User Tag List

First 324041424344 Last

Results 411 to 420 of 499

  1. #411
    Senior Member sculpting's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    Posts
    4,226

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Tallulah View Post
    That's what I'm seeing, too, and it looks like it's going to be hard to bridge that gap with each other. When you're starting from such a wildly different basic premise, it's hard to find a common way to view the situation.
    Quote Originally Posted by Tallulah View Post
    I hear what y'all are saying, and it kinda confirms for me my choice to vent in front of people I know will understand where I'm coming from, and won't be conflicted or feel like they're compromising themselves to support me.
    Quote Originally Posted by onemoretime View Post
    In that case, it's just a relationship that shouldn't have happened. It's a shame, but it's time to cut losses on both ends, and find a new arrangement.
    If-as we are exploring-innate cognitive preferences (considered in isolation or as clumps making up personality type, my apologies for the innate sloppiness inherent) do give rise to these misunderstandings...then we are left with cycles that are not specific to individuals but are instead destined to repeat across different types. We just keep hopping until we find an arrangement that works-most likely between folks who think more like ourselves.

    WRT venting Tallulah, once I realized that my Fi venting and emotional lability upset and stressed my ENTP friend, I learned to try and process it somewhat before hand or find another Fi user to rant to. I did this because I love and adore my ENTP best friend and even my other ENTP friends and I want to make sure I dont do things that will frustrate them or add stress to their lives. I also try and very carefully moderate how I use Te as-as can be seen from Time's response-the answers I would innately supply create more harm than good for a TP.

    It likely doesnt matter how much I care for the person or how much money I can offer or that I would take a bullet for them-I have already pissed the TP off enough, totally unintended by stomping all over them, that all of my advice is falling on deaf ears and actually hurting them, not helping them. It generates a defensive mechanism. Just like the MIL did to the FP mom.

    (often I am at the point with FeTi, that I try and apologize in advance. "I am sorry, I realize that I may not phrase things the right way and you may see offense where none was intended. I care for your a great deal and please let me know how I can help as I dont really have the right words to offer")

    Exactly what

    @cascadco-the outlines were pretty sketchy just to illustrate flow of thought. I would actually not give in on step 4 deliverables but I would have several layers of increasing requests for additional responsibility from the other person, but my initial sketch was pretty messy.

  2. #412
    Senior Member sculpting's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    Posts
    4,226

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by onemoretime View Post
    Also, notice the shift in tone - "I've been there" to "You're an idiot for not considering all these things". That first part will be ignored or interpreted as cheap talk so you don't have to feel like an asshole. I take notice of what percentage of the conversation is directed at what issues, and judge accordingly.
    That is the Fi to Te transition point. The first part is meant to imply complete forgiveness and understanding of lack of intent and indicate your values arent flawed internally. the second part is then to objectively view the problem in a way to identify solutions.

    Quote Originally Posted by onemoretime View Post
    My assumption is that they know what they're doing wrong, and I'm not going to tell them unless they ask.
    This is actually not a good idea with a Te user of the FP variety especially who you are trying to influence. They NEED explicit Te action based direction even if they resent it in the moment. (And yes, my ENTP says she thinks all Te users appears to be total fucking morons, "Isnt it obvious what needs to happen next?!!", no and I love you my dearest sweetest ENTP and would do anything for you-but it isnt obvious)

    I left out step 3.5) The other person begins requesting critical feedback on their own actions or behaviors and seeking you to serve as a mentor for them. In the FP mom's case the things she asked me about where "I dont understand how to get the kids to go poop in the potty. what works best? " " I get really angry sometimes and have yell. I really dont know what to do" "I am worried that the baby isnt moving her hands the right way. What should I do?" " I try and clean this house, but it takes so long. I am not sure how to organize it" She was VERY actively seeking Te external guidance steps for improvement and someone to tell her explicitily what she needed to do-but not in a condemnatory way which sets off a defensive response.

