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[INFP] Deeply missing someone with all your heart?

Soar337

New member
Joined
Oct 5, 2009
Messages
387
MBTI Type
INFP
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457
Yet you don't know if they feel the same? :(. Do you do this a lot, especially INFP's? My gut instinct is that they miss me too...they feel the same way yet I don't want to trust this in fear of being let down/heart broken if they don't? So I just let time go on...not contacting them :/
 

copperfish17

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Joined
Dec 13, 2009
Messages
712
MBTI Type
INTP
Enneagram
5w4
Instinctual Variant
sp/so
I think pretty much the only way to find out if they miss you too is to actually contact them. Try. If they reciprocate, great; but even if they don't, you won't lose anything (other than wistful thoughts, I suppose).
 

Arclight

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Nov 5, 2009
Messages
3,177
MBTI Type
INFJ
Enneagram
6w5
I think this sometimes.
I think we might be a little afraid.. A little shell shocked.
But I do miss her sometimes and I would be a bit shocked if she never missed me at all.

I would also not be shocked if she hates me and never wants to speak to me again.
This is why I leave her alone.
 

Virulence

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Jan 5, 2010
Messages
33
MBTI Type
INFJ
I think pretty much the only way to find out if they miss you too is to actually contact them. Try. If they reciprocate, great; but even if they don't, you won't lose anything (other than wistful thoughts, I suppose).

This is very true. That closure is sometimes enough to send you forward and keep you from pining too much for the past, and it's worth it to maybe rekindle a friendship.

The times where you deeply miss someone, after parting on uncertain terms, and have no idea what ultimately became of them or how to contact them... Well, that's really difficult.
 

KDude

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Joined
Jan 26, 2010
Messages
8,243
I contact them. The feeling has been mutual, I guess. If there's a reason I'm distant from someone though, or it's been years, then I take it from there. What you can get out of it is rekindling a friendship on new grounds. If I was somehow attached to some other reason to contact them, I would stay away. Things always change.. everything in life changes.. if I was afraid of facing that, then it isn't going to go well for anyone.
 

Onceajoan

New member
Joined
Apr 22, 2010
Messages
239
MBTI Type
INFJ
Enneagram
1w2
What do you do if you miss someone and it's only been a few hours? Contacting this person and letting him know I miss him seems just a little desperate and clingy?

I want him to miss him like I miss him, but there's no way to know. Neither of us will confess. So, we remain in (or at least I do) in silent agony.
 

KDude

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Joined
Jan 26, 2010
Messages
8,243
What do you do if you miss someone and it's only been a few hours? Contacting this person and letting him know I miss him seems just a little desperate and clingy?

I want him to miss him like I miss him, but there's no way to know. Neither of us will confess. So, we remain in (or at least I do) in silent agony.

I assume you're addressing the OP, but it brought to mind why I didn't even think of that in my own response. It sounded like he meant a more distant longing of some kind, so I didn't think of being away from someone for a couple of hours.

I try to avoid to silent agony. I end up laying out where I'm coming from with someone. I'm usually the first who does it seems. I'll hope for the same, but I don't push it. And if I don't see a sign from them, I don't hope for it to change. I just resign. I don't know if it's the right approach, but that's just me. Some people thought I was wrong for it. I remember being blamed by one girl that I "made her beg" and "do things that girls shouldn't have to do". My response to that was "What? I made my intentions clear.. " She just wanted me to do more and be in some state of constant pining until she made her own feelings known. Then when she realized I was over it, she starts drunk calling me and saying she's sorry. But.. she had her chance. That's how I see it. Not to say that you should do the same to these guys that are giving you some confusion.. but ... don't torture yourself.
 
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