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  1. #1
    Unlimited Dancemoves ® AgentF's Avatar
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    Default The Asperger's Appreciation Thread!

    i've seen several references to asperger's on the forum. if i recall correctly, most of them were coming from NFs who had some kind of special bond with people having asperger's.

    i've a nephew who i suspect has asperger's and i used to manage a man who had it. i feel really protective about them both, although i never seem able to get to their inner core (they actually seem inside out...or maybe it's like Dr. Horrible said, and there are 3 layers. anyway! ENFP moment). my nephew struggles with anger and i'm the only one who seems to be able to calm him down. my former team-mate was a wreck anytime someone spoke to him, except for me...i'm the only one he gave direct eye contact to.

    anyway, i think they're under-appreciated. what have been your experiences?

    and also curious: has anyone dated someone with asperger's? my nephew's now interested in girls and i'm wondering what lies ahead for him.
    I may be kindly, I am ordinarily gentle, but in my line of business I am obliged to will terribly what I will at all.
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  2. #2
    Senior Member Synapse's Avatar
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    Whats your nephew angry about?
    Talk more about this topic, why don't people with asperger's like to give direct eye contact?

  3. #3
    Member Torai's Avatar
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    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Synapse View Post
    Whats your nephew angry about?
    Talk more about this topic, why don't people with Asperger's like to give direct eye contact?
    Cause of hypersensitivity. Eye contact feels uncomfortable to us because we can go into sensory overload if we look people in the eye.

  4. #4
    Senior Member Moonflower's Avatar
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    Are there any other NFs besides me who have Asperger's?

    When I go to groups for people with AS (both real-life and online), it seems that around 70% of the people are INTs of some sort (INTP seems like the #1 type). SJs aren't too uncommon, either, and IS_Ps (mostly ISTPs) pop up from time to time. I don't think I've ever met a fellow NF with Asperger's though. That could explain why I never feel like I fit in among other Asperger's people.

  5. #5
    Member Torai's Avatar
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    NF's with Asperger's are pretty damn common, in my opinion. They're just clever at hiding it.

  6. #6
    Vaguely Precise Seymour's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Torai View Post
    NF's with Asperger's are pretty damn common, in my opinion. They're just clever at hiding it.
    I find that interesting, since as an INFP I seem to devote a lot of mental energy toward building a mental model of what the other person is thinking and feeling. Given that people with Asperger's have a hard time with developing a real theory of mind, it makes me think their subjective experience would be quite different.

    Having the emotional hypersensitivity without a theory of mind would seem to make for a chaotic experience, where one would seem to be bombarded by the perceptions of random emotions from people whose motivations were almost always opaque. Sounds scary and stressful.

  7. #7
    Unlimited Dancemoves ® AgentF's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Synapse View Post
    Whats your nephew angry about?
    Talk more about this topic, why don't people with asperger's like to give direct eye contact?
    in my nephew's case, everything. likely the root cause is his parent's divorce when he was 6. but he really seems to lack people management skills, except for a few of us who aren't deterred and love him effusively regardless of how standoffish he seems. he looks down a lot. i suspect eye contact is too intense for him. even with me, he will hardly look me in the eye. but he will always let me into his room to talk to him after an emotional outburst. usually not others. interestingly enough, the most popular girl in school has a crush on him!
    Last edited by AgentF; 01-21-2011 at 02:32 PM. Reason: spelling
    I may be kindly, I am ordinarily gentle, but in my line of business I am obliged to will terribly what I will at all.
    ~ Catherine the Great


    7w6 ❣ sx/so ❤ physical touch ❥ sanguine 70%, choleric 30% ❦

    Johari.

  8. #8
    Unlimited Dancemoves ® AgentF's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Torai View Post
    Cause of hypersensitivity. Eye contact feels uncomfortable to us because we can go into sensory overload if we look people in the eye.
    the man i recently dated tests as INTJ and often INTP...he said he reserves eye contact for people he knows well/trusts, as it's too intimate otherwise. as a result, our first date was spent almost entirely in profile.
    I may be kindly, I am ordinarily gentle, but in my line of business I am obliged to will terribly what I will at all.
    ~ Catherine the Great


    7w6 ❣ sx/so ❤ physical touch ❥ sanguine 70%, choleric 30% ❦

    Johari.

  9. #9
    Post Human Post Qlip's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by agentfurrina View Post
    the man i recently dated tests as INTJ and often INTP...he said he reserves eye contact for people he knows well/trusts, as it's too intimate otherwise. as a result, our first date was spent almost entirely in profile.
    I don't know if this is on topic, but, how did you meet him, and who asked out who?

  10. #10
    Starcrossed Seafarer Aquarelle's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by agentfurrina View Post

    and also curious: has anyone dated someone with asperger's? my nephew's now interested in girls and i'm wondering what lies ahead for him.
    I've never dated a guy with Asperger's, but I have a friend who has it and he is now engaged.
    Masquerading as a normal person day after day is exhausting.

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