  3. #413
    i love skylights's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    MBTI
    INFP
    Enneagram
    6w7 so/sx
    Socionics
    EII Ne
    Posts
    7,835

    Default

    ah, sorry, z buck. i think i make these statements and they sound like they're aimed at someone, but they're not. giving one another the benefit of the doubt was just my general reflection, based off the thread as a whole as it stands, instead of a response to your post. i suppose that wasn't very clear. my meaning was that i need to suspend doubt until things do become clear... like your post itself, it raised my hackles a bit, and in this situation i have to just trust you and suspend my immediate reaction to defend as much as i can...

    Quote Originally Posted by Z Buck McFate
    There seems so be a repeating pattern in these threads where the Fe/Ti (or Ti/Fe) side challenges the definitions of ‘Fe’ being put forth by the Fi/Te side; we are more inclined to see it as ‘final product’, and we get itchy when it isn’t complete- just as Fi/Te gets itchy when behaviors/values don’t seem congruent. And it’s like the Fi/Te side keeps coming back with something equivalent to, “right, that’s why Fi is better”. <- That's the repeating pattern.
    i imagine part of the problem is that we are trying to understand things in our own words, but because we do not use the other party's cognitive process, we do not form the words in the way that the other party would. i have run across this before when conversing with fidelia - she will say something that is, generally, correct about Fi, but it's not worded in the way that i would word it, the way that conveys how it feels to be me and have that perspective. so then i reword it the way i feel, but i suppose that comes off sounding like Fi is better. it's not better, but i feel like a lot of times when Fe users say things about Fi, there is also a slant to it, that implies things that are not quite right.

    i think you are right about the final product, but it frustrates me a little because it sounds like what you're saying is that even if the final product put forth by the Fe user in regards to Fi is not quite right, then we should just suck it up and not address how it's not right? but to me, the whole purpose of the forum is understanding one another, and i would want to know if you thought my take on Fe was not the way you felt about it. i imagine we're running into this on both the Ti/Te and Fi/Fe ends, because Te and Fe just want to be done with it and move on while Ti and Fi are like, wait, that's not right... admittedly i see some of the NTP conversations in the NT forum and am like god that discussion could go on forever, which is true, we could play a game of reductio ad nauseum with anything. i suppose perhaps that is how some NFP discussions feel to you guys, too, but to us this Fi nitty-gritty is what's really important, so we need to get it just right, because if we don't, then we can't proceed correctly...

    the other feeling i get, is that there is a latent sense from some FJs and TPs that Fi is a rather useless function. it's subjective and personal, so how can it be fairly applied to anything? the other functions all have some grounding in the external, but Fi is completely internal. and that sense of uselessness is really annoying. so there's also a feeling, at least on my personal part, of needing to show how Fi is a valuable function, both because i need to prove it to myself for the sake of my own self-worth and because i need to prove it for everyone who relies on Fi as a function. there is this driving sense of needing to prove, we are not worthless. and NFPs on the defense, because we have no inherent ability to block others out short of Te, must resort to lashing out to protect themselves - so some of the seeming attacks you may be feeling may very well be defense.

    this is like the 5th time i've rewritten this response... my first was very emotionally charged, too much so... some part of me wonders if you are going to see in this exchange a metacosm (not really sure that is a word either) of the pattern you described - of you as a Fe/Ti user questioning Fi and me as a Fi user defending. some part of me also wonders if this is not just a pattern that is almost bound to happen, because of the nature of Fi itself in terms of creating a sense of value-identity and necessarily reacting when those values are questioned.

    It’s come up before- in a couple different places I believe- that the people who argue Fe points tend to identify more with ideas, whereas Fi’ers tend to identify more with values. So it seems reasonable to me there may be something to this notion that it’s harder for Fi’ers to digest incongruency between behaviors and stated values. Quite often, though, the people who surface to argue Fe points are aux, tert and even inferior Fe- so this may or may not be accurately representative of Fe. And it's not like a group of people this size is a fair representation of reality. I’d be surprised, actually, if Fe doms related more to ideas than to values.
    my suspicion is that Fe doms, given the ones i know, relate most to people-driven action?

