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Thread: INFJ or INFP or another Type?

  1. #101
    Senior Member Array "?"'s Avatar
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    I have been going to her site(s) for a few years as she developed it. Vicky Jo is a remarkable person and if I could afford to spend the money, would hire her as a coach. The sites are good and she puts things in such a common sense manner. I just started a thread on the feeling dichotomy, but for years I have wondered how gender expectations effect males, in particularly INFJs. It would seem that since the type is the most cerebral and conceputal of all NFs, the type could easily confuse itself as NT or a strong T. I would think it is more prevalent in males.

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    Senior Member Array Dark Razor's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by "?" View Post
    I have been going to her site(s) for a few years as she developed it. Vicky Jo is a remarkable person and if I could afford to spend the money, would hire her as a coach. The sites are good and she puts things in such a common sense manner. I just started a thread on the feeling dichotomy, but for years I have wondered how gender expectations effect males, in particularly INFJs. It would seem that since the type is the most cerebral and conceputal of all NFs, the type could easily confuse itself as NT or a strong T. I would think it is more prevalent in males.
    Yea I've been wondering for some time now whether I am actually an NFJ, especially now that I work together with many TJs I have noticed that I am not quite like them. Though I also do not really identify with the INFJ profile.

  3. #103
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    Quote Originally Posted by "?" View Post
    I have been going to her site(s) for a few years as she developed it. Vicky Jo is a remarkable person and if I could afford to spend the money, would hire her as a coach. The sites are good and she puts things in such a common sense manner. I just started a thread on the feeling dichotomy, but for years I have wondered how gender expectations effect males, in particularly INFJs. It would seem that since the type is the most cerebral and conceputal of all NFs, the type could easily confuse itself as NT or a strong T. I would think it is more prevalent in males.
    I think it might seem more prevalent in males, depending on how they were raised and their enviornment, but if females were allowed to develop w/o the natural bias placed on them to appear more girly-whathaveyou, it may seem more prevalent in them too. Or with any other Type, both ways.

    I think INFJ seems easily confused b/c one might not be able to see the motivation (Fe) which is personal to the INFJ but they may not display that as hard as they can in a more 'emotional way' for fear of seeming biased (Fi is weak, they initially distrust it)--- unless they are so upset/disturbed that they seem more 'emotional' than usual and are deemed out of character as they might normally seem a 'cool' and nice person.

    I don't like using one 'letter T' to describe a whole type, NT or NF etc is more preferrable but not entirely so. I say this b/c any xxTx or an xxFx Type can seem more gushy or more cold, dependent on their entire life's upbringing and other factors. It's in understanding the differening motivations and how one might come across that can help discern types.

    For instance, my 15 yr old sis is an INTJ. She is very much openly and overly affectionate with ME and my best/f whom she trusts but with no one else. We both loathe our parents, she considers me more a parental figure (I'm only 7 years older). She maintains a 'cool' or sarcastic demeanor with her 'friends' (whom she tolerates). She used to be very critical of others, whom rightly deserved it, but I taught her to be more patient and understanding--- she's mostly changed, and she does blame me for it lol, but sometimes she'll argue (if I disagree with her) that "This person deserved it. I could care less of their 'past' molding them into the ass they are now. Too bad. Your past can hurt you but it shouldn't make you any more stupid than you naturally are!" or something like that lol She's learned to restrain from commenting on the stupidity she sees around her but sometimes she'll Freudian slip a "Jackass" or "Are you stupid?!" by mistake and then apologise to the kid/s... her first year of gr.9 is ruining my efforts!

    With most people she's nice but she's not open with them as she doesn't feel comfortable if she doesn't know people that well. INTJs, from what I've learned, will show their true colours/feelings to those they trust/love/care for and will not to others, unless they have evolved emotionally.

    I'm wondering, myself, how to one day display the differences of females and males within Types.

  4. #104
    4x9 Array cascadeco's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by DeliriousDisposition View Post
    I'm wondering, myself, how to one day display the differences of females and males within Types.
    You know...once you factor in experiences, maturity, healthiness, gender, etc etc etc....don't you move farther and farther away from mbti type being practical? By the time you factor in everything, it seems to me you're just starting to talk more about people on an individual level (i.e. 'We're all different and we're all unique'), and you start removing Type completely from the picture. Of course I ultimately think this is more 'real' anyway, because we ARE all individual and complex, but it seems the more you dig into it, the less of a 'point' there is in even using type. Just to play devil's advocate here.

