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Thread: INFJ or INFP or another Type?

  1. #31
    Large Member Array Ender's Avatar
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    I may fall into most of the more stereotypical INFP traits, at least when it comes to dealing with people/relationships, and I do get along really well with other NF's in most cases, I can't stand the Emo attitude, and if I catch myself falling into any type of slump like that I do what I can too pull myself out of it. I may bitch about things in my life, but it's more just venting frustration.

    Then again, a few people seem to question whether I'm INFP, or ISTP, since my hobbies and interests are more ISTP then INFP. I don't really relate well to ISTP's tho, I tend to find them somewhat stuck up or cold.
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  2. #32
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    Quote Originally Posted by TK
    Going back to the topic question. In general, INFPs are much more passive and floaty than INFJs. INFJs get things done. INFPs sit around daydreaming about getting things done.
    Answer directed at Shadow and TK both: I get the things done that matter. I see no need to waste my time and everyone else's with the nervous busy work that J types enjoy so much and the nervous Fe chatter the Fe dom engage in, nitpicking the fabric of life apart until it can no longer hold its form, refusing to face their own inner toxic messes and projecting their misery onto the people around them. Frankly I would rather be seen as "emo" and "narcisstic" than to go around punishing others for my own pains because I could not stand to face my own disappointments and shortcomings. To each their own however.

  3. #33
    Senior Member Array sciski's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ender View Post
    I can't stand the Emo attitude, and if I catch myself falling into any type of slump like that I do what I can too pull myself out of it. I may bitch about things in my life, but it's more just venting frustration.
    Yeah, we're pretty self-aware on the emo front. I's are pretty good at pulling themselves out of a slump.

    It really does look like Fi/Fe is the huge, major, gaping difference between xNFJs and xNFPs. I disagree with TK about INFPs being black holes - I think the black hole is between Fi and Fe, not carried by either party. Anything you try to throw across to the other side gets sucked in. I'm sure there's a beautiful metaphor we can expand upon about how you can build a logical bridge to communicate over the force of the black hole. Actually it's not so much a black hole as it is a tornado that sucks everything in, then spits everything out in a messed up form so that the message the other person gets is entirely misunderstood!

    Or possibly, Fi is a black hole, Fe is a tornado.. or you can take a metaphor too far..

  4. #34
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ender View Post
    I may fall into most of the more stereotypical INFP traits, at least when it comes to dealing with people/relationships, and I do get along really well with other NF's in most cases, I can't stand the Emo attitude, and if I catch myself falling into any type of slump like that I do what I can too pull myself out of it. I may bitch about things in my life, but it's more just venting frustration.

    Then again, a few people seem to question whether I'm INFP, or ISTP, since my hobbies and interests are more ISTP then INFP. I don't really relate well to ISTP's tho, I tend to find them somewhat stuck up or cold.
    Hey, ISTPs are more openly affectionate and child-like and easy going than an INFP from what I've been learning. My ISTP best friend can be stuck up, sure, but she is open, easy going and excitin to be around. Mistaken for being an extrovert. Your hobbies ARE very different than an INFP. And more dare-devilish. INFP Fi is concentrated on their feelings and it's hard to disengage (not to make them sound brooding---) as it's their 1st Cognitive Process. I'd think it'd be harder for them to disconnect from their emotions easily. The metaphor TK made is POWERFUL and it really makes me agree with it. And then sciski's tornado with Fe is POWERFUL too. But to carry the black hole further, an Fe will suck it IN and spit it OUT whereas Fi sucks IN and keeps it IN.

    It's just that both sucking Dom Fi and sucking/spitting out Fe will depend on the person's maturity with dealing on both fronts. But you still prefer one or the other.

    An ISTP reacts to emotions as they come, which can make them seem superifical at times but they just "finish it" and move on (unless it's a deeper feeling, w/e that may be). I really believe you to be an ISTP.

    But you already know that

  5. #35
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    Quote Originally Posted by heart View Post
    Answer directed at Shadow and TK both: I get the things done that matter. I see no need to waste my time and everyone else's with the nervous busy work that J types enjoy so much and the nervous Fe chatter the Fe dom engage in, nitpicking the fabric of life apart until it can no longer hold its form, refusing to face their own inner toxic messes and projecting their misery onto the people around them. Frankly I would rather be seen as "emo" and "narcisstic" than to go around punishing others for my own pains because I could not stand to face my own disappointments and shortcomings. To each their own however.
    Thank you! INFPs CAN get things done (aware INFJs can do it too! ), they just won't extert Fe to check on everyone! I don't know about the nervous busy work about Js though. I like it quiet and focused and away from people (when not directly involving them). There's a HUGE misconception that Ps are not doers and J's are or more organized. Or on the Communication Styles. INFPs do Informing while INFJs do Directing. An ISTP seems like the stereotypical "J" (I hate reading J or P or F or T singlyto describe Types!!!!). They are Directing with communication! It's something I'd like to see made more aware of in general for people.