  4. #414
    Senior Member sculpting's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    Posts
    4,226

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Esoteric Wench View Post
    I thought this very profound Orobas! This is EXACTLY how it feels for me. EXACTLY.

    Sometimes I wish I didn't understand these Fi/Te and Fe/Ti differences so well. It's like I've seen behind the curtain now. There is a naive joy in not knowing how differently other people think about the world... Like I used to think that everyone felt the same way about not re-aligning one's values just for the sake of personal allegiance.
    I totally get this. To the point of being really depressed and bummed out-like no matter what I do, those rifts run so deep, as to prevent us from ever really accepting one another. Those barriers will always result in individuals suffering because no matter what we do, we cannot help but apply our negative judgments to those different from us, not understanding they are different-which result in undeserved pain and rejection.

    As of late I have really been trying to avoid thinking about people in Te terms and trying to revert to an Fi outlook. This includes avoiding thinking about typology at all. It is weird as I feel as though to be happy I will need to let the veil close back again and just pretend like I dont see the fissures. Otherwise I just carry around sadness for those who are hurting. I delude myself with my own aux function, and pretend not to see reality for what it is, but at least I can cherish those right in front of me.

  5. #415
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2008
    MBTI
    STP
    Posts
    10,498

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Orobas View Post
    I totally get this. To the point of being really depressed and bummed out-like no matter what I do, those rifts run so deep, as to prevent us from ever really accepting one another. Those barriers will always result in individuals suffering because no matter what we do, we cannot help but apply our negative judgments to those different from us, not understanding they are different-which result in undeserved pain and rejection.

    As of late I have really been trying to avoid thinking about people in Te terms and trying to revert to an Fi outlook. This includes avoiding thinking about typology at all. It is weird as I feel as though to be happy I will need to let the veil close back again and just pretend like I dont see the fissures. Otherwise I just carry around sadness for those who are hurting. I delude myself with my own aux function, and pretend not to see reality for what it is, but at least I can cherish those right in front of me.
    Because you surround yourself with people that are hurting and need help?

  6. #416
    i love skylights's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    MBTI
    INFP
    Enneagram
    6w7 so/sx
    Socionics
    EII Ne
    Posts
    7,835

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by _Poki_ View Post
    Because you surround yourself with people that are hurting and need help?
    do you know anyone who isn't hurting in some way?

  7. #417
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2008
    MBTI
    STP
    Posts
    10,498

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by skylights View Post
    do you know anyone who isn't hurting in some way?
    yes, but a healthy relationship, especially communication wise, allows enough positive to overcome the negative hurt. Though the boundary is that the hurt should never be intentional.

    edit: I dont generally hurt, it comes and goes. Its one thing I am extremely compartmental with. Not by choice, but it just disappears until another point in time.

  8. #418
    i love skylights's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    MBTI
    INFP
    Enneagram
    6w7 so/sx
    Socionics
    EII Ne
    Posts
    7,835

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by _Poki_ View Post
    yes, but a healthy relationship, especially communication wise, allows enough positive to overcome the negative hurt. Though the boundary is that the hurt should never be intentional.

    edit: I dont generally hurt, it comes and goes. Its one thing I am extremely compartmental with. Not by choice, but it just disappears until another point in time.
    yeah, true.

    @ edit - ah, very interesting. i feel like i have a little underlying "thread" of hurt that is always present... i guess sort of like a sound wave, that can amplify based on situations.

    Quote Originally Posted by Orobas
    I totally get this. To the point of being really depressed and bummed out-like no matter what I do, those rifts run so deep, as to prevent us from ever really accepting one another. Those barriers will always result in individuals suffering because no matter what we do, we cannot help but apply our negative judgments to those different from us, not understanding they are different-which result in undeserved pain and rejection.

