isn't alleviated even when I'm right about something sometime down the track. I know how alarmist it makes me sound too when I'm off in hunch land, a few steps removed from reality, (though it's often my reality). I think it's why INFJs can find it so difficult to just be, the course ahead seems to chart itself and won't be ignored.
    Yeah, I'm sure that I'm more in the moment. For better or worse, I'm curious. But I do forge my path in a way. Needless to say, Fi isn't always always reactive. It can be avoidant and judgemental before really getting anywhere where it had a chance to react. I'm not too extreme in this though, but Fi doms can be, I think. I'll take a cue from Thomson's book where she talks about Fi doms who haven't exercised Pe very well. Usually younger, hardcore introverts may be like this more often. Where they have very egocentric/stereotypical thinking and lots of convictions. They may avoid many mistakes indirectly because they aren't open much in general. Maybe new opportunities make them feel sullied or "selling out", so to speak (which I get from time to time, but not a lot).

  3. #13
    Analytical Dreamer Coriolis's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by fidelia View Post
    Ni tends to be mistake avoidant I think. It tries to preview and predict outcomes and take the best possible route that it can see.

    Fe usually also wants to weigh cost vs outcome. Therefore, I believe INFJs tend to want to avoid mistakes when possible and suck all the useful stuff out of them when they happen (and disseminate what they've learned to others).

    I wouldn't agree with the broad generalizations about each of the four types. I do think though that NTs would be more likely to experiment first hand for intellectual and investigative purposes, although if they had a particular reason to not want to pursue a course of action, they would have no qualms about standing out.
    INTJs do like to experiment, but a worthwhile experiment starts with an understanding of the problem or question, and a hypothesis, all informed by background research. Otherwise it is uncontrolled trial and error and will not likely yield results that can be generalized to future situations.

    NTs weighs cost vs. outcome as well, in the style of a cost-benefit analysis. As Violaine points out, declining an opportunity is a choice, too, and has its own associated cost. NTs may be mistake-avoidant, but I wouldn't say we are risk- avoidant. We just prefer to take (very carefully) calculated risks.

    calculated risk

  4. #14
    Symbolic Herald Vasilisa's Avatar
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    So, you think other types are less inhibited than INFJ? Perhaps. I do sometimes feel inhibited from action by contemplating possibilities. But then there have been other experiences that I just had to try, and dove into, because they presented themselves and struck something inside of me. There are times to plan a move, and times to just move. My job is to make sure I am not in a state where I am closing off either type of occasion. Because imbalance has been known to happen.

    I have a great deal of interest in people's personal stories, experiences and life wisdom. When I learn personal things about people's experiences I hold onto it, see it their way, and imagine being in their skin. Personal stories stay with me that way and I can reference them in the future for additional perspective on something in front of me. But lessons sounds like life is some kind of workbook with an answer key, and most things are just not that way. Its all deeply personal. So for me, its less about templates, but more about tapping into that collective experience of humanity in order to have the ability to provide good counsel for myself and some others.

    What I find interesting about listening to people's stories is that they can be instructive not just for teaching us what to be wary of, but also powerful affirmations of what people can cope with and come through, how hearts can be touched and grow stronger, how people can forgive others and themselves and find peace even after terrible mental, physical, and emotional anguish. Hearing them sometimes helps me feel gratitude for all my good fortune, and admiration of their spiritual/emotional fortitude. They may broaden my perspective, but its still up to me to live my life and take my chances, to not be imprisoned in fear of possibilities or of the unforeseen. That is a kind of atrophy. Its not always easy.

    There is special power in sharing one's own story, too, but for me that is much, much harder.
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  5. #15
    Peaced Quay's Avatar
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    I've generally come to terms that my mistakes are my biggest life lessons. Every once in a while I start beating myself over the head about some retarded poo-poo I did when I was younger that may have hindered my growth/success/blahblah... but on a drive home one day, I concluded that I would probably be in the same spot right now in life no matter which route I took. That was soothing.

    Supposedly I'm INFJ and my younger sister is INFP. I've noticed she has the ability to gather information from others' bad experiences and direct herself in a way that won't lead to the same mistakes. She isn't judgmental about it, she just doesn't involve herself. She just decides she doesn't want the same for herself. Myself...I have the tendency to just live my life and not really pay attention to others' situations until I become involved in them. The experience becomes mine somehow, so I am able to filter out the lessons for myself. This has taken literally years for me to get a healthy grip on.

    (On a side note: As I get older, I notice a lot of my introversion doesn't really have to do with shyness or insecurity, just how much I want to be involved in others' lives.)

  6. #16
    4x9 cascadeco's Avatar
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    Hmm, tough to answer. It's so situational.

    I think when it comes to many relationship-specific things, I am much more cautious and avoidant/risk-averse -- as my baseline personlity goes, at least. So I think the bulk of my earlier years - teens into early 20's - I was primarily Observant and noticing all of the things that could go wrong, and why, etc. So yeah, I would notice the mistakes others made and then incorporate that into my own ideas of what worked in relationships and what I needed to be careful to watch out for or avoid. These days, I think my risk-averseness is very similar to what Coriolis outlined - that I will absolutely take risks if I deem the potential benefits outweigh the costs, or if I deem that the cost/worst-case-scenario is either unlikely or is even 'worth' it due to the benefit.

    Re. non-relationship stuff and life choices in general -- I think there are very few things that I have ever known outright that I absolutely don't like, or don't agree with, or whatever. So I think I'm in general a very curious person, and because I don't have strong black-and-white notions about most things (although I do have key things I AM very solid on, or know without trying that it's 'not me' or I don't want to try), often my way of learning whether I like something or not, or agree with something or not, or if something works with my personality or doesn't, is the act of doing. I might suspect it'll go one way or another prior to my doing it, but I don't know for certain. I also can learn more of who I am by doing - rather than pure thinking or observing. This is more of a recent twist, though.

    Re. learning in general -- I think I do gain bits and pieces from others - absolutely. I mean, especially re. some relationship stuff, I can learn from other peoples' stories and it makes total sense and I know it would be the same for me so I don't need to do it myself - I'd describe these more as universal truths. Other things, though... I may not see them as necessarily universal- they may apply to that one person but I don't know that it applies to me. So that's where I might need to learn by experience.
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