    (and by the way, my usage of 'You' in that paragraph is directed at everyone at large, not you in particular, DeliriousDisposition!)
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  5. #105
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    Quote Originally Posted by cascademn View Post
    You know...once you factor in experiences, maturity, healthiness, gender, etc etc etc....don't you move farther and farther away from mbti type being practical? By the time you factor in everything, it seems to me you're just starting to talk more about people on an individual level (i.e. 'We're all different and we're all unique'), and you start removing Type completely from the picture. Of course I ultimately think this is more 'real' anyway, because we ARE all individual and complex, but it seems the more you dig into it, the less of a 'point' there is in even using type. Just to play devil's advocate here.

    (and by the way, my usage of 'You' in that paragraph is directed at everyone at large, not you in particular, DeliriousDisposition!)
    kekeke I figured you'd play the devil's advocate once I began reading your post! And yes, you're very right, we move away from the typical understanding of our Type if we all become emotionally healthy and use well the full spectrum of CP. People are balanced then (hurray!) but the only difference in discerning b/w Types at that point is in knowing the person's motivations and how one might express oneself based on Type. An INFJs motivations and expressing will still be different than an ESTPs, for the most part. Also, it still shows that while an INFJ will become more outgoing (and sometimes is initially seen so anyway), they might not handle it as well as an ESTP as being around too many people might be hard to 'focus' + it drains them (just not as quickly lol), whereas an ESTP might learn to appreciate being alone but will still feel 'energized' by being with others. (I don't know ESTPs, but am just using them as an example )

    And even an evolved INFJ is different than another evolved INFJ as we take in all life exp. and their personal preferrences based on their life exp. But their motivations and expressions will be similar but may be displayed differently at different times. Hope I made sense lol

  6. #106
    4x9 Array cascadeco's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by DeliriousDisposition View Post
    And even an evolved INFJ is different than another evolved INFJ as we take in all life exp. and their personal preferrences based on their life exp. But their motivations and expressions will be similar but may be displayed differently at different times. Hope I made sense lol
    Yes, this does make sense. I think my point also was that when type descriptions/theory become so cumbersome and complicated as to be rather unwieldy, etc, not many people are going to be drawn to explore it anyway.

    I guess the beauty of the 16 types is that it is fairly straightforward..on the surface. But obviously to fully understand, you have to dig a lot deeper and then nuances emerge...and that's when I think it becomes more individualized and you're starting to look into basic human psychology -- forget type! :-) And...going with your quote above....in a sense if all INFJ's can behave rather differently...then, well, how useful is Type? (even though yes, fundamentally, INFJ's will be quite different from, say, your ESTx's). So yeah, I get what you're saying, but also think what you're saying can both support mbti AND discredit mbti, depending on how you look at it. ;-)
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  7. #107
    ish red no longer *sad* Array nightning's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by DeliriousDisposition View Post
    kekeke I figured you'd play the devil's advocate once I began reading your post! And yes, you're very right, we move away from the typical understanding of our Type if we all become emotionally healthy and use well the full spectrum of CP. People are balanced then (hurray!) but the only difference in discerning b/w Types at that point is in knowing the person's motivations and how one might express oneself based on Type. An INFJs motivations and expressing will still be different than an ESTPs, for the most part. Also, it still shows that while an INFJ will become more outgoing (and sometimes is initially seen so anyway), they might not handle it as well as an ESTP as being around too many people might be hard to 'focus' + it drains them (just not as quickly lol), whereas an ESTP might learn to appreciate being alone but will still feel 'energized' by being with others. (I don't know ESTPs, but am just using them as an example )

    And even an evolved INFJ is different than another evolved INFJ as we take in all life exp. and their personal preferrences based on their life exp. But their motivations and expressions will be similar but may be displayed differently at different times. Hope I made sense lol
    Oh no... I'm don't think you should be let off the hook so easily! What's the purpose of this thread again? To help people determine their type? While it's true that we all are individuals and so will be different, there are still underlying principles that a typical INFJ or INFP believe in, their approach to life (group aggregate... call it central tendency, mean, median, mode whatever! Sorry... I'm frustrated with a stat assignment at the moment. Don't mind me. )

    I think there needs to be more emphasis of type by thinking processes. Your MBTI type is not determined by behaviour or actions, but by what goes on inside your head. The process of thinking, gathering info to make a decision. Sure knowledge, experience and background can influence the decision. But in the end, I believe your dominant function will always be the easiest to utilize. The thinking process will inherently reflect that dominant function (Ni or Fi). Thus people should look at that to determine whether they're INFJ or INFP or something else.