    As of late I have really been trying to avoid thinking about people in Te terms and trying to revert to an Fi outlook. This includes avoiding thinking about typology at all. It is weird as I feel as though to be happy I will need to let the veil close back again and just pretend like I dont see the fissures. Otherwise I just carry around sadness for those who are hurting. I delude myself with my own aux function, and pretend not to see reality for what it is, but at least I can cherish those right in front of me.

    i understand the frustration you're feeling too... but i also think that the capacity of humanity in and of itself is so much more powerful than any of this, that it's got to be strong enough to reach across these cognition gaps. perhaps my mom and my closest couple of friends will never be able to quite understand my Fi because they are FJs, and my dad and brother because they are NTPs, but they are still the people in this world who mean the most to me and who i want around. i don't think we have to eliminate the rifts so much as just attempt to bridge over them... just because we can never fill them, does not mean we can never cross them... there are so many other things besides cognition patterns as hypothesized by this silly little MBTI system that draw people together, similar backgrounds and especially similar experiences, inside jokes and little relationship quirks, cute little notes and flowers and sharing a look from across a crowded room and running on the beach and setting off fireworks and sneaking out of the house when you were little and singing like crazy in the car while everyone else looks at you like you're totally nuts... i think it's wonderful to embrace a Fi outlook but i suspect we don't need to reject Te either because Te can help us see where we need to make our bridges, and what to make them out of, just how long they need to be and how to maintain them... and we know that suffering is not just because of cognitive difference, one ENFP i know drives me completely batshit insane. yet wouldn't it be unfortunate if there were no rifts, if there was no mystery or difference or newness in the world?

    hey, after all, you and i are Ne doms, i have full faith in there being a loophole around this and our ability to find it and exploit it for every little bit of love and connection that it's worth

  9. #419
    Dreaming the life onemoretime's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2009
    MBTI
    3h50
    Socionics
    ILE
    Posts
    4,460

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Orobas View Post
    That is the Fi to Te transition point. The first part is meant to imply complete forgiveness and understanding of lack of intent and indicate your values arent flawed internally. the second part is then to objectively view the problem in a way to identify solutions.
    Doesn't work. Remember, our emotions are very much caught up in our objective thought process. There's just no way to separate it. I'm comfortable in my intent - once I've been bitten, and am taking responsibility, I'm not lying to myself about intent, nor to others. I expect you to believe me, because you're my friend. The second half - don't do it for me! That comes across as very patronizing. You talk that way to children, not other adults.

    I left out step 3.5) The other person begins requesting critical feedback on their own actions or behaviors and seeking you to serve as a mentor for them. In the FP mom's case the things she asked me about where "I dont understand how to get the kids to go poop in the potty. what works best? " " I get really angry sometimes and have yell. I really dont know what to do" "I am worried that the baby isnt moving her hands the right way. What should I do?" " I try and clean this house, but it takes so long. I am not sure how to organize it" She was VERY actively seeking Te external guidance steps for improvement and someone to tell her explicitily what she needed to do-but not in a condemnatory way which sets off a defensive response.
    The issue here is that wording things this way crosses circuits - I wouldn't know whether to comfort her for her troubles, or give practical advice. It's also giving off a sense of helplessness, instead of inner strength and resolve. Constantly saying "I don't understand" "I don't know" etc. doesn't give off a sense of competence, and makes efforts seem futile.