    An INFP can go around punishing other's by not 'sharing' ("I'm not telling you.") just as an INFJ can go around punishing other's because they feel that person is not 'sharing' ("What's wrong? Tell me if you want.") or 'sharing appropriately' lolol

    Refusing to face the inner toxic mess really applies to INFJ Fe but I don't know about projecting their missery onto people. I try my best to HIDE it from others and I'm sure INFJs will agree. Under extreme stress is another story, we then project and feel "disconnected" and "Not myself". Later, when better and crashing, get saddened that we did that. It's helped me to grow from such experiences though and not take the blame for other's problems or stop taking the blame. Or feeling guitly for my being rejected when someone wrongfully turns on me "for not taking their side" or whatnot. I don't like taking sides in such a way, I'd rather people see the misunderstandings b/w them! OR if I do, I base it on fairness not on partial means. If my best friend is wrong in hurting someone's feelings, I'm quick to tell her that. She may not care but I feel I'm helping both her (to realise) and the person she's hurt (by protecting their feelings).

    And the emo/narcisstic crap about INFPs can apply to INFJs too (when they 'fracture' under stress). Or ANY type when they have problems lol It's just how we display it that's different or during different times of stress points. People upon seeing me only sometimes accuse me of being "sad" or "forlorn" when I'm deeply thinking or worrying about someone or a project or anything. Sometimes I look happy or excited but during more 'happier' topics. I've read INFJs have been frequently accused of this.

    I think any INFJ or INFP can evolve, depending on rearing, circumstances + epiphanies

  6. #36
    Senior Member Array Griffi97's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by DeliriousDisposition View Post
    . INFP Fi is concentrated on their feelings and it's hard to disengage (not to make them sound brooding---) as it's their 1st Cognitive Process. I'd think it'd be harder for them to disconnect from their emotions easily. The metaphor TK made is POWERFUL and it really makes me agree with it. And then sciski's tornado with Fe is POWERFUL too. But to carry the black hole further, an Fe will suck it IN and spit it OUT whereas Fi sucks IN and keeps it IN.

    It's just that both sucking Dom Fi and sucking/spitting out Fe will depend on the person's maturity with dealing on both fronts. But you still prefer one or the other.
    It's sweeping statements like these that make me completely uninterested in learning more about the Cognitive Processes. This is way overinterpreting, IMO.

    Quote Originally Posted by DeliriousDisposition View Post
    Hey, ISTPs are more openly affectionate and child-like and easy going than an INFP from what I've been learning.
    I'm married to an INFP and my only sister is married to an ISTP. Based on my experience with these two types, this statement is patently untrue.

  7. #37
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    I know an ISTP who is an exacting a hole with his wife, everything is her fault and his life would be paradise if only she would do x, y, z and on and on.

  8. #38
    Senior Member Array theshadow's Avatar
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    Heart. I am very interested in what you have to say. below are questions I have for you regarding your last response. I would like to warn you though that they may feel like nitpicking so its entirely up to you if you should precede. "I might advise against it.".

    Quote Originally Posted by heart View Post
    Answer directed at Shadow and TK both: I get the things done that matter. I see no need to waste my time and everyone else's with the nervous busy work that J types enjoy so much and the nervous Fe chatter the Fe dom engage in, nitpicking the fabric of life apart until it can no longer hold its form, refusing to face their own inner toxic messes and projecting their misery onto the people around them. Frankly I would rather be seen as "emo" and "narcisstic" than to go around punishing others for my own pains because I could not stand to face my own disappointments and shortcomings. To each their own however.
    first of all heart. I feel the intensity in what your saying. im not sure I really appreciate being subject to claims I did not make. but since you did I will go ahead and respond. "I never said that infp's did not get things done, in fact I said what they did was "well felt out" meaning they did what they needed to".

    I am very curious know. what do you mean "nervous chatter"? I understand what the intended tone is. what is "nervous chatter"? Fe in a way is very similar to Te and its tendancy to make decisions, the that the chatter your talking about? or do you mean literally that their communications is nervous chatter? perhaps your suggesting a lack of awareness? or maybe simply different values as what should and should not be said?


    Frankly I would rather be seen as "emo" and "narcisstic" than to go around punishing others for my own pains because I could not stand to face my own disappointments and shortcomings.
    whos shortcomings? were you refering to me and tk? "if you were thats completely ok but I would like to know"

    To each their own however.
    this is somthing I do have a really hard time understanding. clearly you are very passionate about what you wrote. this last qualifyr automatically made me go "huh she doesnt believe it?" yet you are still not sure if you are correct? from my general perspective if something does not apply to others "or in any real way" in what way is it true? I am learning "thx to discussions such as these" how to understand different models of truth .

    I certainly, and in no way, am I trying to punish others. I am interested in understanding them though. how besides asking questions about my differences with someone else can I find the answers to these questions?

  9. #39
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    You gave general observations about NFPs, I gave some I have about NFJ. Nothing more than that.

    The part about INFP not getting as much done was in relation to what TK said.

    I am no more emotional about what I said than you were.

  10. #40
    Senior Member Array theshadow's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by heart View Post
    You gave general observations about NFPs, I gave some I have about NFJ. Nothing more than that.

    The part about INFP not getting as much done was in relation to what TK said.

    I am no more emotional about what I said than you were.
    ok heart

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