  8. #108
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    Quote Originally Posted by cascademn View Post
    Yes, this does make sense. I think my point also was that when type descriptions/theory become so cumbersome and complicated as to be rather unwieldy, etc, not many people are going to be drawn to explore it anyway.
    Hmm, I don't think of it as complicated. At least,not anymore, anyway, once I started seirously looking into it. I'd imagine most people, currently? or more of the older generations, won't be drawn to it or find it as astrology and such. It's okay to discount it if it doesn't appeal to you.

    I guess the beauty of the 16 types is that it is fairly straightforward..on the surface. But obviously to fully understand, you have to dig a lot deeper and then nuances emerge...and that's when I think it becomes more individualized and you're starting to look into basic human psychology -- forget type! :-)


    So yeah, I get what you're saying, but also think what you're saying can both support mbti AND discredit mbti, depending on how you look at it. ;-)
    True! I think it's fine not knowing about your Type if you don't find the value of it. I think it's a good tool if you want to explore differenes in people. But, let's be frank, most people in this world are largely unevolved due to so many factors inhibiting them.

    And...going with your quote above....in a sense if all INFJ's can behave rather differently...then, well, how useful is Type? (even though yes, fundamentally, INFJ's will be quite different from, say, your ESTx's).
    It is useful in knowing the motivations and expressions of the Types. We all can't be evolved 100% of the time. Stress happens, chaos and crises happen. If we can understand where this person is coming from and how they're reacting, we can better help them. My ISTP best/f for example. She can BLOW UP when she's finally pushed enough. People around her erroneously think to "touch" and comfort her. She BLOWS UP again! I've learned to give her space when she gets angry at people, but she's more welcoming if I "hug" or comfort her immediately than other people. I'm probably the only one she allows to do that, not even her family can do that.

    I recall our first big argument years ago (and the only one). I kept trying amd trying to "reach" (Fe) her by talking the problem out as I found it was a misunderstanding and she didn't like it b/c she wanted to be alone (Fi is an ISTPs last CP). I stopped, told her I'd give her a moment to compose herself and then we discussed and resolved. This was at a time when I didn't know anything about CP or Types (except mine), mind you, but I've been looking back on how I've re/acted + on other people whose Types I know of. It's helped me understand how to approach people better for the future. It's valuable to me in one sense for that. If others don't value it, that's fine too To each their own!

  9. #109
    ish red no longer *sad* Array nightning's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by cascademn View Post
    in a sense if all INFJ's can behave rather differently...then, well, how useful is Type?
    Type is a model and only a model. It is only as useful as its predictive abilities whether it can explain behavior (under the assumption that unconscious thinking processes manifest themselves in our thoughts and actions). The underlying theories in typology is irrefutable... for we can never directly access the unconscious. So the basis of MBTI type cannot be proven. With that said, if all INFJs can and do in fact behave differently (on correlation between type and behavior at all) then MBTI is useless. Nobody has done much in depth testing though. Or perhaps they have and noticed it failed time and time again... but since corporates started using it and they hate to admit that they made some decisions based on something that's wrong (*whistles*)... Those studies have be swept aside as irrelevant.

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    Quote Originally Posted by nightning View Post
    Oh no... I'm don't think you should be let off the hook so easily! What's the purpose of this thread again? To help people determine their type? While it's true that we all are individuals and so will be different, there are still underlying principles that a typical INFJ or INFP believe in, their approach to life (group aggregate... call it central tendency, mean, median, mode whatever! Sorry... I'm frustrated with a stat assignment at the moment. Don't mind me. )

    I think there needs to be more emphasis of type by thinking processes. Your MBTI type is not determined by behaviour or actions, but by what goes on inside your head. The process of thinking, gathering info to make a decision. Sure knowledge, experience and background can influence the decision. But in the end, I believe your dominant function will always be the easiest to utilize. The thinking process will inherently reflect that dominant function (Ni or Fi). Thus people should look at that to determine whether they're INFJ or INFP or something else.
    But I doooo take that in with CP! Have you seen my posts! lolol CP is as much thinking processes as it is acting and reacting processes. What goes inside your head will come out sooner or later (I hope!) by either acting or reacting on your thoughts or due to the thoughts/acting/reacting of others. Learning about CP is multifunctional tool for oneself and for us all!

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