  10. #420
    reborn PeaceBaby's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    MBTI
    INFP
    Enneagram
    937 so/sx
    Posts
    6,226

    Default

    Sorry for the wall of text. :blushing:

    Quote Originally Posted by Z Buck McFate View Post
    My point overall here is, it sounds to me like a lot of us are actually describing the same thing from different ends. It’s just that Fe’ers are more impatient with the process? They want the emo to be decided, they want the conclusion faster- they don’t want to put all the time into it themselves when others might have answers. We don’t relish in exploring that stuff the way Fi’ers do?
    Thanks for your post, Z Buck. I agree with this, and I feel the Fe impatience with emotion (generally) and, not only that, Te is impatient too ... everyone wants the good emotions, and want to be rid of the bad as quickly as possible, or to be able to attribute them to something outside themselves, thus be rid of them too. Sometimes to me it seems like few people place importance on the fine details of exploring emotion, and want to rush forward to what I call an "80% solution" - Te and Fe both. And yes, you can tell me that there's a level of diminished return trying to define the small stuff, and I do agree with that, but there are times when going the extra 20% makes a significant positive difference, not only in understanding but in resultant action.

    I lack the precision, energy or capability to explain this much better, and for that I apologize. (Curse you introverted function fatigue!)

    -----

    Quote Originally Posted by Tallulah View Post
    Also, I wanted to say that I definitely agree with fidelia about feeling the negative emotions physically, too. To the point where I feel ill, anxious, shaky, etc. So in a way, it is something that needs to be purged, and the sooner, the better. Having a new perspective or an action to take is the only thing that lifts it. Examining the emotion for the emotion's sake only makes me feel worse.
    Yes, negative emotions make me feel that way too, they sure aren't a pleasure to explore, and I do want to be rid of them too. It's not necessarily perspective or action that purges them, although those contemplations might be part of my action plan to do so - it's understanding "why?" that ultimately matters. "Why am I feeling this way?" I need to examine the emotion, define, pick it apart, much like I imagine Ti needs to examine all of the inner workings too.

    -----

    Quote Originally Posted by fidelia View Post
    Well, one of the reasons that I participate so much in these Fe-Fi threads is that in teaching, I'm frequently dealing with immature Fi users and it's helpful to at least have an idea of what language is more effective for them. In my close personal life, there are a couple of cases of Fi users who are greatly impacting their kids by what they do/don't do, but I realize that anything I would naturally do to try to improve the situation is not going to be received as being loving. I care too much to just shrug my shoulders and walk away, so right now I'm kind of at an impasse.
    I am very glad you care. Do you deal with immature Fe users too when teaching? How do you approach them? (As an aside, I think I prefer the use of the word "young" in this context rather than immature, since immature is best used IMO for someone older who perhaps hasn't yet gained a certain level of mastery.)

    It's hard for me not to hear judgement about other people throughout this paragraph as I read it though, even as I am typing my responding paragraph with total respect and compassion towards you, knowing that you have continually shown yourself to be a genuine, good and caring person on this forum. Phrases like "frequently dealing with immature Fi users", "Fi users who are greatly impacting their kids by what they do/don't do", "I care too much to just shrug my shoulders" ... all these sound like you already have a negative opinion, and someone has to prove themselves better in order for you to change it. It feels hard to be saddled with the weight of that emotional judgement right out of the gate. And I truly believe you when you say you would change your opinion with new data coming in, if you saw people making an "effort" to be better. It's simply challenging for me to read it and feel neutral, and believe that you are neutral, and that you believe in me. IDK, Fe doms would just say it plain, and I find that less difficult to read somehow, maybe it's more like Te? Just exploring this too so I can understand it better myself.

    Anyway, I have let more of my natural, non-neutral phrasing show here on the forum, and I don't know that has helped much either to any greater appreciation of the Fi perspective. But I do know that no matter what any of us do, there will always be someone who doesn't think well of us, or like us, even if we try our very best to be understanding and caring and meet the needs of those around us the very best we can.

    Would the best thing we can do, when we don't speak the native language of another person, is just find a better translator than us, and work through that person to effect change instead? So, we are still involved and trying and using every tool we have at our disposal - not expecting to be experts in using it ourselves, but recognizing when the tool is most appropriate to be put into use.

    IDK, what do you think?

