i'm wondering if we can brainstorm what helps us disarm. i'm guessing it's by far the worst for 4w5 and 5w4, and probably worse the more inferior so you get (sx/sp, sp/sx).
i feel like my world is best seen by Ne types. with enps i'm usually good, especially 7w6s. they can see what surrounds me, the actual world i feel like i am experiencing, the possibilities that are in play that are constructing the situation for me. the communication is just great.
i feel like Fi types accept me in a way that puts me at ease. i've noticed this especially with infp 9w1s and enfp 7w6s. they seem to have far superior awareness about my emotional state, and that's incredibly grounding (infp 4w5 have more hesitancy, we both feel accountable to uphold an image of ourselves, and we are both maybe a bit more wary of letting our guard down). their nudges work because they establish trust. i don't know how to say it, they just identify with your feeling space, and when they do that and your feelings are accepted, it's just easier to trust and have faith in the bond between you. at the same time, it can be confusing and induce miscommunications when you feel like while that is extremely special and important to you and then suddenly realize they are able to do that with everyone (the e4 aspects kicking in, wanting to be fundamentally special, set apart, celebrated).
1w2s often seem to be able to put me at ease in particular ways regarding sense of humor. there is no limit to how dark the humor gets. that sense of intellectual freedom in conversation is really enjoyable and helps alleviate social stress because it puts possibilities back in play, and you can be witty in whatever fucking language you know, regardless of how dark that can be.