    -----

    Quote Originally Posted by uumlau View Post
    Te, especially in the Fi perspective, is how to handle all those things that one has to do that one would really rather not do. Emotion is detached, and you just do them. Sticking emotion context on them only confuses.

    The Fi is where the motivation lies, but it comes from within, not from without. So you build motivation in Fi (in others) by allowing them to try and fail without fearing failure. Not that you coddle them - rather you can say things in a "harsher" way without emotion, pointing out what was done right and wrong, without any hint that one is displeased. That it's OK to fail, but one just keeps working at it. You teach them by letting them be themselves, within limits.
    @bold: yes

    I already responded to this a bit earlier in thread, feeling it would be hard for Fe to not communicate displeasure when they feel it, even indirectly, but wanted to add, and I'm not sure how it fits - I always wanted to know why we were doing something. Once there was a why ... I could fit in into a context and thus could get engaged. When I took uni level calculus, and we got to a certain point in the learning, I got very lost. Didn't do well in that class at all. A few years later, I was watching a PBS-style show with a prof teaching calculus and he explained what calculus was meant to explore, why it was important and what it could do. I felt like the blinders were lifted from my confusion and all of a sudden, it made sense to me! Oooh, that's WHY we take calculus! Then I could invest in it. It just didn't immediately fit into a context I could see. I didn't (and don't) need a step-by-step per se, I just need to know WHY this will be useful to me.

    -----

    Quote Originally Posted by fidelia View Post
    I've noticed that Fi is bigger on trust and less on respect. In some ways it cuts people more slack and in others it has higher expectations.
    Hmm, I am not sure about that; I have more expectations on myself, and generally have learned to only hold myself to those standards, realizing they are not universal at all. So, I guess I don't really know if Fi is bigger on one or the other, and I think that is hard to define.

    -----

    Quote Originally Posted by Z Buck McFate View Post
    There seems so be a repeating pattern in these threads where the Fe/Ti (or Ti/Fe) side challenges the definitions of ‘Fe’ being put forth by the Fi/Te side; we are more inclined to see it as ‘final product’, and we get itchy when it isn’t complete- just as Fi/Te gets itchy when behaviors/values don’t seem congruent. And it’s like the Fi/Te side keeps coming back with something equivalent to, “right, that’s why Fi is better”. <- That's the repeating pattern. I’m guessing (maybe hoping) this is because it isn’t complete, which is hard for us to understand. As long as the Fi’ers try to slip some form of “right, that’s why Fi is better” into the recipe- Ti is going to reject it. Much in the way Fe venting seems like back-stabbing and deceitful behavior, because it isn’t presenting a face to the world where behavior and values are already congruent: the tendency to constantly bias definitions (which we mistake as finished product) seems seedy and manipulative, because they aren’t already accurate and fair.
    Z Buck, I felt sad reading this whole post. And I am not expressing that emotion in order to make you or any other Fe user take any kind of action. Just hoping to make that clear. I personally don't think Fi or Fe is better, and I have endeavored to maintain neutrality on that while trying to explain how things appear from this side of the fence. What I find challenging as an Fi user is that the default position of Fe is that it is the most correct. Continually in these threads, I feel like I struggle for the Fi position to be seen as valid, equal. Legitimate. I try to explain it in the best way I can. And from my vantage point, Fe stands slight askance and says, "Well, still, that's just not right. We don't get it." It's hard to feel that sense of being misunderstood, and I realize me saying so is cliche too. Fi users don't totally get Fe either. But we are all trying, and I guess that's a wonderful thing in and of itself. I myself have more appreciation for the Fe vantage point from these threads, and previously I thought I was very Fe savvy, moreso than most. Do you think Fe users have more appreciation of Fi participating? Or is it more like ... ya whatever, Fi whinging over and over and over again.

    So it seems reasonable to me there may be something to this notion that it’s harder for Fi’ers to digest incongruency between behaviors and stated values.
    Thanks, but see, even here, an Fi notion ... no offense Z Buck, because I respect you so very much for your thoughts and sharing on this forum, and have proven your good intentions time and time again. Still, there's the word notion:

    no·tion   
    –noun
    1. a general understanding; vague or imperfect conception or idea of something: a notion of how something should be done.
    2. an opinion, view, or belief: That's his notion, not mine.
    3. conception or idea: his notion of democracy.
    4. a fanciful or foolish idea; whim: She had a notion to swim in the winter.

    We are saying - it is more than a notion. Notion implies kind of a vague, frivolous silliness on our part. And I know you don't mean it like that.

    *sigh* idk if me pointing this stuff out helps any at all. Words that describe inner or emotional states have to be crystal-clear perfect for me is all. Notion as a word feels too vague and kind of invalidating.

    Quote Originally Posted by skylights View Post
    i think you are right about the final product, but it frustrates me a little because it sounds like what you're saying is that even if the final product put forth by the Fe user in regards to Fi is not quite right, then we should just suck it up and not address how it's not right? but to me, the whole purpose of the forum is understanding one another, and i would want to know if you thought my take on Fe was not the way you felt about it. i imagine we're running into this on both the Ti/Te and Fi/Fe ends, because Te and Fe just want to be done with it and move on while Ti and Fi are like, wait, that's not right... admittedly i see some of the NTP conversations in the NT forum and am like god that discussion could go on forever, which is true, we could play a game of reductio ad nauseum with anything. i suppose perhaps that is how some NFP discussions feel to you guys, too, but to us this Fi nitty-gritty is what's really important, so we need to get it just right, because if we don't, then we can't proceed correctly...

    the other feeling i get, is that there is a latent sense from some FJs and TPs that Fi is a rather useless function. it's subjective and personal, so how can it be fairly applied to anything? the other functions all have some grounding in the external, but Fi is completely internal. and that sense of uselessness is really annoying. so there's also a feeling, at least on my personal part, of needing to show how Fi is a valuable function, both because i need to prove it to myself for the sake of my own self-worth and because i need to prove it for everyone who relies on Fi as a function. there is this driving sense of needing to prove, we are not worthless. and NFPs on the defense, because we have no inherent ability to block others out short of Te, must resort to lashing out to protect themselves - so some of the seeming attacks you may be feeling may very well be defense.
    I can relate to this post.

    -----

    Anyhoo, I am sure if we were to meet IRL, these little differences between us, that sometimes seem so large in writing, would vanish amidst our collective desire to care about and understand each other.

    <3 to all.
    "Remember always that you not only have the right to be an individual, you have an obligation to be one."
    Eleanor Roosevelt


    "When people see some things as beautiful,
    other things become ugly.
    When people see some things as good,
    other things become bad."
    Lao Tzu, Tao Te Ching

Similar Threads

  1. [Fi] The One Where an Inferior Fi User Groundlessly Speculates about FPs...
    By Wind Up Rex in forum The NF Idyllic (ENFP, INFP, ENFJ, INFJ)
    Replies: 38
    Last Post: 08-07-2013, 10:06 AM
  2. [Fe] When an Fe user verbally rants....
    By sculpting in forum The NF Idyllic (ENFP, INFP, ENFJ, INFJ)
    Replies: 12
    Last Post: 10-28-2009, 11:01 AM
  3. [NF] theory about Fe & Fi
    By lorkan in forum The NF Idyllic (ENFP, INFP, ENFJ, INFJ)
    Replies: 80
    Last Post: 02-23-2009, 06:37 PM
  4. auxilary Fe/Fi detectives
    By entropie in forum General Psychology
    Replies: 1
    Last Post: 10-06-2008, 09:37 PM
  5. Fe/Fi interactions with Te/Ti
    By proteanmix in forum Myers-Briggs and Jungian Cognitive Functions
    Replies: 10
    Last Post: 09-20-2007, 10:20 PM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
Single Sign On provided by vBSSO